Breaking Through
by TheNewMoo
Summary: Chapter 40 is up. Finally! And this story is COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

I went to Vegas for a wedding this weekend, and on the way home, realized I had to write this story...it all just fell into place...and I've got some songs to use too! Here goes nothing...  
  
Setting: Woody, Jordan & Nigel are all at the Pogue after the events of the season finale (which I cannot remember the name of o.O) Max is there too, but he's kinda the "narrator" of this little fic...)  
  
((The song in this chapter is "You're the Only One" by Keith Urban))  
  
CHAPTER 1:  
  
~~Max~~ At least my girl's getting back to normal...these last few weeks she's been pretty shook up about the whole Malden thing-and she's got every reason to be. She's been having nightmares again...same type as after Emily died. Everyone at the morgue's been saying that she's seemed kinda "off" lately...at least she's got friends that she can go to and cry to...especially Woodrow...she likes him. It's kinda weird seeing my baby girl going all snuggly up to another guy...but I suppose it's for the best. He's real good to her. I probably should go see if they want any drinks instead of sitting here staring at them...  
  
~~Woody~~ God she's beautiful...it doesn't matter what she looks like...she's always beautiful. I wish she would talk to me about how she's feeling...I only want to help her..but I can't make her understand that. I wish I knew how to make her open up...  
  
~~Nigel~~ Look at him...he's hopeless...stares at her like a cat stares at a giant ball of yarn...but in a good way. Poor bloke can't get his nerve up to tell her, he just sits and it all bottles up inside his heart. That can't be good for his health...funny how she doesn't even realize he's staring at her...I think Max sees it...here he comes now...  
  
~~Jordan~~ Ok--why is everyone staring at me all of a sudden? Do I have something on my face? What's going on? Nigel's got that grin of his...Woody's getting that glazed over look...and Dad looks like he's about to watch a sappy movie...something is definately up. I'll ask Dad when he brings us drinks...which won't be long. He'll want to know what we're all talking about...here he comes now...  
  
"Alright folks, tonight's on the house, and I've got cold ones..."  
  
"Dad, you know you're gonna go broke if you do this all the time."  
  
"Yeah mate, let us pay..." Nigel dug into his coat and pulled out a wallet.  
  
"Max...we have jobs, we have money...and we--"  
  
Dad cut him off. "Tonight's on the house. We're celebrating."  
  
"Celebrating?" I raised an eyebrow. "What do we have to celebrate?"  
  
Nigel was as confused as I was, and Woody still had that glazed look in his eyes...but not as bad as earlier.  
  
~~Woody~~ I love it when she argues...she gets that cute little look on her face that makes her look more beautiful than she already is...crap. She's looking at me...look down...nervous silence pause...then glance up...  
  
~~Nigel~~ Now this is just bloody pathetic! He's sitting here like a lovesick puppy drooling over a new toy...grow a backbone already...I mean, yeah, Jordan's pretty damn hot and all...well really hot, but her dad's right there mate! Snap out of it...hopeless I tell you...  
  
~~Max~~ That boy is so lost in staring at her...if he leans on his arm any harder he'll flip the table...and spilling the beers would NOT be a good thing to do, especially if they're free. Jordan's lucky...she doesn't know what she has in him...yet.  
  
~~Jordan~~ They're staring again! All of them! What in the hell is going on here?! It would seem like I have a second head growing out of my neck! These people have problems...how do I work with them?  
  
"Guys...do we have a problem? Have I sprouted a new growth somewhere that I can't see?"  
  
Nigel shook his head. "No Luv, just thinking..."  
  
Woody glanced around nervously. "I wasn't staring. Honest."  
  
Max grabbed the tray and started back for the bar. "Just leaving baby..."  
  
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom real fast...make sure I look okay...I can't trust you guys..." I stood up and walked down the hall, and proceeded to examine every inch of my face in the mirror  
  
~~Nigel~~ She's leaving...good. This'll give me time to get little farmboy here a backbone...he needs one bad enough...  
  
"Come on boy! What are you waiting for?" I nudged him playfully.  
  
"What are you talking about Nigel?"  
  
"It's obvious mate...you love her. Tell her." Better to be blunt since I was strapped for time...  
  
He sat shocked for a few seconds, then grinned. "It's that obvious?"  
  
Max piped up from across the bar. "Yeah Hoyt. It's obvious. And no, I don't care...tell her. She need's it."  
  
~~Woody~~ They've got me...but I guess I'm glad. Now to confront the fear...and tell our mysterious Jordan the truth. But how?  
  
"Ask her to dance mate...I know the perfect song." Nigel stood and flipped through a stack of cds that were in a box next to the stereo. "Here it is. Ask her to dance then play track 7. It'll work."  
  
I was stunned. Nigel was acting like cupid reencarnated...but he's been with ladies, so it would work right? "You sure?"  
  
"Track 7. It's perfect...here she comes...go get her."  
  
~~Jordan~~ Ok, not growing second head. We're good...now what are they up to? Oh god Nigel's got that grin again...this cannot be good. Why's he going to the bar...and why is Woody standing in my way?  
  
"Dance with me Jordan."  
  
"What?" Since when did he dance?  
  
"Just dance, please...once?" His eyes were begging me to.  
  
"Alright..." I shot a look back at Dad, who just waved me on, then Nigel who still had that grin plastered on his face...  
  
~~Woody~~ So far so good. Track 7...play...ok here we go. Breathe Hoyt...relax...and dance.  
  
I pulled her towards me as the opening strains of the song drifted across the room. Country? How did Nigel know about country songs?  
  
"Your The Only One" --I know it's gonna take some time  
  
For you to trust this love of mine  
  
I know he broke your heart in two  
  
You've been betrayed and ... your afraid  
  
That I will do the same to you But you'll be safe here in my arms ... forever and a day  
  
Though you don't believe me now ... I'll never walk away  
  
You ... You know that I'll be there ... when tomorrow comes--  
  
~~Jordan~~ Oh God. Oh God. Crap! He can't...he does...oh no...can he tell that I love him too? Or is he just testing me on it? How did he find out? Dad better not have told him anything...  
  
~~Nigel~~ Now for the kicker...I knew this song would work!  
  
~~Woody~~ I love her. Absolutely love her...and now she knows it...I wonder what she thinks. I hope I don't scare her off by doing this...but she seems alright...she's still dancing with me, this song must be working somewhat...  
  
--( Your the only one )  
  
I know you've heard this all before  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
Your the one that I adore  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
You make me shine just like the sun  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
You bring this heart of mine undone  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
~~Jordan~~ Wow...he's a great dancer...and his eyes...I never realized how beautiful they are until now...I think that I've been in love with him the whole time...and Dad knew it...so did Nige.  
  
~~Woody~~ She's snuggling into me...is she actually getting closer? This is great!  
  
--For every Lie you've ever heard  
  
You can believe my every word... yes you can  
  
Whatever heaven holds in store  
  
Through good and bad ... I'll be your man  
  
Stand beside you through it all But you'll be safe here in my arms ... forever and a day  
  
Though you don't believe me now ... I'll never walk away  
  
And you ... you know that I'll be there ... when tomorrow comes  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
I know you've heard this all before  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
Your the one that I adore  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
You make me shine just like the sun  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
You bring this heart of mine undone  
  
( Your the only one ) I know you've heard this all before  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
But your the one that I adore  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
You make me shine just like the sun  
  
( Your the only one )  
  
You bring this heart of mine undone  
  
( Your the only one ) ( Your the only one ) Make me shine just like the sun ... yes you do ( Your the only one )  
  
~~Woody~~ It's over...but she's not pulling away from me...is she? Crying?  
  
~~Jordan~~ Don't cry...you'll make him think he did something wrong!  
  
"What's wrong Jordan?"  
  
I looked up at him and sniffled. "Nothing. You're perfect."  
  
"What?" He stood there shocked. "Perfect. For me." I stared at him, then leaned in a kissed him straight on the lips...it just seemed right at the time...  
  
~~Nigel~~ I knew it! Yes! I glanced over at Max and saw him wiping away a tear with the corner of a napkin. "It's great isn't it?"  
  
He nodded. "I knew it...and I love it."  
  
~~Woody~~ We held that kiss for what seemed like forever...then just held each other. I liked this...and I knew she did too... "You're perfect too Jordan." I knew I said it right when all she did was squeeze tighter, and we just stood there holding each other...ignoring all the other people in the bar. This was great...  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
***Yay! I had to write this! It had to come out...and I have more planned! Thanks for reading this LONG chapter! Review please (if you wanna) Thanks!*** 


	2. Chapter 2

Here comes chapter 2! I'm loving this anti-writer's block spoof I'm getting...it rocks!  
  
This chapter takes place in various places in Boston, after the events of chapter 1 (duh)...You should be able to figure it out! You're all intelligent people! Here we go!  
  
CHAPTER 2:  
  
((Still in the bar, but Nigel and Max talk for a bit.))  
  
~~Nigel~~ I knew it would work! Look at Jordan's face! She's actually smiling...hasn't done that in a while. Woody's grin...I don't know how his cheeks can hold that! It's huge! So is Max's...this is great!  
  
~~Max~~ Now she gets it. God they're cute together...Emily would have loved to see this. Jordan looks so happy. This is probably the first time she's actually let someone hold her...and I mean really hold her in a long time...besides me of course. I hope she knows I'm happy for her...  
  
"Nigel...I'll have to say--you're a genius."  
  
"Nah mate...just a little luck." He grinned. "Let's leave it at the fact that I'm a bit experienced in that...catergory of life." Laughing, he took another drink off the beer in front of him.  
  
"Well, luck or whatever. You made Jordan see the good in Hoyt...he'd better be good to her." I grabbed a towel and wiped off the countertop. "He does one thing to break her heart..."  
  
He stopped me. "I'll make him VERY uncomfortable. Don't worry about it. I'm good in that catergory as well." He winked, then we both turned towards them.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I feel so safe...normally I would be freaking out about now. I don't know what it is, but he's...he's making me feel all happy. Dad's probably flipping out at all this...suprised he hasn't wrung Nige's neck yet. Well, he seems happy...he's chatting with Nige, and there's no blood...maybe this'll work out!  
  
"Woody?"  
  
"Yeah Jordan?"  
  
"When did you learn how to dance?"  
  
"I'm self taught...few people know that. Keep it secret." He pressed a finger to my lips. "No telling."  
  
I nodded, then grabbed him by the hand and pulled him over to the bar. Better to find out now than never...  
  
"Hey Dad." I grinned up at him.  
  
"Hey Sweetheart." He pulled two beers out of the fridge and put them in front of us. "Celebrate. That's what we're here tonight for."  
  
Nigel grinned. "Brought to you by your friendly neighborhood Brit."  
  
I tried to shove him off the barstool. "This was a LONG time in coming...it would have happened by itself."  
  
"Bloody Hell it would have Jordan!" He grinned. "Little farmboy here needed a swift backbone implant to get things going..."  
  
"Hey Nigel. I would have told her sooner or later."  
  
"Nope. Not a chance mate...not a bloody chance..."  
  
Max nodded. "You looked pretty shaky there for a minute...we were worried about you..."  
  
Woody raised his arms. "So I was shy...there's nothing wrong with that." He reached for the beer in front of him. "We're here to celebrate, not analyze."  
  
Nigel nodded. "We do enough of that at work."  
  
"Exactly." I grinned. Work was going to be so much easier, now that I had Woody. One problem...I was going to want to be around him all the time...that could make it difficult.  
  
Woody stood up and yawned. "We've all gotta be at work early tomorrow...I should get going."  
  
Dad glanced up at the clock. "It's already twelve forty-five? It doesn't seem like it at all..."  
  
"Bloody Hell...I've gotta get home to Rudy." He downed the rest of his beer and dug around in his pockets for his keys.  
  
Me, Woody and Dad all looked at him. "Rudy?" We all said it in unison.  
  
Woody grinned. "Nigel, can I TRUST your relationship tactics?"  
  
Dad just laughed, and so did I. "Great, we've got Nigel here with a guy waiting for him at his apartment..."  
  
He shook his head. "No...Rudy's not a guy. He's a dog."  
  
"A dog? Nige, when did you get a dog?" I was amazed...Nigel...pet...scary combination...  
  
"I got him yesterday Jordan...I drove past the shelter, and it was the day of the monthly adoption fair...and I stopped to look." He stood up and pulled his coat on.  
  
"What kind of dog is he?" Woody was putting on his coat too.  
  
"A bulldog. I think he's a mix...he's got kinda weird ears for a bulldog..." He found his keys, and threw a few dollars into the tip jar on the counter. "I'd love to stay, but the poor bloke's probably lonely..."  
  
"Alright Nige...have a good night...drive safe ok?" I smiled at him.  
  
"I will Jordan." He was almost to the door when I remembered something.  
  
"Nigel wait!" I ran over to him.  
  
He stopped by the door. "Yeah Jordan?"  
  
I grabbed him and gave him the biggest hug I could. "Thanks Nige...for everything."  
  
He hugged me back. "You're very welcome Jordan. Just be good alright...think before you act." He winked. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."  
  
"Oh that leaves me in a good spot..." I nudged him. "Go home, your dog misses you."  
  
"Good night Jordan." He walked out the door, and climbed in his truck and drove off.  
  
I turned around to see Woody walking my way. "I've gotta go too Jordan. You want a ride back to your apartment?"  
  
"No, I've been staying here since the whole Malden thing. I feel safer here...with Dad." I smiled at him. "But I'll see you tomorrow morning okay?"  
  
"Ok Jordan." He leaned in and gave me one little kiss on the cheek. "Sleep good okay?"  
  
"I will." It wasn't true. I wasn't going to be able to sleep a wink...he wouldn't be able to either.  
  
He turned and walked out the door, with a wave to me and Dad. I watched him drive off, then went back and sat at the bar.  
  
"What'll it be Sweetheart?"  
  
"A kiss and good night. I'm exhausted." I leaned over the counter, and he kissed me on the cheek.  
  
"Goodnight Jordan. And you did good today." he smiled at me, then came around the end of the bar. "Let's go to bed sweetheart."  
  
"Alright Dad." I put my arm around him and walked with him towards the front. Tonight had been great...and I couldn't wait for tomorrow.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
***Next chapter later! Thanks for reading! And I plan to get more into a different subject, but I'll leave you guessing...for now at least!*** 


	3. Chapter 3

***Thanks for the feedback! My first W/J story, so I hope its a good one! I never did a disclaimer, so I should do one now: Don't own them, never will, so don't think I do. Ok? Now we're good...off to the story!***  
  
((This chapter takes place the next day, at the morgue.))  
  
~~Garret~~ Alright...think Garret. You've got three cases, all before nine. It's raining, and you can guess some more people are gonna die today...morbid as it may seem. Now one would expect to see all bright and shining faces of staff by nine...where the hell are they? Bug's the only one here, and only because he pulled an overnight. Lily called and said she's on her way, but in traffic...but no Jordan, no Nigel.  
  
"Bug can you come in here please?" I saw him walk down the hallway.  
  
"Yes Dr. Macy?" He was holding a vial that had something in it, probably an insect.  
  
"Is Nigel normally late to work on Mondays?"  
  
Bug looked around. "Not usually Dr. Macy...do you want me to call him at home and see if he's there?"  
  
"That would be great Bug. Tell him to get his butt in here pronto. We've got alot of cases today." He nodded, then walked out of the room. I picked up a file for the Jane Doe in Exam 3. Five-seven, red hair, blue eyes, with burns on her wrists and neck. Probably from rope or a cord...signs of foul play. I though for a moment, then put the file in Jordan's box. Next file...an eighty-nine year old woman found dead in her room at the county nursing home. I'll give that one to Peter...should be easy enough. Third case...another unknown, but a boy this time. The kid looked pretty young, probably had been living on the streets for a while. Cops found him in an alley on the edge of town during a midnight patrol. No visual signs of harm at first exam...Nigel will be able to find something on this little guy I thought.  
  
"Excuse me, Dr. Macy?"  
  
I looked up. "Yes Peter?"  
  
"I was wondering, have you assigned the cases from this morning yet?"  
  
"Yes, and you have the woman in Exam 2. Fresh from Eastside Nursing..." I handed him the file.  
  
"Thanks Dr. Macy. I'll get on it right away." He turned and left, down the hall to Exam 2.  
  
Bug walked into the room. "I called Nigel."  
  
I looked at him expectantly. "And?"  
  
"He's on his way, he's sorry he's gonna be late, but he had to feed his dog."  
  
"Nigel has a dog?" This was interesting. "Since when?"  
  
"Since Saturday afternoon. He picked him up at the shelter." Bug looked at the case files on my desk. "Got one for me?"  
  
I shook my head. "You pulled the double, you get the next case that comes in, alright?"  
  
"Ok Dr. Macy." He turned and walked out of the room, and nearly collided with a very awake Jordan. "Good morning Jordan."  
  
"Good morning Bug!" She was smiling...at 9:13 AM...this was odd. "Good morning Garret! Got a case all ready for me?"  
  
"Yeah Jordan...and why are you so happy? Do we need to do random drug testing again?" I handed her the file.  
  
"No, I just had a very good night's rest, and I'm ready to work. Anything wrong with that?" She took a sip of coffee from the mug that was in her hand.  
  
"No, just wondering, that's all. By the way, have you seen Nigel yet this morning?"  
  
"Can't say that I have...why, is he hungover or something?" She grinned at me.  
  
"Should he be?" This was getting more interesting by the second...  
  
"Nope, not at all. Now, If you'll excuse me, I have a date with a redhead I have to keep..." She walked out of the room, and headed for another cup of coffee.  
  
~~Jordan~~ Is it that obvious? First thing outta Garret's mouth is "Why are you so happy?"...it's gotta be. And good, maybe I can get a raise or something for my "good work attitude". Probably not, but there's no harm in trying!  
  
~~Nigel~~ This is odd...I smell like dog. My truck smells like dog, my clothes smell like dog food, and I showered this morning. Bug said Garret was pretty ticked about me being late, but oh well. I'll pull the double tonight...that'll make up for it. I'll have to bring Rudy to work though...I can keep him in my office. Thank God he's housebroken...why is there never any parking around here?! I've gotta park all the way out in the boonies and run my hide back to the front door in this rain...suprised I haven't seen any accidents yet...alright, time to run!  
  
~~Jordan~~ Well, there goes Nigel...he's dripping as he walks...the janitor is gonna hate him! Anyways, think Jordan...a beautiful woman is found dead with signs of restraint and brusing...but how did she die? I'll take X-rays first to see if anythings broken, then go from there...  
  
"Need some help Jordan?"  
  
"Oh, hi Bug. I'm just gonna do some prelim's on our Jane Doe here. Could you take prints and run them through Missing Persons and APHIS?"  
  
"Sure. Let me go get the scanner." He turned and left, then came back with the fingerprint scanner. "We just hook this up to the computer, then scan, and it'll search for matches."  
  
"Alright, you do that while I go load the film in the x-ray."  
  
~~Garret~~  
  
"Nigel, come in here for a minute."  
  
"Yeah Dr. Macy?" He stood at the edge of the door, trying to keep my carpet dry.  
  
"You got a dog?" I raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Yes sir. A bulldog. His name's Rudy." He smiled.  
  
"Are you going to let him make you late to work again?"  
  
"No sir. It was just because I didn't get home until late...he was lonely."  
  
"Alright. Come here real fast and get your case for this morning. Try not to soak my carpet." I picked up the case and handed it to him. "It's a kid, cops found him in an alley on the edge of town."  
  
He winced. "I hate doing kids...its so sad."  
  
I nodded. "It sucks, but we don't know anything about this guy...I figured you'd be the best to find out all that we can about him..."  
  
"Thanks...I'll take that as a compliment." He turned and walked out the door.  
  
I went back to filling out a stack of forms that had appeared on my desk. I mumbled to myself "They want me to analyze what?"  
  
~~Nigel~~ I hate doing kids...especially if they've been killed unnaturally...makes you so mad sometimes. Let's see, he's in drawer 6...lets pull him out and take a look...bloody hell...the little guy can't be older than five. Just slide him onto a gurney and take him into Exam 4, if no ones in there...  
  
I grabbed a pair of gloves, then started undressing the kid. No visual signs of a struggle, and only a few bruises on his arms, but they looked pretty old. There were scars on his chest...it looked like he had been burned with a match at least three dozen times...there were also slashes across his shoulderblades from what looked like a razor...or maybe another kind of blade. It was all adding up to a case of child abuse...some ass had to take out anger on something, so he picks the kid...no wonder the kid was out on the streets. I needed to know where the cops found him...so I covered the body with a sheet and went to go find Garret, since it didn't say in the file.  
  
~~Jordan~~ The woman had been beatup pretty bad, and it was almost postive that she had been suffocated to death. After I got the x-rays back, I noticed that she had something in her throat that wasn't normal.  
  
"Bug, can you get the scope for me, and a pair of tweezers?"  
  
"Yeah, you find something?" He handed me the tweezers, and placed the light down her throat.  
  
"I think these are shards of plastic..." I removed several chunks of what appeared to be thin plastic, like from a plastic bag. There was a thin, white residue that stuck to the bag.  
  
"Bug, did we run a tox-screen on her yet?"  
  
"No, do we need to?" He grabbed a syringe and looked for a vein.  
  
"I think she OD on something...probably cocaine...but I'm guessing it was accidental...she probably tried to swallow the bag, but it ripped. The stuff went straight into her bloodstream...probably killed her pretty quick."  
  
"Jordan, you are too good at this..." Bug grinned  
  
"Well, just run the tox, then tell me alright? I need to go make a phone call."  
  
~~Nigel~~  
  
"Garret? I need to ask you some questions about the kid that I'm working on."  
  
"Yes?" He looked up at me.  
  
"Where exactly did the police find him? Did they tell you?" I leaned up against the door and yawned.  
  
"They didn't put it in the file?"  
  
"Nope, just says on the edge of town. I'd like to go check out where they found him for myself...the poor guy has evidence of abuse all over him...I might be able to ask around, show his picture, maybe get an ID on him."  
  
"Well, go take some photos, I'll call the cops that brought him in, and come back in a few minutes. Ok?"  
  
"Thanks Garret." I went back to the exam room and started taking pictures. Someone had to know who this kid was...I just had to find them.  
  
~~Jordan~~ Two PM...do you know where your lover is? That's why you're calling him...maybe he's free for lunch. The new place Italian place downtown is open...dial his number...and the extentsion...  
  
"This is Hoyt."  
  
"Hey you...what's up?"  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
***Had to leave you hanging! I'm on a rampage here! Chapter 4 soon! ((NEXT CHAPTER: Jordan and Woody goto lunch, and Nigel's going all vigilante justice on this case!))*** 


	4. Chapter 4

This is the next chapter (duh) and it's gonna be an interesting one!  
  
CHAPTER 4:  
  
~~Jordan~~ "Hey what's up?" I twirled the phone cord around my finger and glanced around the office.  
  
"Nothing much Jordan...why'd you call?"  
  
"Woody, I was wondering if you were free for lunch this afternoon. I heard that the new Italian place downtown is open now, and it's pretty good, according to what I've heard here around the office."  
  
"Um...I think I'm free...there's nobody knocking on my door, and I don't have to go anywhere so...sure!"  
  
"Ok! You want to meet there at say...one-twentish?"  
  
"Sure Jordan! I'll see you there!"  
  
"Ok Woody. See you later."  
  
"Bye."  
  
I hung up the phone and walked back into Exam 3. Now to get Bug to cover for me while I went to lunch.  
  
"Bug, can you do me a huge favor?"  
  
He turned away from the body and shrugged. "I dunno Jordan...what is it?"  
  
"I need you to work this girl while I go out to lunch. I'm meeting someone at the new Italian cafe downtown."  
  
"Who are you meeting?" He grinned at me.  
  
"Woody. We're going to...discuss some information on a case he's working on." I prayed he would believe me. "Just this once Bug...please?"  
  
"Alright Jordan...but be good and don't stay gone too long. Macy's hard to trick these days..."  
  
"Thanks Bug!" I gave him a quick hug, pulled off my scrubs, grabbed my bag and keys, and slipped out into the elevator. I couldn't wait to see Woody.  
  
~~Nigel~~ I swear, whoever did this to this little guy was terrible...it's hard for me even to take the pictures of the kid. These bruises are old...but they're pretty damn recent. I bet if I x-rayed him, I'd find old fractures and other signs of abuse...if only I could find out who did this to him...or who he was...but that's why I'm taking pictures. Someone's gotta know who he is.  
  
"Nigel, I got more information from the cops who found your kid." Garret walked in holding a sheet of paper.  
  
"Where'd they find him?  
  
"Scott Alley, off of the East Boston Expressway and Creek Square. He was wrapped in a sheet, under a few cardboard boxes. On-Site said he hadn't been there very long..." He handed me the paper with all the info on it.  
  
"Thanks Garret. Mind if I run over there and take some photos of the scene, show the kid's picture around?" I knew he was going to say yes, so I grabbed the camera bag and a few extra rolls of film.  
  
"Go ahead, just be careful, and don't make it too obvious what you're doing, since you're only looking for information." He turned and walked out of the room, and I put the camera, film, some gloves, and an evidence kit in the bag, then laid it on the table. I leaned over and pulled the sheet over the boy, then wheeled him back into the crypt. I put him back in drawer 6, then grabbed the bag and headed for the elevator. I glanced up at the sky when I went outside...it had stopped raining for the moment, but it seemed like it could start again at any second. I threw the camera bag on the passenger seat, and took off towards where the cops said they found the kid.  
  
~~Jordan~~ Alright, here's the place. Doesn't look too busy...I'll go in and see if Woody's here already. There he is, sitting at the little table by the window. I'll just stroll over there and say hello...  
  
"Hey Woody."  
  
"Hi Jordan." He stood up and gave me a hug, then pulled out my chair for me to sit in.  
  
"There you are madam..." He went and sat across from me, and took a sip of water from the glass in front of him. "I didn't know what you wanted to drink, so I just got some water to start with."  
  
"Sounds good to me." I reached over and grabbed a menu, and tried to decide between the chicken with alfredo sauce, and the lasagna...the waiter came over and asked what we would like to drink, and I ordered an iced tea, and Woody got a Coke.  
  
"I need my caffeine Jordan...so don't ask." He grinned at me.  
  
"I wasn't planning on it...farmboy." I smiled at him, then hid behind the menu. "The chicken or the lasagna...what sounds better to you?"  
  
"I would say the chicken myself, but it's up to you."  
  
The waiter came back and set a basket of fresh breadsticks on the table, along with our drinks, then took out his notepad and asked if we were ready to order.  
  
I nodded. "Yes, I'd like the chicken with alfredo sauce, with a small salad on the side please. With ranch dressing."  
  
Woody thought for a minute, then smiled. "I'll have the same as she's ordering." he took my menu, and then handed them both to the waiter. The waiter left and Woody leaned over across the table to me. "The chicken sounded so delicious I couldn't resist..."  
  
I reached for a breadstick and pretended to hit him over the head with it, then took a bite. He only laughed, and we spent the next 10 minutes while we were waiting for our food pretending to attack each other, and talking about how work was going for each of us. We were laughing so hard that we didn't even realize when the waiter came back with our plates. I think we scared him off, cause he just gave us a funny look then walked away.  
  
"Jordan, I think he's afraid of us." He said, motioning towards the waiter.  
  
"Nah, he's just jealous..." I grabbed my fork, and after I managed to take my napkin back from Woody, we both began eating.  
  
The food was delicious, and after we had finished, had a small piece of chocolate cake, and Woody had INSISTED on paying for my food as well as his, he walked with me out to my SUV and gave me a hug before I climbed in.  
  
"Have a wonderful rest of the day Jordan..." He smiled.  
  
"Thank you sir, now, I must be off to work with a bright and happy smile!" I laughed then added "Before Garret finds out I'm gone!" I closed the door to my Explorer and drove off, honking twice at Woody before I pulled out of the parking lot. Now, back to work.... 


	5. Chapter 5

***To make up for the short chapter 4, I'll post chapter 5 right away! Here we go! And I found out how to italicize the thoughts of the person! so don't be confused, it should be easier!***  
  
This chapter takes place in a few different places, mainly the morgue, and the streets of Boston.  
  
CHAPTER 5:  
  
~~Nigel~~ Here we go...the cops said that they saw the kid right over here...under those boxes. Now to grab some evidence and show his picture around, and maybe someone will know this kid. I grabbed a pair of gloves out of the bag, took one look at the darkening sky overhead, and gently lifted the boxes off the asphalt. There were no visible signs of struggle on the ground, and there was nothing that would suggest the boy had been killed in the alley. I took some photos anyways, just to be sure, and then packed the camera up. I didn't want it getting wet in the rain, since it was now sprinkling. I grabbed the pictures that I had taken of the boy and started walking down the street, asking everyone that I had come across if they knew who he was. All I got was the typical: "Nope, Sorry, I have no idea, That's a shame, Good luck on finding him..." the general answers that weren't going to help. I went into the cigar and smoke shop next to the alley, and it was empty except for a middle aged man who was sitting at the counter, rolling cigarettes. I walked up to him and laid the picture on the counter.  
  
"Have you ever seen this kid?" I pushed it towards him.  
  
He studied it for a moment. "I can't say that I have. I don't get business from kids, and the parent's rarely bring kids in here. No good for their health, they say." He pushed the picture back to me.  
  
"He was found dead in the alley behind your shop last night. Did you notice anything weird going on last night?"  
  
"Besides the normal drunks and druggies roving the streets?" He laughed. "I don't bother to look outside anymore, I'm usually pretty damn busy nights. Lots of buyers stop in after most of the bars close down."  
  
"If you remember anything," I scribbled my number to my office on a scrap of paper. "Call me and leave a message alright mate?"  
  
He took the paper and nodded. "I will."  
  
Just then, a group of a few guys walked in and leaned on the counter. "Hey Matt--roll us up some fresh ones...we're going out tonight!"  
  
I grabbed the picture and handed it to one of the guys. "Any of you ever seen this kid around here?"  
  
They passed the picture around, and all shook their heads. "Nope, sorry man. Never seen him before in my life." One of them handed it back to me with a slight grin on his face. "Good Luck on finding out who he is."  
  
I took the picture back from him and turned to leave. "Thanks." As I walked out the door, I heard them all laughing. Stupid jerks, can't be bothered with the poor little bloke that they probably saw get dumped in that alley... I grabbed my keys and pulled myself into my truck, just as it started to rain. A huge clap of thunder shook the sky, and it started to absolutely pour. I thought to myself: I've gotta go back to my apartment and get Rudy...poor little guy's probably scared to death!  
  
I drove silently back to my apartment and ran into the building, up the 5 flights of stairs, and I had to fight to get the key into the lock. I opened the door, and shut it behind me quickly. I didn't want him to escape out of the door. I slowly walked from room to room, calling his name. I found him under a pile of my old scrubs, shaking and whimpering. "Come here buddy..." I sat on the floor and held out my arms, and Rudy proceeded to crawl across the floor and into my lap, where I was smothered by kisses. And these were bulldog kisses...where they snort while licking you...but it was okay. Another clap of thunder sent him flying back under the pile and more whimpering and shaking ensued. "It's alright Rudy, it's only thunder...I pulled him out from under the pile, then reached up to my table and grabbed his harness off it, then put it on him. "You've gotta come to work with me tonight...I've gotta pull a double shift." I looked up at the clock and sighed. I had enough time to change into some dry clothes, then I had to get back to work. I pulled off all the wet stuff I had on, threw it in a pile on the bathroom floor, and put on dry scrubs, shoes, and grabbed a couple Cokes out of the fridge. I was gonna need them to stay awake tonight! I clipped Rudy to his leash, grabbed a bag full of chew toys, food, a bowl, and a few pairs of the old scrubs he had been hiding under and walked out of the door, down the stairs, and out into the rain. I didn't get very far though, I had to pick up Rudy and carry him across the puddles. I guess bulldogs don't like water... I jumped in my truck, and took off towards the morgue. Hopefully Garret won't mind this too much...  
  
~~Jordan~~ Thank God, time to get out of here and get home...I hate when it rains. I wish I was with Woody right now...asleep in his arms...  
  
"Jordan?" Garret stepped into my office, and my daydream.  
  
"Yeah boss?" I grinned up at him.  
  
"You leaving anytime soon?"  
  
"In a few minutes, after I turn off my computer...why?"  
  
"Because I'm about to leave, and I'll walk with you out to your car if you want."  
  
"Sure Garret, that would be awesome. Let me get my stuff." I gathered up my bag, shoved some case files into it, and flicked off the lights in the office. "I'm ready...who's staying here tonight?"  
  
Garret looked at his watch. "Nigel's supposed to be, and Peter's here still running some tests."  
  
We both turned when we heard the elevator doors slide open, along with the clicking of nails on the floor. There was Nigel, with a very wet coat, and a very wet bulldog.  
  
"So this is Rudy, huh Nige?" I bent down to pet the dog.  
  
"Yes, this would be him." He looked up at Garret. "I'm not planning on doing this often, but with the thunderstorm and all...I was hoping he could stay in my office."  
  
"Is he housebroken?" Garret reached down to scratch him behind the ears.  
  
"Yes sir, fully potty-trained." He grinned up at Garret. "So...is that a yes?" He said, in reply to Garret's nod.  
  
"Yes, he can stay here, but you clean up any mess that thing makes in my morgue, you understand me?"  
  
"Thanks Garret. And have a good night. You too Jordan." He winked at me, which prompted a look from Garret.  
  
We turned and walked out of the hall, got in the elevator, and as soon as the doors closed, he turned to me.  
  
"What was that wink about?" He looked at me, giving me that "fatherly" look he tends to always give.  
  
"That was nothing, just Nigel being Nigel..." I grinned up at him.  
  
"You've been acting alot happier Jordan...care to dish some secrets on your 'bestest girlfriend'?"  
  
I raised an eyebrow, then smiled. "Well, I can tell you one thing...me and Woody...we...you know..." I played around my words, trying to scare him.  
  
"Jordan..." He looked at me, a genuine concerned look in his eyes. "Tell me you didn't..."  
  
"Not that Garret! Not yet at least, but no." I winked at him.  
  
"What then?" He smiled at me.  
  
"We realized that we love each other." I leaned my head on his shoulder. "And it's perfect."  
  
"You sure about this Jordan?" He looked down at me.  
  
"Positive." I smiled back, grinning from ear to ear.  
  
He laid his head on top of mine, and whispered "Congratulations." in my ear, then gently hugged me with one arm.  
  
"Thanks Garret." I whispered back.  
  
The elevator doors slid open, and we walked across the lobby, waved goodnight to the security guard by the door, and walked out into the rainy night. He walked with me to my Explorer, then held my bag while I opened the door. I climbed in, he handed my bag to me, and he nodded.  
  
"I'm happy for you Jordan."  
  
"I know you are. Now go home before you get soaked."  
  
"Goodnight Jordan."  
  
"'Night Garret." I started the engine, waved goodbye, then drove out of the parking lot and towards Dad's house. Poor Nige, I thought to myself, stuck in the morgue all night with Peter and a dog... I laughed, then headed for home.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
***This was longer (i think), and I know, I know, not much W/J, but I had to get Nigel out of my system. Some people were suprised to see a W/J fic out of me, but heck, I had to throw him in...and I had to give him a bulldog. Had to. More to come later!*** 


	6. Chapter 6

***Thanks for reading! And we'll be on our way shortly with our story, but first you'll need to know this...a few weeks have passed, so don't be lost, and this is just getting started!***  
  
((This chapter takes place in the Morgue, and at the Pogue Mahone))  
  
CHAPTER 6:  
  
Jordan, Woody, Max, Peter, Bug, Garret and Lily are all at the Pogue after work, just hanging out, drinking a few beers, and talking.  
  
~~Jordan~~ Wow. These last few weeks have been amazing! Woody's a really great guy...everybody has noticed how he hangs around me more...they probably all think we've been sleeping together or something. None of that yet...I love the way Dad's taken the whole thing. He's been super supportive, but he gives me space to do my own thing too. I wish Woody would get the heck over here and drag himself away from the pool table...  
  
"Scratched again Woody...you sure you know how to play pool?" Garret grabbed the chalk off the wall and chalked up his cue.  
  
"I normally don't suck like this...I must not be able to concentrate..." He looked down at the table.  
  
Garret took aim, then made his shot. "You know, you only do bad when you're shooting towards the bar..." He looked up at me and grinned. "Don't see why that is..."  
  
Woody stared up at me. "I think it's because I can't stop staring at the woman I love so much..." He tried to shoot, but missed the cue ball completly. "Figures."  
  
Peter then walked over. "Go sit next to her buddy...she needs SOMEONE to drink with." He grabbed the stick out of Woody's hand, then turned to Garret. "I'll show you how to really play pool!"  
  
Garret raised an eyebrow at him as Woody walked over to me. "You're on, Winslow." He pulled all the balls out of the pockets and racked them up again. "You break."  
  
Woody walked over and slid onto the stool next to me and smiled at Dad. "A dark please." He nodded, then pulled one out from under the counter and set it in front of Woody.  
  
"Can I see some ID?" He grinned.  
  
"Come on Max...you know I'm old..."  
  
"You ain't that old yet Woodrow, just keeping ya on your toes." He took his hand off the beer and walked over to Bug and Lily who were sitting at a table near the stereo.  
  
Good way to set up for some conversation Dad... I thought to myself. "So, Woody, how was pool?"  
  
He took a drink of his beer. "It was good...I got my ass beat by your boss, but who cares."  
  
I nudged him playfully. "You know Woody, I've very critical in the skills my men must posess." I winked at him. "Only the finest quality ever get to be close to me you know..." I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek.  
  
"I hope I'm doing a good job Jordan..." He kissed me back, then glanced over at Garret, who was attempting not to stare at us. "We're being watched..."  
  
I looked over my shoulder at him, then grabbed the back of his head and kissed him full on the mouth. This'll scare him enough... I thought to myself. Woody was probably in shock, with no advance warning to my whole scare tactic. I glanced up at Garret, only to see him shaking his head and trying not to laugh.  
  
"That should keep them away from us for awhile." I smiled at him.  
  
"But it won't keep away your Dad, Jordan..." He looked over at Max who was walking over to us.  
  
I glanced up, and smiled at Dad. "Hey."  
  
"Hello lovebirds. Need any refills?" He wiped a glass out and set it under the counter.  
  
"No Dad, we're okay." I shoved the empty bottle towards him.  
  
"Alright Sweetheart. If you need anything just ask." He walked back to where Bug and Lily were now watching the pool match between Garret and Peter.  
  
Nigel walked in the door as soon as Max stepped away from the bar, and he went and sat at the end, about 5 seats down from me and Woody. Woody looked at me and whispered "What's with him?" motioning towards Nigel.  
  
"I don't know..." I whispered back, then I stood up and pulled Woody off the stool. "Go watch the game...and tell Dad I'll get Nigel a drink, not to worry about it." I nudged him towards everyone else and nodded. "I'll try to talk to him."  
  
"Alright Jordan." He turned and walked off, and I saw him whisper something to Dad, who looked at me and nodded.  
  
I walked around the back of the bar, and pulled Dad's stool up and sat across from Nigel. He just stared at the bar, not talking.  
  
"Nige? You want anything to drink?" I put my hand on the bar where he was staring.  
  
He looked up at me and sighed. "Double shot of vodka, straight up."  
  
I nodded, poured him the glass, and slid it in front of him. "Everything okay Nige?"  
  
~~Nigel~~ I downed the shot in one gulp, not even wincing as it burned down my throat. No, everything's not okay Jordan...I've been following this murder case for weeks, the poor little kid's still got no name, and I have no leads...but who cares right? People can't be decent enough to give the guy the time of day, people beat on their kids for no reason, and people kill innocent children for no reason in bloody hell...no everything's not okay. I glanced up at her and shrugged, then handed her the glass back. "I'm fine." She poured me another shot, and I took that one just as fast, but it didn't hurt as much this time.  
  
"Listen, Nige...whatever's bugging you...you can tell me about it if you feel like it...I won't tell anyone else." She smiled at me, then took the glass back and poured me another shot, then passed it to me.  
  
"Really Jordan, I'm fine." I gulped down the third shot, then set the glass in front of me.  
  
"No more. At least not now."  
  
She nodded, then folded her arms on the counter and rested her head on them. She looked at me, and smiled weakly. "Something happen to Rudy? Bad day at work?"  
  
I shook my head. "No, just the injustices of the world left untouched. Sometimes I don't know how I can stand working with it."  
  
"Is this about the kid?" She put her hand on my forearm softly. "You can't let that beat you up...it's not good for you."  
  
"I know Jordan, it just makes me so damn mad..." I swallowed hard, feeling the sting of tears in my eyes. I hadn't slept straight through a night in weeks, I was exhausted from staying up pouring over the files and evidence looking for one more detail that I knew I had missed. I couldn't think straight anymore. My waking hours were consumed by countless searches through Missing Persons databases, dental records, hospital admits, everything. I was addicted to solving this case...I had to.  
  
"Nigel...I know this makes you mad but..." She stopped when she felt me start to shake. "Nigel?"  
  
I looked up at her, my eyes watering. "I don't know what to do Jordan..." I stared back down at the empty shotglass on the bar.  
  
"Oh God...Nigel..." She hopped off the stool and walked around the edge of the bar and sat next to me. She put an arm around me and hugged me towards her. "You'll find out who this kid is...I know it. You just have to let yourself free of this...pain..."  
  
I swallowed hard again, then looked over at her. "I don't know how..." I stared slowly down at the bar and shut my eyes. You need to go home mate...you need to sleep...  
  
"You're exhausted. Let me drive you home." She rubbed my back softly.  
  
"I'm fine, I can drive myself." I sat up on the stool and looked in my coat for my keys.  
  
"No, you're not okay. You're shaking for God's sake. I am driving you home. I'll take your truck, drive you home, then catch a cab back." She grabbed my keys from me and stood up off the stool. "Let's go."  
  
She walked over to Max and hugged him, then whispered some stuff in Woody's ear, hugged him, then came back to me. "You ready?"  
  
"Ready as I'll ever be." I turned and walked out of the bar without looking at anyone, and I went and leaned on my truck and tried not to fall over. Jordan came out right behind me, and opened the door for me first, then climbed in the driver's side and started the engine.  
  
"You feeling okay Nige?" She looked over at me.  
  
"Yeah...just tired..." I smiled back at her, and we drove in silence towards my apartment. She parked in the back, and I looked over at her before she got out of the car. "Why not just have Woodrow come and get you...instead of calling a cab?"  
  
She thought about it for a minute, then nodded. "I'll call him. Can I use your phone though? I left mine at the bar."  
  
"Sure, you're always welcome at my place." I climbed out of the truck, up the stairs, and then I walked into my apartment where I was soon attacked by a very lonely bulldog. I nodded towards the phone. "Phone's over there, go ahead and use it."  
  
She looked at me, then knelt down on the floor next to me and started playing with Rudy. "You want to talk some more about the kid's case?"  
  
"Alright. You want a beer or something?" I got up and headed for the kitchen.  
  
"Sure, give me one of whatever you've got."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
***Sorry to leave you hanging again, but I've gotta go to the farm to feed my fat animals, so I'll talk to you all later!*** 


	7. Chapter 7

***I'm on a writing spree! I can't stop! Help! J/K, but yes, here's the next chapter! This story's taking so many twists even I'm confused!***  
  
((This chapter takes place in Nigel's apartment, and driving the streets of Boston.))  
  
CHAPTER 7:  
  
~~Nigel~~ I went and grabbed two beers out of my fridge, shoving the 3-day old chinese take-out to the side, next to the leftover pizza from last night that I picked up after work. I shut the door, and grabbed a couple of dog treats out of the bag on the counter and sat on the floor next to Jordan.  
  
"Here you go, fresh from the fridge." I handed her a beer, then put the treats on the floor in front of Rudy.  
  
"Thanks Nige." She opened it and took a drink, then went back to scratching Rudy behind the ears as he inhaled the treats and proceeded to leave a puddle of drool all over the floor. "You know, this little guy grows on you fast."  
  
"Yeah...I feel kinda bad, these last couple weeks, I haven't paid all that much attention to him. I feed him and walk him and stuff, but I've been so busy with the case that I haven't had time to do much else." I reached over and started scratching his stomach, which prompted his legs to go kicking wildly in every direction.  
  
"He seems happy enough just having you around." She winked at me. "However, I would not suggest having children anytime soon..."  
  
"No worries about that Luv...I told you...I've been BUSY with the case these last few weeks..." I looked over at her.  
  
"No time at ALL for extracurricular activites?" She threw a fake shocked look on her face.  
  
"Nope, not at all. 'Tis a shame, really. But I can't help it, I'm so wrapped up in the bloody thing I can't think about anything else." I took a drink off my beer, then reached up and pulled a file off the table. "You been reviewing this at all?"  
  
"Never looked at it. Were you the Head Examiner on it?" She took it from me and opened it, and started leafing through the pages.  
  
I nodded. "Yeah. Probably why I'm so into solving it...I would do ANYTHING to get information on it."  
  
She looked at me and grinned. "God Nige, you're starting to sound like me all of a sudden..."  
  
He shook his head. "I'm spending too much time with you Jordan...but it may be for the better good."  
  
"Well, I tend to solve cases, so act like me as much as you'd like to." She grinned. "Is he trained to walk on a leash?" While pointing at Rudy, she took another drink off her beer.  
  
"Yeah. He was trained before I got him. The shelter got him after they found him in one of those portable kennels, just sitting on the sidewalk. No collar, no chips, just a normal bulldog sitting there, happy as a clam." I leaned over for a kiss from him. "Poor little guy just got dropped off for anyone to find...huh buddy?" I let him lick me all over the face, then I looked back up at Jordan, who was staring at me in disgust.  
  
"You let him lick you like that?"  
  
"Yeah...why?" I raised an eyebrow at her.  
  
"I thought you said you had no time for extracurriculars..." She winked at me, and all I did was shake my head.  
  
"Jordan, Jordan, Jordan...your dirty mind is amusing me..."  
  
"Well, being that I'm currently taken by a wonderful man...you'll have to wait." She wagged a finger at me.  
  
"So how IS that Woodrow anyways?"  
  
~~Jordan~~ I thought for a minute. Well Nigel, how DO I explain this to you...I'm madly in love with the man of my dreams, I can't get enough of his icey-blue eyes, his strong arms...his freckles...I wish I could spend every minute of my life with him...  
  
"Jordan?" He snapped his fingers in front of my face. "Wake up..."  
  
"Oh, sorry Nige. I was just thinking about how much I love him..." I smiled softly. "He's perfect."  
  
"You sure about this Luv?" He raised an eyebrow. "You ready to commit to him? Are you positive that you're in love with him?"  
  
"Yes Nigel...I am..." He was being just like Garret, only like a brother, not another father figure.  
  
"Alright Jordan. I want you to be happy, but to be safe at the same time...I'm not gonna see you hurt by another guy in your life." He looked down at Rudy, who was now a snoring blob on the carpet.  
  
"Thanks Nige...If it wasn't for you, all this never would have happened..."  
  
"I know Luv, that's what I'm afraid of...I'll be the cause of more pain for you."  
  
"Nigel...don't worry about it." I looked at my watch and sighed. "It's almost midnight, Woody and Dad must be ready to send out the national guard after me..." I stood up and walked over to his phone, then picked up the reciever and dialed the Pogue.  
  
"Pogue Mahone, Max speaking."  
  
"Hey Daddy. It's me."  
  
"Ah, Jordan. We were getting worried about you and Nigel for a minute."  
  
"Sorry dad, we had alot to talk about."  
  
"Everything go alright sweetheart?"  
  
"Yeah Dad, it went good. I was wondering, if Woody could come and pick me up here at Nigel's--I don't really want to pay for a cab back home."  
  
"One minute, lemme ask him."  
  
I heard a muffled conversation in the background, then Dad came back on the line. "He'd be happy to come get you honey. He says he'll be there in ten minutes."  
  
"Thanks Dad, and say thanks to Woody too. I'll see you in a bit."  
  
"Bye Jordan."  
  
"Bye Dad." I hung up the phone, then turned back to Nigel, who was now lying on the couch, with his feet sticking off the end, being sat on by a very sleepy bulldog. I could tell he was nodding off, and I gently shook him awake. "Nige...wake up..."  
  
He nearly fell off the couch when I touched him.  
  
"Go to bed Nige, in your own bed...it'll be better on your back." I nudged him towards his room.  
  
"Woody coming to get you?" He smiled at me as he picked Rudy up off his chest and set him down on the floor.  
  
"Yeah, he'll be here in about 10 minutes. But if you wanna go to sleep, I can let myself out."  
  
"Nah Luv, I can stay up. Besides, no telling what you'd do if you were unsupervised in my apartment ya know..." He winked at me.  
  
"Nigel, I'm shocked. How could you--"  
  
I was cut off by a gentle knock on the door and I got up and opened it, to see a smiling Woody standing there.  
  
"Taxi service!"  
  
I gave him a hug, then turned back to Nigel. "If you need anything, or you want to talk some more, call me okay? I don't care what time it is..."  
  
"Alright Jordan...just go home now...we wouldn't want to keep your cab waiting..." He yawned, then walked over to the door. "Goodnight Woody, and goodnight Jordan."  
  
"Night Nigel. See you at work tomorrow." He nodded, then shut the door.  
  
Woody and I walked down the stairs to his car, and we climbed in, and started driving back to the Pogue. I leaned over and kissed Woody on the cheek, then sat back normally.  
  
"What was that one for Jordan?"  
  
"For coming and getting me." I thought for a minute. "You free for lunch tomorrow?"  
  
He shook his head. "Sadly, I'm not, I have to work all day tomorrow."  
  
"On what?" I slouched down in the seat to get more comfortable.  
  
"I'm assisting in a sting on a suspected heroin dealer. We're running it all day."  
  
"How are you assisting?" I looked up at him.  
  
"Just backup, in case something goes wrong."  
  
"You gonna be alright Wood?"  
  
"Fine Jordan, just fine. It's a basic operation: observe, confirm, move in, and arrest, and process the guy. It'll probably only take a few hours, but the Sarge wants me there bright and early tomorrow." He smiled at me.  
  
"Okay. Just be safe...I don't want my man getting hurt." I placed my hand on his thigh.  
  
"I won't Jordan, I promise you." He nodded. "So, how were things with our friendly neighborhood Brit?"  
  
"They were okay. He's been getting really shook up about the case he's working right now."  
  
"Which one's that?" He glanced over at me, then back to the traffic in front of him.  
  
"The little boy that they found a few weeks ago in that alley. No name, signs of abuse, the usual. It's been hitting him pretty hard lately."  
  
"Does he normally get that worked up over a case?"  
  
"Not usually, he's just really getting mad about this one. He can't get any breaks in it."  
  
He paused. "Jordan...was he crying, back there at the Pogue?" We stopped at a red light, and Woody looked over at me.  
  
"Yeah, he was...just out of exhaustion though. He hasn't slept good since he got put on the case."  
  
"I thought so...so did Garret. He seemed really concerned for him."  
  
"Garret's great--he gets concerned about everybody."  
  
"I know, you're lucky to work with him." He smiled, then we pulled into the parking lot of the Pogue, and he put the car in park, but left it running. "I'd love to come back in, but I've gotta be at the plaza early tomorrow."  
  
"Alright...be safe, okay farmboy?" I leaned over and gave him a soft kiss on the lips, then I got out of the car, and went to walk inside. I waved goodbye, then walked in.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***Thanks for reading! And tomorrow, I probably wont post anything until late, I'm going to the beach w/ my mom all day, but I hope this makes up for it! I'll have more Woody and Jordan action for you next chapter! 


	8. Chapter 8

***Thanks for waiting, I got sunburned pretty bad, and I've just now beaten my evil computer into submission, so here we go!***  
  
CHAPTER 8:  
  
((This chapter has most of the characters, and lots of Woody/Jordan action in it! And it's the next day from chapter 7))  
  
~~Woody~~ Today's the big day...Sarge has been making us all be extra careful in preparation for the sting...so I'll be fine. We've got lines tapped, camera's set up, and plenty of backup ready to roll in. I feel kinda bad for telling Jordan I was just being backup for this thing. She was really concerned, even at that. She doesn't need to know...she'd just freak out more. I pulled on a pair of jeans, and then an undershirt. I eyed the bulletproof vest sitting on the bench next to me. Sarge wants us all to wear them...but the damn things are so uncomfortable.  
  
"Hey Hoyt."  
  
I looked up to see Eric standing over me. "Yeah Johnson?"  
  
"You gonna wear your vest?"  
  
"I was thinking about it. You wearing yours?"  
  
"Of course Woody..." he tapped his chest. "...I've got Lisa and the girls at home...daddy can't get hurt."  
  
"Yeah. I suppose I will wear it..." I eyed the vest and sighed. "I can't get hurt either."  
  
"You got a girl yet? Is it that hot M.E.?" He pretended to sock me on the shoulder. "Make a move on her man...she's a fine piece of girl...if you know what I mean."  
  
"Yeah, I know what you mean, Eric." I pulled the vest over my head, and strapped it into place. "You ready?"  
  
"Ready to catch that bastard? Hell yeah I am!" He grabbed his gun and slid it into the shoulder holster. "We've got a brief in 5 minutes."  
  
"Alright. I'll be there." I watched as we walked out of the locker room, then I buttoned a shirt up over the vest, grabbed my gun, and followed him into the briefing room. This was gonna be a piece of cake.  
  
~~Jordan~~  
  
"Bug? I need those prints in my box as soon as you can get them. Have you seen Nigel around?"  
  
"No, I don't think he's here yet. Garret's about to hit the roof--Rene's trying to get evidence that we still should have rights to."  
  
"She's messing with him this early?!" I glared at him. "You have got to be kidding me."  
  
"Nope, the Wicked Witch still lives on." He grabbed a file of my desk and started flipping through it. "What have we got to do today?"  
  
I took it back. "I'm going to be doing paperwork on the woman we got last week. Missing Persons called, and we got an ID. Next of kin's gonna pick her up this afternoon."  
  
"Great! Need me to sign anything?" He looked around for a pen.  
  
"Yeah, just sign her off when the daughter gets here will ya?" I handed him a stack of papers. "You're so eager, you can do these."  
  
"Alright Jordan. You win." Bug grabbed the papers from me, then walked off towards his office.  
  
I sat around for about 15 minutes until Nigel poked his head in the door, holding a brown paper bag.  
  
"Got a minute Jordan?"  
  
I looked up at him. "For breakfast? Nope."  
  
He came in and put the bag in front of me on my desk, then sat in the rolling chair and came over next to me. "Not breakfast Love..." He nudged the bag towards me. "Open it."  
  
"Is this some kind of joke?" I looked in the bag and saw a half-smoked cigar lying in the bottom. "Why do you have this?"  
  
"I went back to where they found that kid, and I looked over the scene again, and I found this." He grinned at me. "And you want to know the best part?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"It's got DNA that matches two sources on it."  
  
"Who's is it?"  
  
"One of them matches the kid, and one strain is an unknown. Whoever's that is...they were with the kid the night he died." He took the bag back, then nodded. "I'm gonna find him. You just watch."  
  
~~Woody~~ I looked at the house out of the back of the surveilance van windows. The guy was home alright--lights on, TV blaring. We'd been sitting in front of the house down the street for about three hours, just watching to make sure he didn't leave. Now was our chance to make our move...someone had just pulled up and entered the house from the side door. I readjusted the earpiece I had on and listened to the quiet converstation being whispered back and forth between the vans we had surrounding the house. I heard the call to be ready to move in at the signal, so I checked to be sure my gun was loaded, then I sat nervously, ready to jump out of the van and bust this guy for good.  
  
Suddenly, the radio crackled to life, with a clear-cut order to move in on the house. We busted out of the van and raced up to the door, kicking through the screen door, and busting into the house. Everyone was yelling, and I heard gunshots from the back room of the house. I ran towards the back, and saw someone go running downstairs into the basement, so I followed him, jumping down the wooden stairs, straight into the darkness. It took about a minute for my eyes to adjust, and my nose cringed at the smell of gas and chemicals that hit my nose. My eyes started watering, and I yelled for someone to call a HAZ-MAT truck in here. I saw a shadow dart across the room, follwed by the flash and crack of a gunshot, which I felt fly by my head. I naturally ducked, and then I was hit in the back of the head with what felt like a piece of a hockey stick. I reeled around to find myself face to face with a guy pointing a gun at my chest, grinning evily.  
  
I tightened my grip on my gun. "Put it down buddy. I'm not afraid to shoot you."  
  
"Neither am I." He aimed down at my leg and fired, sending a bullet tearing through my thigh. I dropped to the floor in pain, clutching my gun while doing so.  
  
I screamed into my radio. "SOMEONE GET THEIR ASS DOWN HERE AND HELP ME!!!"  
  
The suspect only laughed, then pistol-whipped me across my face. I tasted blood in my mouth, then I managed to pull myself up by clinging to a box that was covered in gasoline. I don't know how it hadn't exploded yet. I grabbed my gun and raised it at him, my hand shaking.  
  
"You think you're gonna be able to shoot me?" He fired five or six shots into my chest, knocking the wind out of me, then he grabbed my gun. "I think we should use your gun for the kill shot...don't you think?"  
  
"Go to Hell!" I rolled over and tried to breathe, spitting out blood.  
  
"Alright." He grabbed several tubes that he had running to a meth kit and pulled them out, sending gasoline and chemicals spraying everywhere, including on himself. "We'll go to hell." He grabbed the hockey stick again and brought it down, hard, on the side of my head. I instantly blacked out, and was sent flying into a vivid whirlwind of memories.  
  
You've done it now...farmboy... I heard that haunting voice come into my head, followed by an image of Jordan, clutching a gun, aimed straight at me. "Jordan...what did I do?" She grinned at me. "You made me think that I loved you, then you leave me here to live in this Hell..." I grabbed up towards her, then she fired the gun straight at me. I screamed out, not knowing what else to do.  
  
I felt a blast of flame sear across my body, and I glanced up to see the suspect shoot himself dead. He had shot the tank of gasoline, and I tried to pull myself up and get out of the basement, but I couldn't. My legs were pinned under a heavy tank that had fallen across them. My radio was dead, and I could hear shouting from above: "Everyone out! Get out now! The place is going to explode!" It was silent for about 30 seconds, and I looked up to see a can of nitroglycerine teetering towards the edge of the flames. I watched and held my breath as it leaned closer, and closer, and closer, and then I saw it fall into the flames, sending a huge explosion ripping through the house, sending me flying into a concrete wall. I felt and heard bones snap like twigs, and then I glanced up to see a wall of fire collapse the floor above, sending it crashing down towards me. I tried to scream, but I couldn't. The last thing I saw was fire, then--nothing.  
  
~~Garret~~ I was sitting on the phone, listening to this bitch complain about the morgue's policy's, when Nigel came bursting into my office.  
  
"Mate, turn on the TV!"  
  
"Nigel...I'm on the phone...can't this wait?"  
  
He grabbed the remote and clicked on the TV in the corner of the room, where the screen was filled with the image of a burning building, surrounded by squad cars, fire trucks, HAZ-MAT vehicles, and helicopters hovering overhead. He turned up the volume, and sat staring at the screen.  
  
"Reports are indicating that this house was the site of a heroin dealing site and a lab where methanphetamines were being produced. No word yet on any injuries, but police were in the middle of a raid on this house when an explosion in the basement triggered a complete collapse of the building. We'll continue coverage and pass on details as we get them." The news cut to a commercial, and we both turned around to see Bug, Lily, Peter, and Jordan standing in the doorway staring at the TV. Jordan was holding onto the doorway to keep herself standing, so I jumped up and grabbed her, before she fell.  
  
"Jordan--what's wrong?" I grabbed her, and Nigel pushed a chair in my direction.  
  
She stared and the screen and started shaking. "Woody..."  
  
Nigel glanced back at the screen, and let out a low gasp. "Oh my God."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***I KNOW, I KNOW, the lynch mobs are going to be running rampant tonight! I have some support on this, so be prepared to fend off a wild steer with his owner who is very handy with a shovel!*** 


	9. Chapter 9

***People, thanks for reading, and not lynching me. Since I'm not gonna be on tomorrow, I'll post chapter 9 tonight. This story has taken so many twists, even I can't explain it to myself. Happy reading!***  
  
((Mainly takes place in the Morgue, right after the explosion.))  
  
CHAPTER 9:  
  
~~Jordan~~ This can't be happening...Woody was doing backup on this raid. Woody can't be hurt. He has to be okay. He has to be. I grabbed weakly at the chair that Nigel slid in front of me, and I sank into it, completely shaking. Garret was rubbing my shoulders and trying to get me to calm down, while Nigel was on the phone in the hall trying to call the Police Plaza to get any information he could. All I could do was stare at the image of the burning house, seeing the thick black smoke filling the clear sky. This can't be happening...  
  
"Jordan, you have got to say something." Garret was leaning down in front of me and staring straight into my face. "Come on...say anything...please Jordan."  
  
I glanced up at him and bit my lip. "What can I say Garret?" I was trying not to cry.  
  
"I just don't want you going into one word answers. I don't care what you say." He gently rubbed my forearms while I stared at the TV silently.  
  
"Where did Nigel and Lily go?" I glanced slowly around the room.  
  
"Lily's on the phone with the police now, and Nigel went to go search for information in the police databases...Nigel figured Lily was the better talker." He smiled at me. "We're going to get information soon."  
  
I nodded, then looked back at the TV. The reporter lady was back, but standing on the side of the building. I turned up the sound and listened to her.  
  
"We are now getting the first reports on injuries and the impact that this explosion has caused. We have been informed that several officers were injured in the explosion, and one officer and the suspect are still not accounted for. Police are not releasing the name of the missing officer or the suspect at this time." She cut away to show the building, a gaping hole missing from it's side. "As you can see, this explosion was caused by various chemical compunds, and HAZ-MAT teams are on the site now to evaluate the danger posed to the community."  
  
~~Garret~~ I glanced at Jordan, then to the TV. I bent my head down and prayed to myself silently. God, please don't let him be in trouble...for Jordan's sake... I looked back up to see Jordan shaking, letting little sniffs escape from her voice. I sat in the chair next to her, and I reached over and gently tried to hug her, which prompted an immediate clutching grasp that she locked onto me with, then she broke down sobbing in my arms. "Jordan...it's okay baby...I gently held her while she cried, trying to calm her down. She's not ready to lose you Woody...don't let yourself be lost...  
  
"Garret? I...uh...need to talk to you for a moment." Nigel peeked his head in the door and looked down at Jordan nervously.  
  
I nodded, then whispered in Jordan's ear. "Jordan, can I go talk to Nigel for a minute, then I'll be right back..."  
  
She nodded, so I stood and walked out of the room, and into Nigel's office where he was blankly staring at his computer screen.  
  
"Yeah Nige?" I looked at him, already knowing what he was going to say.  
  
"Woodrow's the one missing Garret. And they've sent out a call for us to come assist in finding him..." He looked up at me. "We can't let Jordan come."  
  
He nodded. "You and me will go. I'll hand Chief to Jordan while we go look for him. Bug and Peter can make sure she doesn't leave, I'll have Lily try to calm her down."  
  
"You know she's gonna try and throttle you Mate..." he stood up in his chair and walked over to the window that looked into my office.  
  
"I know, but it's for her own good. We're gonna get stuck with the autospy too...unfortunately. And if worse comes to worse, we're going to have him in the crypt sometime in the next 10 hours..." I rubbed the back of my neck. "Nigel, get the scene bags, lots of gloves, and get the bodybags. I have a fear we're going to need them."  
  
"Alright." He walked down the hall to the supply room, while I went back in and grabbed my coat and keys, then grabbed Jordan's out of her coat which was hanging on my door.  
  
"Garret? Where are you going?" She stood out of her chair.  
  
"Me and Nigel have been requested to process the scene at that house." I motioned towards the TV. "And I'm handing Chief down to you while I'm gone. You are not to leave this building--Peter and Bug will make sure of that. You are going to talk to Lily and calm yourself down. Understand?" I looked at her shocked face. "I'm dead serious Jordan. You are NOT to leave this building."  
  
"Garret, please, just let me--"  
  
"No Jordan. For your own sake no. Me or Nigel will call you when we get information. I promise."  
  
"Alright." She sat down in my chair and glared at me.  
  
I walked out of the office, and grabbed Peter and Bug as they went walking down the hall.  
  
"Do NOT allow her to leave this office. I don't want her in the elevator, the stairwell, or anywhere near the roof, understand me?"  
  
They both nodded in unison. "We understand."  
  
"Good. If she shows up at that crime scene, you will both have Hell to pay." With that, I turned and bumped into Nigel who was carrying a bag full of equipment, and a case with the camera in it.  
  
"Ready Dr. Macy?"  
  
"Yes, let's go." We walked down the hall, into the elevator, then down out into the lobby, where we nodded at the receptionist who gave us odd looks.  
  
*****NOW WE'RE AT THE HOUSE*****  
  
~~Nigel~~ The place was an absolute mess...rubble everywhere, smoke. The fire was out now, so all we had to do was wait for the "all-clear" that it was safe to enter, and then we had to go find Woody and the suspect. Garret's over there talking to the police, trying to get an idea of what actually went down. Well, the firefighters are coming out of the building now, so we should be able to go in pretty soon.  
  
"Well, the cops said that everything seemed to be working, and the last place they saw Woody was heading into the basement after the suspect." Garret walked over to me and took a drink off of a bottle of water he was carrying. "You and me are going to need to work together on this. We're needed to find and ID the bodies, and then get them out and take them back to the morgue."  
  
I nodded. "You think we're going to be able to find him?"  
  
"I have a feeling we will, but it isn't going to be pretty." He shook his head. "Jordan is going to freak out."  
  
"I know Mate...we should call Max and get him over to the Morgue."  
  
"We'll call him after we've found him, just to be sure."  
  
"Hey Macy! You and your guy can go in now!" A cop standing by the door yelled at us.  
  
"Alright buddy, thanks!" We gathered up the stuff and donned protective gear, masks and helmets, and started for the basement.  
  
When we got down there, I had to cover my eyes with my hand--there was so much smoke that still hadn't cleared out. Garret coughed a few times, then walked over to a charred body lying on the floor, next to what appeared to be the remaints of a gun.  
  
He pulled out the camera and started snapping photos, then he turned the body over gently and shook his head. "Nigel, come here and look at this."  
  
I looked, and nodded. "It isn't Woody." I turned around slowly and saw the pile of rubble that had fallen from above. I noted the blast pattern that the initial explosion had left on the walls, and I walked towards the pile of broken concrete and slightly charred wood, which I photographed and then tried to lift, with no sucess. "Garret, can you give me a hand with this?"  
  
He walked over and nodded. "Sure." He counted to three, then we lifted the heavy section of flooring off the pile and flung it to the ground.  
  
"What in the bloody hell..." I stared blankly at the body in front of us.  
  
"That's impossible." Garret shook his head several times, then looked over at me. "It's not possible..."  
  
"He's not even burnt..." I stared down at Woodrow's body, completely intact, no burns, only a little dirt and mud caking on his skin. "You have got to be kidding me..."  
  
Garret grabbed the camera and snapped a few primary photos, then gently knelt down and started to clear the broken concrete blocks away from his body. "The bricks protected him from the flames...  
  
I leaned down and started to pull some of the wood pieces away, clearing off his body. Once we had it uncovered, Garret took a few more photos, then looked up at me. "Put him in the body bag, I'll go and get a stretcher to carry him out on." He rose slowly, and after one more look at him, turned and walked out.  
  
I slowly unzipped the bag, not thinking about what I was doing. This was Woody...the same Woody that was dancing with Jordan a few nights ago in the Pogue. The same Woody that couldn't grow a backbone if he tried. The Woody that Jordan was falling for...I bit my lip and gently picked up his body, placing it slowly in the bag, and closing it, taking one last look at his face. Garret came back carrying a stretcher under one arm, and he nodded when he saw the bag lying on the ground.  
  
"Garret, help me get him on the stretcher..."  
  
He nodded, then laid it down next to the bag and helped me slide it onto the stretcher.  
  
"Let's carry him out first, we can come back for the other guy." We slowly walked out past the other officers that had crowded around the door to the house, and they all looked at us, and they bowed their heads as we passed. We placed the body in the back of the van, then we headed back in for the other guy, which we took out in the same fashion, except the cops didn't give the bag a second glance. After they were both in the van, we spoke briefly to the police chief about what we were going to do with the body, and then we got in the van for the drive back to the Morgue.  
  
When we got there, Garret just turned off the ignition and rested his forehead on the steering wheel. "Nigel...what are we going to do about this?"  
  
"I have no clue...I know she considers us like brothers, but, I don't think she'll even talk to us. I doubt Max will get anything out of her."  
  
"We just need to get her through this..." He softly hit his head on the steering wheel a few times, then looked up at me. "We can't let her be alone. Ever."  
  
"I know. I'm afraid she'll run again...Max couldn't stop her the first time she did..." I rested my hand on Garret's back. "We're gonna have to double- team her Mate...like big brother's are known for doing..."  
  
"Yeah, but I'm just afraid to go in there, you know Nigel?" He looked up at me. "She's going to be a mess..."  
  
"Yes, she will be, but we're going to get her through this. I don't know how, but we are." I smiled at him weakly. "If we can survive the first 12 hours, she won't try and kill us after that..."  
  
"You're probably right about that." He paused, then motioned towards the back of the van. "Let's get them inside."  
  
We went around back, and gently placed the bodies on gurneys and wheeled them into the crypt elevator. The doors slid shut, and Garret glanced at me as he pushed the button to go up. "Ready?"  
  
"Ready as I'll ever be." I held onto the edge of the gurney as we started for the floor of the Morgue, and I nodded to myself. Prepare for the wrath of Jordan...  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***Thanks for reading, and I'll post more later!*** 


	10. Chapter 10

***Well, this ride has been quite interesting, I may have to get my driver's brain checked, but heck, I just type what pools inside my little brain! Not my fault! LOL, anyways, thanks for reading, and let's get on with the story!***  
  
((This chapter takes place in the Morgue. You'll figure it out soon enough.))  
  
CHAPTER 10:  
  
~~Garret~~ As we rode up in the elevator, all I could think about was how we were going to get past my office without being attacked by Jordan. As soon as she sees two gurneys...she's gonna flip out... The elevator slowly stopped, and I looked over at Nigel, who had become considerably shaken since we got into the elevator. "You alright Nigel?" I walked over and slid the doors open.  
  
"Yeah...I'm just tripping out, thats all...I can't believe we're bringing Woodrow in here...like this..." He pushed his gurney out into the crypt.  
  
I slid the doors shut and looked through the doors that led to the hallway and made sure Jordan was nowhere to be seen. "Put the suspect in drawer tweleve. We'll take Woody straight to Exam Five, and try to avoid Jordan. If I can grab Peter or Bug on the way, we'll tell them not to let her anywhere near Exam Five, that way we can do his autopsy fast, hopefully before she realizes it's him we're working on. I'm pretty sure that it'll be all over the news in a matter of minutes, and we're gonna have to deal with her soon enough."  
  
He nodded, then slid the bodybag containing the suspect into the drawer, then he grabbed one end of the gurney with Woody on it. "Let's go. Exam Five right?"  
  
"Yeah, Exam Five." I grabbed my end, and we started pushing the gurney down the hall, passing the other exam rooms, and then coming up on my office, where I glanced in and locked eyes with Jordan. She instantly stood up and looked down at the bodybag on the gurney, throwing her hand to her mouth and shaking her head. Crap...here it comes...  
  
"Peter! Come here right now!" I saw him bent over a microscope in toxicology.  
  
He jerked his head up, and when he saw the look on my face, he nearly came running. "Yes Dr. Macy?"  
  
"Take this body to Exam Five, but do not do anything with it. I'm going to autospy him myself." I glared at him, then shut my eyes when I realized I was snapping at him. I opened them again and shook my head. "I'm sorry Peter, just...go in there and have Nigel tell you what's going on...if you can't already guess."  
  
"I can guess, Dr. Macy." He took my end of the stretcher, and gently started off with Nigel, while I turned and walked into my office.  
  
When I got in, and looked at Lily, who was sitting across from where Jordan had been sitting. Jordan was over by the window now, and I glanced up at her while speaking to Lily. "Does she know?"  
  
"That it's him Dr. Macy?"  
  
"Yeah, that it's him. Does she?"  
  
"Yeah, the police chief just came on the TV and issued a statement. She wasn't believing him until she saw you and Nigel with the gurney...then she walked over there..." She motioned towards the window.  
  
"Alright. Could you leave us along for a few minutes?"  
  
"Of course, Garret." She quickly stood and walked out of the room, and I took one more glance at Jordan before I walked over and stood behind her.  
  
"Jordan..." I paused, having no idea what to say to her. "Baby...I'm so sorry..."  
  
She turned around and looked at me, her eyes filling with tears. "It's not happening...I'm just imagining this..." She bit her bottom lip and shook her head. "It's not real..."  
  
"Jordan, it is real. He's gone." I gently reached and embraced her, and listened as she broke down sobbing, muttering various curses at me.  
  
"No. He's not dead. He's going walk in this room any minute and say that he's alright, and that he stayed safe like he promised he would." She looked up at me. "You were pushing the suspect's body on that gurney..."  
  
"Jordan. It was him. I saw his body myself...I know this is hard on you but, it's him."  
  
"NO IT'S NOT!" She screamed at me, then shoved me away and ran to the other side of my desk, glancing at the door. "You're lying to me Garret."  
  
I took a few steps forwards, then paused when I saw her eyes dart to the door again.  
  
"Jordan. I swear I'm not lying to you...I'm being honest, no matter how hard it is for you to believe." I walked closer to her. "Please, don't do this to yourself. You're only making it harder."  
  
She grabbed at the door handle, and flung the door open and ran down the hall towards the exam room. I ran after her, and when I saw Peter come out of them exam room. He got this look on his face that meant she couldn't go in there...not now...  
  
She busted into the exam room and froze when she saw Nigel standing over Woody's body. She sank to the floor and started shaking. Nigel set the camera down quickly and pulled off his mask and grabbed her shoulders, while I was only seconds behind her into the room. I saw Woody's body on the table, then I knelt on the floor and pulled Jordan's chin up so I could look in her eyes.  
  
"Jordan?"  
  
She had that glazed look again.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
**thanks, I know its short, but hey, who cares.** 


	11. Chapter 11

***Sorry last chapter was so short, I got beaten off my computer by a very annoying little sister, and I had to go. Here's chapter 11!***  
  
CHAPTER 11:  
  
((Right after 10, same time, same place.))  
  
~~Garret~~ Dammit! She's got that look again...I know that has to be what Max was talking about. I need to get ahold of him. He needs to get down here right away.  
  
"Nigel, I need you to stay here with Jordan. I need to go call Max." I lifted Jordan's chin again, but she wouldn't make eye contact with me. "Jordan, I'm gonna call your Dad and have him come down here to get you alright?" I slowly stood up, and pulled Jordan to her feet as well. "Nigel?"  
  
"Yes Garret?"  
  
"Take Jordan into my office, have her sit down somewhere, and stay with her. You don't have to get her to talk, just sit with her, okay?"  
  
"Sure thing." He gently put his arm over Jordan's shoulder, and led her out of the room and towards my office.  
  
"Peter? Could you come back in here please?" I leaned my head out the door and looked at him.  
  
"Yes Dr. Macy?" He had a file in his hand.  
  
"Cover up Woody's body please, I'll be back in to autopsy it as soon as Max gets down here to get Jordan."  
  
"Dr. Macy, is Jordan going to be alright?" He looked at me anxiously.  
  
"Emotionally, not for a long time. But physically, she'll be fine." I paused and looked towards my office. "She's gonna be hurting for a while...a long while..."  
  
"Okay. I'll cover the body for you now." He turned and walked into the exam room, and I turned and headed for the phone on Lily's desk.  
  
I picked it up and dialed the number for the Pogue, which for some reason I knew off the top of my head. I heard Max pick up on the other end of the line, so I swallowed hard and spoke.  
  
"Hi Max. It's Garret."  
  
"Hi Garret. What's up?"  
  
"I'm calling about Jordan...have you seen the news yet today?" I nervously tapped a pen on the countertop.  
  
"No, I've been showing the game all day...is Jordan in trouble?" His voice immediately fell.  
  
"Well, not her specifically, but...I don't know how to say this Max..."  
  
"What happened Garret? Is she hurt?"  
  
"Woody's dead Max."  
  
It was silent for several seconds. "You're kidding right?" He was in shock, like I had been only an hour ago.  
  
"I wish I was. Something went wrong with a sting they were running and..."  
  
"Oh my God...you're serious." he paused for a minute.  
  
"I was wondering if you could come down here and be with Jordan right now...she's pretty freaked out."  
  
"Is she talking at all?"  
  
"No...I'm afraid not. She's in my office right now, with Nigel. She ran into the exam room before we could stop her...she saw him on the table." I winced when I heard myself say it.  
  
"I'll be right over. I can have the new kid take over for a while."  
  
"Thanks Max. I really hate to bother you with this..."  
  
"Garret, she's my daughter. I need to be there. I'll see you in a few minutes."  
  
"Alright Max. See you in a few." I heard him hang up the phone, so I did the same thing and walked back into my office, where I saw a very shocked Nigel rubbing the side of his jaw.  
  
"Nigel?" I raised an eyebrow at him.  
  
"She's still awake enough to give you a good one upside the head if she wants to, Mate." He opened his mouth and wiggled his jaw around. "Damn that stings..."  
  
"She slapped you? Why?"  
  
"I told her I was sorry about Woody, and she just let one fly at me."  
  
"Like you said Nigel...after 12 hours, she won't try and kill us."  
  
"It's gonna be hard living those 12 hours at the rate I'm going at. I'll be unconsious by the afternoon." He looked back at Jordan, who was sitting, unmoving on my couch.  
  
"Max is on his way down right now. He'll probably get here in a half an hour."  
  
"That's a good thing." He looked up at me. "You tell him?"  
  
I nodded. "Yeah, I did. He didn't believe me at first, but after the initial shock, he said he'd be down here."  
  
Nigel nodded, and we waited in silence for Max to arrive. When he did, he slowly walked into the room and sighed when he saw Jordan.  
  
"Oh God...Baby girl..." He sat down on the couch next to her and put one arm around her, and just held her.  
  
"Daddy...Woody..." She looked up at him, her eyes filling with tears again.  
  
"I know sweetheart, I know." He held her closer to him, and she instantly broke down into a sobbing wreck.  
  
Me and Nigel both stood up at the same time and walked out of the office to give them a few minutes to be alone. Nigel walked off towards his office, and I stood in the center of the hallway for a minute, unsure of where to go myself. I need somewhere to think... It was getting dark, and I headed to the roof.  
  
When I got up there, I just stood by the edge, staring out over the city. How can a place so beautiful be so damn hard to live in? I placed my arms on the edge of the wall and leaned on it, sighing deeply. I had no idea how I was going to help Jordan with this. I mean, I had been hurt before, like when Maggie and I split up...but nothing compares to losing someone close to you. Nothing.  
  
I was so absored in my own thoughts that I didn't even here Nigel come up behind me.  
  
"You alright Garret?" He stood up next to me and looked out into the distance. I sat silently for a minute, deciding what to answer him with. "No Nigel, I'm not." Better to be honest.  
  
"Glad to know I've got someone in the same boat that I'm in..." He rested his forehead on the edge of the wall and closed his eyes. "I'm so lost right now Garret..."  
  
I looked over at him. "So am I Nige." I sank down and sat on the rooftop, my back to the wall on the edge. "I have no idea what to do with Jordan...I want to help her get through this, but I don't know how..."  
  
Nigel sat on the ground next to me and nodded. "I don't know either. I don't even know how I'm gonna bring myself to autopsy Woodrow in there." He shook his head to himself. "We're not supposed to do this to our own people Garret..."  
  
"I know Nigel. I'm doubting myself a little. We're professionals, but doing this on someone that we know...and that Jordan's in love with--it's gonna be tough."  
  
He nodded, and we both just sat there, absorbed in thought. I don't know how long we were up there, but I just remember bits and pieces of casual conversation about what we had to do. We had to do an autopsy on Woody. And it wasn't going to be easy.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***Thanks for reading, hope this makes up for the shortness of chapter 10!*** 


	12. Chapter 12

***It's currently 1:32 AM, and I have an urge to write. I can't sleep. My computer is being stupid, so I'm going to type straight into this little box. Let's go!***  
  
((During the night, Jordan has gone home with Max, Nigel and Garret are about to do the autopsy on Woody.))  
  
CHAPTER 12:  
  
~~Garret~~ I've got the gloves...I've got all the instruments, I've got the camera, the syringes, the towels. Now all I need is the strength to do this.  
  
"Garret? You ready?" Nigel grabbed a towel and laid it next to the edge of Woody's chest.  
  
"Yes." I switched on my headset-mike. "This is Dr. Garret Macy, performing the autospy on Detective Woodrow Hoyt, assisted by Dr. Nigel Townsend." I reached for the camera and snapped several photos of the leg wound that he had sustained from what appeared to be a gunshot. "Nigel, get a pair of forceps and try to get that bullet out of his leg." He nodded, then gently began probing the wound, picking out fragments from the shell casing.  
  
I moved up towards his chest, and took some pictures of it. "Victim appears to have six bruises in the chest area, confirmed to be from six shots fired into bulletproof vest. The bullets were recovered from the vest and processed into evidence."  
  
"Garret? The bullet in his leg fractured his femur in several places."  
  
"Thank you Nigel."  
  
"From the looks of the internal hemmoraging around the entry site, this was when he was still alive."  
  
I nodded, then opened Woody's mouth and placed a scope down, so I could see his throat. "Evidence of bruising around the gumline and left cheek, possible from impact with an inaminate object, such as a gun, or a bat. From scope imaging, confirmed smoke inhalation into lungs and throat area, nostils also appear to be irritated."  
  
"I've got the x-rays of his skull back." Nigel snapped them up onto the lightboard and flicked it on. "He got whacked pretty hard by something solid...his skull was fractured in two places...had a pretty bad concussion."  
  
I pointed at the films. "Doesn't this look like a square object that inflicted this...maybe a piece of wood or a metal piece?"  
  
Nigel measured the distance with his fingers. "Probably was a hockey stick. That's what I would think it was..."  
  
"How you know that?"  
  
"I played hockey before I came over here to the States...a little amateur league they had set up back home." He nodded. "He's got fragments of whatever he got hit with embedded in the back of his head."  
  
I lifted his head gently, then grabbed at the slivers with a pair of tweezers. I had to yank pretty hard to get them out, and I had to look away a few times while doing it. "These were done while he was still alive, they've caked into his scalp."  
  
"Sweet Nancy...you see this chunk sticking out of his neck?" Nigel gently wiggled a piece of wood out of the neck, and laid it down to photograph it on the table. "This is at least four inches long."  
  
"Was it in his carotid?" I glanced down at the chunk of wood.  
  
"Yeah, in there pretty deep."  
  
"That's what killed him probably." I gently opened the wound on his neck and probed in it. "Yep, straight through. Poor guy bled to death."  
  
I saw Nigel visibly flinch and turn away from the body. "I'm sorry Mate, it's just..."  
  
"I know Nigel. Don't worry about it." Inside, I was feeling the same way. Sick inside, my heart was completely torn out of my chest, my brain racking with how I needed to help Jordan, how I needed to finish this autopsy.  
  
"We know what got him...what else do we need to do?" Nigel looked back at me, then down at the body.  
  
"We're done. Let me just close up these incisions, and we can be done." I grabbed a suture needle, threaded it, and quickly closed the wounds. Nigel collected the instruments and wrapped them up in a towel, and put them off to the side to be sterilized. He snapped off his gloves, and then threw them into the trashcan softly. I switched off my mike, and placed it on the counter. "You alright Nigel?"  
  
He shook his head. "I don't ever want to do anything like that again..."  
  
"I understand." I pulled off my gloves, and threw them away, then covered up the body and started pushing it back into the crypt. Nigel grabbed the other end, and when we got there, he helped me slide him into a drawer, then we both walked out.  
  
I went straight into my office, and I sank down in my chair, and started signing the necessary paperwork that I needed to sign. I probably sat there for a good fifteen minutes by myself, signing the damn things, when Nigel walked in, holding two cups of coffee.  
  
"Want some Boss?" He set them both down on my desk.  
  
"Sure Nigel." I grabbed a cup and slowly sipped it, and Nigel left his there and flopped onto my couch, his feet sticking off the end. "Feeling any better?"  
  
"A little. I'm feeling kind of bad about Rudy though. I wasn't planning on leaving him alone tonight. I've been being alot better about staying with him lately..." He closed his eyes. "He'll be alright for now."  
  
"I would let you leave Nigel, but you know policy. Gotta have two people at all times..." I glanced up at him, then reached in my bottom drawer and pulled out a bottle of scotch, and two shotglasses.  
  
He looked over at me. "I thought you had something in there..."  
  
I poured both of them full, then slid one to the edge of the desk. "Here."  
  
"Thanks Mate." He took it, and downed it in one swallow. "I needed that."  
  
"I think we both needed that." I glanced back down at the stack of papers I had on my desk, and I grabbed a pen and started signing them.  
  
All I need now is for Nigel to sign these papers...and I'll be done with this whole stack... I glanced up and looked at my couch, while I was about to say something to him, but I noticed he was asleep. How long have I been signing these damn things... I glanced up at the clock. 2:35 AM...it was about midnight when we started to autopsy...so it had been awhile. I thought about it for a minute, then decided to let him sleep. He needs it...I do too...If I went to sleep now, I'd be up before anyone else gets here... I laid my head down on my desk on top of my arms, and it was only seconds before I pretty much passed out.  
  
***Later that Morning...around 6-ish***  
  
~~Nigel~~ Damn...why am I so sore...this isn't normal for me to be this sore...at least after a night at work... I blinked a few times, then rolled over and off of the couch, hitting the floor with a thud. "God damn son of a bitch..." I was about to say something else, but I saw Garret looking at me with one eye, his head still resting on his arms.  
  
"Good morning Nigel." He grinned at me.  
  
"Morning Garret. Although, I wouldn't call this exactly a good morning though...not so far at least." I stayed put on the floor, suprisingly, it was beginning to be very comfortable.  
  
Lily walked into the room, and stopped at the doorway, very confused. "Good Morning Dr. Macy...and good morning Nigel...why are you on the floor?"  
  
"I had a fight with the couch and lost." I groaned when I tried to roll over onto my back. That hurts...  
  
"Good Morning Lily. We aren't quite awake yet, as you can tell." Garret leaned back in his chair and stretched. "We pulled a long night..."  
  
"Did you do the autopsy yet?" She started playing with the pen hanging around her neck.  
  
"Yeah, we did. Everything's all signed and ready to go." He handed her a stack of papers.  
  
"I need Nigel to sign this one though." She pulled one of the papers off the stack and waved it towards me.  
  
"Come here." I grabbed the paper from her, then leaned over and signed it in a large scrawling mess. "There. If they ask, I wasn't looking at it."  
  
"Thanks Nigel." She walked out of the room and down the hall towards her desk.  
  
I pulled myself up off the floor, and instantly felt the effects of sleeping on a too-small couch run through my body. "Garret-"  
  
"Yeah Nigel?"  
  
"Don't ever let me sleep on that again...the last time I hurt that bad was after this one night--"  
  
"Nigel, I don't want to know about your love life. Please."  
  
"Alright Garret. I'll spare you this time." I was about to say something else when I heard a familiar voice coming from the doorway.  
  
"Hi guys..."  
  
We both whipped our heads up to see Jordan standing in the doorway. Garret looked at her. "Why are you here? You need to take time off..."  
  
"Love...go home...sleep...it's a beautiful thing..." I yawned and attempted to stretch, which only brought on more pain.  
  
"I need to see him."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***You may hate me, but I'm starting to see double, and it's 3:01 am now...straight typing...I need sleep myself. Thanks for reading!*** 


	13. Chapter 13

***Welcome to the all night marathon! Sorry, had to be weird, I'm very awake, despite 8 hours of sleep in the past 48 hours, but heck, I run better with less sleep. Alot better. Here comes chapter 13! And if some of it's confusing, it's probably because there is alot of internal conversation...as in thoughts...and we know thoughts ramble.***  
  
((Right after 12. That's all you gotta know!))  
  
CHAPTER 13:  
  
~~Jordan~~ I had to see him for myself. I had to see his body, be sure that this was all really happening...I know I saw him on the table in the exam room...but I need a chance to say goodbye to him. Just got to convince Garret and Nige to let me go take a peek at him...this should be fun!  
  
"I've need to see him." I leaned up against the doorframe.  
  
"Jordan, I don't know if that would be a good idea right now..." Garret slowly slid off his glasses and put them on his desk. "With your current state of mind, I'm afraid that you'd--"  
  
"Garret, no shrink stuff. Leave that for Stiles--I'm sure you've already called him in here today."  
  
"Actually Jordan, he called me when he heard about the whole thing. He figured he'd stop by to be sure we're all doing okay, but now that you mention it...perhaps you should have a session with him."  
  
"I don't need a shrink. I'm fine." I pulled on a piece of hair that had fallen in my face.  
  
"Jordan, shrinks can be quite...relaxing...if you know how to play them right..." Nigel looked up at me with a grin.  
  
"Thanks for the tip Nige, I'll be sure to come onto Stiles when I talk with him...that'll prove I'm still sane..." I walked over and nudged him in the ribs with my foot. "Why are you on the floor in Garret's office again?"  
  
He grabbed at my foot. "I had a fight with the couch...it got too rough, and I lost."  
  
I glanced over at Garret. "We all know what Nigel was dreaming about..."  
  
Garret shook his head and covered his ears. "I don't want to hear about, especially if he was on my couch Jordan..."  
  
They were SO skating around the topic, it wasn't even funny. All I want to do, is go in, pull out his drawer, see him, and say goodbye. Then I'll go, and wait for the funeral to freak out. Let's pull the "I never got to say I loved him" line...that should pull in the sympathy vote...  
  
I sank down on the couch, and dropped my head down...just a little, to get their interest...  
  
Nigel glanced up at me. "Love...you alright?" He put a hand on my knee and tried to look me in the eyes, but I just moved my head to the side.  
  
"I...I never got to tell him that I loved him Nigel...he didn't know that I loved him..." I buried my face in my hands, not expecting to actually start tearing up, but I did, since I was telling the truth.  
  
Garret got up from his desk and came and sat next to me quietly. He placed his arm around my shoulder and shook his head. "He knew Jordan...we all knew you loved him..."  
  
I choked back a sob. "I never got to tell him though. I never said it myself...that's all I want to do Garret...I want to tell him I love him..."  
  
"Jordan, sweetheart, I can't stop you from going in there. You work here too."  
  
"But you're my boss...you can suspend me..." I looked up at him, my eyes full of tears.  
  
"Like that's ever stopped you before, Jordan. Seriously." He pulled my chin up and smiled. "I can however, do something else."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"I can go in there with you...at least in the beginning, to be sure your alright. Then you can be with him alone, if that's what you want."  
  
I glanced up at him. "You serious?"  
  
He nodded. "If you want to do it, I'll go with you."  
  
"Okay." I looked down at Nigel, who smiled at me.  
  
"Go on Love...just be calm alright?"  
  
"I will Nige. Thanks." I grinned back at him, then glanced up when I heard a knock on the door.  
  
A grinning Peter stood in the doorway with a single sheet of paper in his hand.  
  
"Nigel...you aren't going to believe this..."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"The DNA from that cigar you brought in a few days ago. The profiling's done...and it may not be too good news--"  
  
"But it's news." Nigel hopped up and grabbed the paper out of Peter's hand, then skimmed it quickly. His face tensed for a minute, then he nodded. "That's important."  
  
"What is it Nige?" Garret glanced up at him.  
  
"That kid...he got killed by his dad." Nigel tried to smile at him, but he just shook his head.  
  
"Now we gotta find the dad...and I'm pretty sure where to look..."  
  
"Be careful Nige...don't act like me now..." I grinned at him.  
  
"I will be Jordan." He turned to Peter. "Now, Peter, my man...we need to run some more tests...come with me..." He left the room and walked down the hall quickly, towards his office.  
  
I glanced over at Garret. "Can we...?" I nudged my head towards the crypt.  
  
"Yes Jordan, we can." He stood, and pulled me to my feet, then we both went and walked out of the room together.  
  
Every step I took, I could feel my heart sink, just a little lower into my stomach. Why am I doing this? What good am I going to get out of seeing him? I thought to myself silently as we walked. When we got to the crypt, Garret held the door open for me, and we walked in. The doors shut behind us, and I glanced at the rows of drawers in front of me. Woody is in one of those drawers...he's a body in one of those drawers... I felt myself shake slightly, and Garret noticed it too.  
  
"You sure you're alright with this Jordan?"  
  
I nodded. "Yeah, I just got a chill...it's cold in here."  
  
He walked over to a drawer, read the tag on the end, slowly slid it open, and left it there. He looked up at me, and I slowly walked over to him and stood next to him. He put his arm around me again, and grabbed the end of the sheet with one hand. "You ready for this Jordan? Are you sure you want to do this?"  
  
I nodded, and he slowly pulled back the sheet, down to his chest, then laid it on top of him. All I could do was stare. I stood there, unmoving, for I don't know how long, just staring at him lying there. He...he looks asleep...maybe he's asleep... I gently reached out and touched the skin on his cheek, and my years of professionalism went out the window in a matter of split seconds. I jumped back when I felt how cold he was, and I grabbed onto Garret and just clung to him. Oh God...oh God...he's really dead...he's so cold...and pale...this can't be happening...not to Woody... My brain was in a panic, frantically trying to explain why he was lying there in the drawer, and Garret just stood silently, letting me clutch onto him. I felt my breathing and heart race out of control, and I must have been pressing pretty close to Garret, because he could feel it too.  
  
"Jordan...calm down...look at me Jordan. It's alright. Everything's okay...just breathe slower baby...calm down..." He placed both hands on my shoulders and stared me in the eyes while he was talking to me.  
  
I nodded at him, and then swallowed hard, and forced myself to stop freaking out. "I'm alright...I just got scared..."  
  
He nodded, and I turned around and looked down at Woody again. Well Jordan...now's a good a time as any to do this... Not taking my eyes off Woody, I spoke. "Garret? Could you leave me alone for a few minutes?"  
  
"Yes Jordan." He rubbed my shoulder reassuringly before I heard him walk out of the room, the doors to the crypt swinging shut behind him.  
  
I shut my eyes and breathed in deeply, trying to calm my nerves for what seemed like the billionth damn time. Do this Jordan...or you'll never get the chance to do it again. I looked down at Woody again, and I just started talking to myself.  
  
I don't really know how to do this...I've never actually talked to a dead person before...guess there's a first time for everything. How do I even start? There's so many things I want to say to you Woody...I don't know where I should begin. How about...I wish you weren't dead. That's a fair beginning. I wish that...you could know what you meant to me...what you mean to me. You, you were just a rookie cop with that cutesy smirk...everyone thought you wouldn't survive here in Boston...but you did. I know you would have made a good detective...Dad thought so too. But one thing--Woody--why did you have to go and do this sting? Why did you have to go chase that bastard? You could've had someone else go! You didn't need to go and hurt yourself just to catch that stupid jerk! Did you ever think of me?! Did you ever think about what we could have had?! Why didn't you just say "I can't do this..."?! I felt my heart start to race again, and my breathing quickened ever so slightly. Is this what they taught you in the force?! To give yourself up just to catch one lousy, pathetic, scumbag?! Why did you have to die on me?! Me, of all people Woody! You know what I've been through! You know about Mom and James and Malden! You know about all the nightmares and the problems I've had! Why did you do this to me?!  
  
I grabbed onto the edge of the drawer and tried to steady myself. "Why Woody...why did you have to die...I loved you...I still love you..." I held onto the drawer and sank to the floor, and collapsed into a sobbing heap. I was there for about ten minutes, just crying my head off, until Garret walked in. Upon seeing me on the floor, he rushed over and slid to his knees and grabbed my wrists gently.  
  
"Jordan...Jordan talk to me...look at me Jordan." His voice was urgent, yet full of pain.  
  
I looked up at him. "Why Garret? Why?" I let another sob escape from my throat, and I sank lower onto the floor, crying uncontrollably.  
  
~~Garret~~ Jesus...why did I ever let her in here? I should have known she was going to break down...I suppose it's best to let her cry it all out now... With the sound of another sob escaping from her muffled voice, I pulled her close to me, and she wrapped around me with both arms and clutched onto me again. "Jordan...sweetheart...just let go...let yourself let go..."  
  
She let out what seemed like a whimper, and then she snuggled her head into my chest. My scrubs were already soaked through with her tears, and I didn't care. "Jordan...I'm here...just remember that..." I swallowed hard as I felt the sting of tears now forming behind my eyes. This was Jordan...the strong, independent, intelligent woman who I had come to love like a sister...sobbing in my arms...and I could do nothing to help her. I prayed to myself silently. God...just let her let go...please...help her with this...she needs your help...I need your help...please...  
  
She lifted her head from my chest slightly. "I love him Garret...why did this have to happen?"  
  
"I don't know Jordan...I don't have the answers...this stuff just happens to everyone sometimes..."  
  
"But all the bad stuff happens to me!" She sniffed several times, then hugged me tighter, but without the tears.  
  
I shut my eyes and swallowed hard, then tried to make myself stop tearing up. I didn't want her to see me like this...not now...she didn't need to see me crying as well.  
  
"Garret?" She lifted her head again. "You're shaking...what's wrong?"  
  
I bit my lower lip and shook my head. "Nothing...I'm sorry...it's just..." I stammered out a few words.  
  
"Just what?" She looked up at me with that look on her face--the one that could stop you in your tracks, the one that you couldn't help smiling at-- and she loosened her grip around me slightly.  
  
"I can't stand to see you hurting so much..." I dropped my head to my chest, and she was there to instantly lift it up. She kissed the top of my head gently, and she squeezed me tight in a hug again.  
  
"Garret...I'm sorry..."  
  
"No Jordan, it's me...I'm just...protective of you."  
  
"I know Garret...that's why you're so great..."  
  
"Thank you Jordan." I looked up at the drawer which was still sitting open. "Don't hit your head when you get up..."  
  
She strained her neck backwards, then slowly rose to her feet, and she extended her hands to me. "You want up?"  
  
"Yeah." I took her hands and pulled myself to my feet. "Thanks."  
  
She turned and looked back down at the drawer with Woody in it. She gently pulled the sheet up over his head, and slid the drawer shut without a word.  
  
"You alright Jordan?"  
  
"I am now Garret. Thanks." She turned and walked out of the crypt, leaving me standing there staring at the still swinging doors.  
  
How in the hell does she do that? She just stands up and walks out like nothing happened at all...I wish I could do that sometimes... I glanced back at the rows of drawers...rows of people...rows of lives... I wish I could do that...  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***I'm off to bed now, thanks for reading, and yeah...man...that was a tough one for me to write...depressing actually...it might take a while for the next installment...I need to recover from writing this one...so, be safe, try to stay sane, and heck, have fun! Thanks again!*** 


	14. Chapter 14

***Hey people! Here comes chapter 14! Had to give myself a day off...but I put all my chapters so far on ff.net, except today it's being stupid...and I can't sign on to add this one!***  
  
CHAPTER 14:  
  
((This takes place in a bunch of places, I'll tell you when I get to that section! And its 2 days after chapter 13.))  
  
~~Garret~~ Thank God we don't have any cases today that won't keep until tomorrow...we're not going to be able to think straight after this afternoon... I grabbed a empty folder out of the drawer in my desk and placed a stack of papers in it. I'll need to go over these tomorrow...so just put them right here...  
  
"Excuse me, Dr. Macy?"  
  
I looked up to see Lily standing in the doorway. "Yeah Lily?"  
  
"The police chief just called, and he wants to confirm that we're all coming to Woody's funeral this afternoon."  
  
"Can you call him back and tell him that, yes, we're all coming?"  
  
"Sure Garret. You know that we're all going to the Pogue afterwards right?" She smiled at me.  
  
"Yeah, Max called me eariler and let me know. He's been really generous with the whole arrangements."  
  
"Well, you know how much Jordan liked Woody, so I know he liked him too."  
  
"Yeah, I know." I paused for a minute. "The funeral's at one right? I just want to double check."  
  
"Yes, it's at one."  
  
I nodded. "Alright. Lily?"  
  
"Yes Garret?"  
  
"Were you planning on driving yourself there?" I looked up at her again.  
  
"I hadn't decided yet...why do you ask?"  
  
"I was wondering if you wanted to ride with me maybe, so that you wouldn't have to drive?"  
  
She smiled. "Sure Garret! That would be great."  
  
I checked my watch. 11:30. I figured that we should all leave around 12:15 so we could get to the church on time. "How about we leave here at like twelve...fifteenish?"  
  
"Sounds good. You want me to tell Nige and them too?"  
  
"Sure, if you want."  
  
"Ok Garret." She turned and walked out of the room. I thought to myself. This is going to be one interesting day...and a very interesting funeral...  
  
~~Nigel~~ Alright. I've gotta get changed out of these scrubs in a few minutes and get ready for Woodrow's funeral...let me just finish up this roll of film...and we'll be done!  
  
"Hey, Nigel?"  
  
"Yeah Peter?" I glanced up at him from the other side of the table.  
  
"Are you going this afternoon? To Woody's thing?"  
  
"Of course. Are you?"  
  
"Yeah, I was just wondering if maybe I could ride with you over there...my car doesn't have much gas in it right now..."  
  
"Sure Mate. Do you know where the services are being held?"  
  
"Yeah, I got the directions from Lily. She says her and Garret are leaving here at like twelve-fifteen."  
  
"Okay, we can leave then, too. I've just gotta get this guy put away, then change out of these scrubs. Don't think they'd appriciate me showing up in these babys..."  
  
"Probably not Nigel. I've gotta go change too. See you in a little bit." He turned and walked out of the room.  
  
I grabbed the sheet and recovered the body on the table, then pushed him back into the crypt, sliding the drawer shut, and pulling my gloves off and throwing them into the trashbin. I walked out towards the locker room to get changed. Time to go get ready for the wrath of Jordan...  
  
~~Jordan~~ Alright. Just get ready. Dad's in the other room with Woody's family. We've gotta get throught this today. Just get ready, goto the funeral, then goto the Pogue and hang out. Just like a normal day... I heard someone knock softy on the door. "Who is it?"  
  
"Jordan, it's me. Can I come in for a minute?"  
  
"Sure Dad, just a second. Let me finish putting on my shirt." I quickly buttoned up my shirt and opened the door and let Dad in my room. "How are things going out there?"  
  
"Alright. Woody's mom's pretty shook up, but then, so would anyone's mother..." He looked at me and smiled. "You look beautiful today sweetheart."  
  
"Thanks Dad. Did you talk to Garret or anybody yet?" I really hoped they were all going to come. Please God, I hope they all come to his funeral...  
  
"Yeah, I talked to Garret about an hour ago. He's coming, and so is everybody else. They're going to meet us at the church."  
  
"Great. I'm glad they all decided to come." I smiled up at Dad and attempted to fix my hair. Wear it up or down...that's the big question of the day...  
  
"I knew they would, they wouldn't miss it Jordan." He turned to walk out of the room. "Oh, and Jordan?"  
  
"Yes Dad?"  
  
"Wear it down. You've always looked good with your hair down."  
  
"Thanks Dad. I'll be out in a minute."  
  
"Alright Jordan." He walked out of the room and shut the door behind him.  
  
I carefully brushed my hair, smoothed out my skirt, and readjusted my shirt. I looked at myself in the mirror, then sighed. "Well, looks like you're ready." I turned and walked out of the room, and joined the rest of the people who were gathered in Dad's house.  
  
~~Garret~~ "Alright. Twelve O' clock." I muttered to myself. Time was passing so slowly. I stood up and walked down the hall to the locker room to change my shirt and put on a tie. I walked in to see Nigel finish buttoning up his shirt, and Peter was attempting to put on a tie. Key word here was 'attempting'...I walked over to him and looked at him. "Need help?"  
  
He looked down at the tie, then back up at me. "Yeah, I guess so..." He took it off his neck and handed it to me. "Here...it's hopeless."  
  
I placed it around my neck so I could tie it around my own neck first. "It's easier to do if you've had to wear them alot...I can testify to that." I finished tying it, then slipped it off and handed it to him. "Here you go."  
  
"Thanks Dr. Macy." He took it from me and put it around his neck and tightened it.  
  
"You can call me Garret you know...at least when we aren't working..." I smiled at him.  
  
"Alright...Garret..." He fixed his collar and then looked over at Nigel. "You almost ready?"  
  
"Yeah." Nigel dragged a comb through his hair a few times, then nodded. "You driving by yourself Garret?"  
  
"No, I'm driving with Lily." I changed into a fresh shirt and put my own tie on.  
  
"Oh, okay." He threw his scrubs into the bin to be washed. "You ready Peter?"  
  
"Yeah. Let's go." He stood up and walked out of the room, but Nigel stayed behind for a second.  
  
"You talked to Jordan today, Garret?" He looked up at me.  
  
"No, not yet. I haven't had a chance to. I spoke with Max earlier, talked about plans for after the services." I reached down and tied my shoes for a second time.  
  
"Oh. I was wondering how she was doing so far..."  
  
"We'll find out soon enough. We've gotta get going if we want to get to the church on time." I stood up and put my other change of clothes into a locker, then walked out of the room, Nigel following me.  
  
"I'm driving Peter in my truck...you know how Bug's getting there?" He grabbed his keys from off his desk.  
  
"I think he's driving himself. He was going to just come straight from home, since he took today off."  
  
Nigel nodded. "Alright. I'll meet you at the church okay?"  
  
"Sure Nigel, see you there." I grabbed my keys and walked down the hall and poked my head into Lily's office. "You almost ready?"  
  
She glanced up. "Sure Garret. I was just waiting for you to come by..."  
  
"Well, I'm here, so let's go. Don't want to be late you know."  
  
She grabbed her purse and her sweater, then flicked off the lights in her office and smiled at me. "Ready." As we walked down the hall, she looked over at me and sighed. "I can't believe we're doing this...going to Woody's funeral..."  
  
"Neither can I Lily, neither can I..." I hit the button for the elevator, and we both stepped in, and she hit the button for the ground floor. Here goes nothing Garret...  
  
***AT THE CHURCH FOR THE FUNERAL***  
  
~~Jordan~~ Wow. There are alot of people here. It looks like all the department showed up for this...there's Lily and Bug...I see Nigel and Peter over there talking to Eddie...but where's Garret? I skimmed over the top of the crowd trying to find him. There he is. Next to Dad and Woody's parents. This church sure is beautiful...they sure picked out a good place to hold this thing...I hope there's enough room to seat everyone though!  
  
"Hey Jordan."  
  
I turned around to see Garret standing behind me.  
  
"How you holding up?" He smiled weakly at me.  
  
"Well, if my personal shrink MUST know, I'm doing alright. How are you doing?" I gave him a quick hug.  
  
"I'm doing fine. You know, Woody's parents seem like really nice people..."  
  
"Yeah they are. His mom's so sweet...she's always talking about Woody when he was a little kid."  
  
Nigel and Peter walked over to us and we created a little circle of morgue people. "Look, we're banding together guys...this can't be a good sign..."  
  
"Well, there are so many cops here, I'm starting to hope no INS agents are lurking around..." Nigel shifted his glance around jokingly.  
  
"INS agents?" Peter looked at all of us, obviously confused.  
  
"Peter, just be glad there aren't any here. Or Nigel might be asking you to marry him..." I laughed at him playfully.  
  
"You get desperate sometimes...you know Mate?" Nigel playfully nudged at him. "Although...you do strike me as quite attractive sometimes..."  
  
Garret laughed. "We'll have none of that right now guys...no matter how hot you think Peter is, Nigel."  
  
"Excuse me? Could I have everyone's attention?"  
  
We all turned towards the voice of the minister, who was standing by the door to the chapel.  
  
"We're ready to start the ceremony now. We're going to open these doors, and whoever would like to walk past the casket and pay their respects may do so. Please keep in mind that this is an open-casket funeral, so I'd like you all to be prepared in that aspect. Thank you." With that said, he opened a set of double doors that led into the main chapel. We all started to form in a line, most everybody wanted to walk past and say goodbye to Woody. We slowly moved forwards, chatting softly amongst ourselves about him, about what he did, and all the memories we had. When it got to be my turn to walk up to the casket. Garret placed a hand on my shoulder and held it there for a few seconds, then removed it. I knew what he was saying. I walked up to the casket and gently held the edge of it and looked in.  
  
Well...I suppose this is goodbye Woody. I just want to let you know that I love you...that we all love you, and that we're going to miss you alot...I going to miss you alot. He was very handsome, dressed in his police uniform, hair spiked in the way he normally did it, looking like he was asleep. My intuition said he wasn't, but I couldn't make myself think it. I'm going to miss you farmboy...just be safe...and I love you. I slowly walked away from the casket and took one look back at the rest of the staff, then went and sat in a pew next to Dad.  
  
~~Garret~~ Well, she isn't crying yet, so maybe we can get through this... I walked up to the casket and looked in at Woody. This was interesting. What to say? Detective Woodrow Hoyt...that has a good ring to it, I suppose...you were a good kid. A great cop, and a great guy. I'll always remember that time that we first worked together. You know, where I headbutted that jerk...your first arrest here in Boston...you were so green then, but you've matured alot. Don't worry about Jordan. Me and Nigel and Max are trying to get her over this...I know it won't be easy, but we've gotta try. She knows you loved her...we know you loved her too. You two would have been great together...just, sometimes things don't work out. I'm gonna miss you Woody...we're all going to miss you... I stepped away from the casket and went and sat next to Jordan, who was just staring straight ahead at the picture of Woody with the black ribbon across it. This has got to be the worst day of my life...  
  
~~Nigel~~ Well, what do I have to say? First off, sorry mate...I know you would have asked her soon enough...I just couldn't stand watching you drool over her for so long...but it all worked out right? You gave Jordan some of the best weeks of her life...no matter what happened at the end. Woodrow...I honestly wish I could have got to know you better. I glanced down at his body lying there in the casket and sighed. I hope now you're alright...and I want you to know that I swear...I am going to do everything in my power to keep Jordan safe. I won't let her get hurt. Ever. You have my word. I stared down at him for a few more seconds, then I went and sat next to Garret, Jordan, and Max quietly.  
  
Lily, Bug, and Peter walked up to him together, and they just stood and looked at him for a few minutes, occasionally muttering a few words quietly. They walked over and sat next to us, and we just sat and waited for the services to begin.  
  
~~Jordan~~ Well, this is it. Woody's funeral. Everybody's here, sitting down, ready to go. Let's try not to cry all over the dang place...nobody needs to see that. The ceremony was wonderful. Cal, (Woody's brother) got up and delivered a beautiful eulogy, and so did a few of Woody's close friends on the force. Everyone that was there knew Woody in one way or anyother, even a few of his old high school friends had flown in from Wisconsin to be here. When we got to the cemetary, everyone was given a single rose to place of his casket. It was covered by the time everyone had walked by. The graveside ceremony was short, and simple, and it was very nicely put together. We all stood around for a few minutes after it had ended, then I walked over and found Dad, who was getting ready to head back to the Pogue.  
  
"Want a ride sweetheart? I'm headed back to the Pogue to get ready for the all the guests." He put an arm around me.  
  
"Yeah, one minute though. I want to make sure the guys are coming." I quickly walked over to where Garret, Nigel, Peter, Eddie, Bug, and Lily were standing in a group with a few other detectives. "You all planning on coming back to the Pogue?"  
  
Nigel nodded. "Of course, Love. I'll be there."  
  
"Nigel's my ride, but I was planning on coming anyways...so yeah!" Peter smiled at me.  
  
Bug and Lily both nodded, and said "Yeah, we are.", at the same time.  
  
"I'm planning on going...how about you guys?" Eddie looked around at the other detectives and smiled. They nodded.  
  
"And you know I'll be there Jordan." Garret smiled at me.  
  
"Alright then, see you in a little bit. I'm gonna go help Dad get set up." I turned and walked off, then climbed into the car with Dad and drove away.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***Next chapter soon, Converstations in the Pogue and such...thanks for reading this LOONG chapter!*** 


	15. Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15:  
  
((This chapter is right after 14, takes place in the Pogue!))  
  
~~Jordan~~ Dang, there are more people here than there were at the funeral...Dad had better set out the tip jar or he's gonna go flat broke! Speaking of Dad...he'll probably need help tonight...better go play bar- wench so he doesn't go insane!  
  
"Hey Jordan. Glad you could join me."  
  
"Hey Dad. I figured you'll need some bar-help tonight..." I smiled at him as I walked around the end of the bar.  
  
"Sweetheart, Woody was your friend. You should be out there with all of his friends. I can do this without your help..."  
  
"Hey, Max! A couple of darks for us?" Eddie and Peter sat down at the already crowded bar.  
  
I grabbed two glasses and filled them, then set them in front of them. "You were saying Dad?"  
  
"You make tips, that's it." He grinned at me.  
  
"Oh, that's fine with me." I grabbed a few towels and stuck them into my pockets, pretending that they were guns. "On three, we draw."  
  
Garret fought his way through the crowd and squeezed between Peter and Eddie and stuck a twenty on the bar. "Scotch, no rocks."  
  
"That'll be a scotch with no rocks. Would you like to supersize that for free?"  
  
"Yeah, sure, little miss fast-food chain..." He glanced from side to side at Peter and Eddie.  
  
"You guys want anything?"  
  
Peter held up his beer. "I'm good."  
  
"I'm empty." Eddie drained the last of his beer in a single gulp. "Excuse me, Miss, but are refills free?"  
  
"For you...they can be..." I winked at him, then pulled another one out from under the counter and set it in front of him.  
  
"Thanks Jordan." He stood up off his seat and nodded towards the crowd. "I'm gonna go mingle...I'll try and survive." He walked off, and soon disappeared in the throng of people milling about the Pogue.  
  
Garret swiped his stool and glanced over at Peter. "You need a refill yet?"  
  
"Well, Dr. Macy, I--"  
  
He was cut off by Garret's hand. "It's Garret...we're not working...and take off that tie. You don't want to spill on it..."  
  
"Right. Garret. I keep forgetting." He pulled the tie off his neck, and I snatched it from him.  
  
"I'll put this back here." I hung it up on the corner of a sign we had hanging behind the counter. "It'll be safe here."  
  
"Ok, whatever." He glanced over at Garret. "Whiskey shots? On me?"  
  
Garret nodded. "I like your taste Peter...Jordan? You know the drill."  
  
"Two whiskey shots, coming right up!" I turned around and mixed the drinks, then set them in front of them. "Now, I want this to be a good, clean fight, no kicking, no spitting, and no spilling. I aint wiping up your messes."  
  
Garret grabbed his, and nodded at Peter, who did the same. "On three. We draw."  
  
I laughed, then counted to three. "One...two...three!"  
  
Garret threw back his head and pretty much inhaled his, while Peter just slammed his down his throat. They both hit their glasses on the bar at the same time.  
  
"Ooh...tough one...too close to call..."  
  
"I could drink you under the table in ten minutes..." Garret shoved his glass towards me. "Again."  
  
"I can drink you BOTH under the table in five." Nigel stepped forwards and slapped a twenty onto the bar. "Vodka. Straight up. Double shot." He glanced from Peter to Garret quickly. "They don't stand a chance..."  
  
"Give me what he's having." Peter leaned over and looked at Garret. "What's the matter? Afraid you'll be beaten by a rookie and a tall, skinny British freak?"  
  
"I am not a freak! You're the freak Winslow!" Nigel shoved Peter off to the side. "Let the real men handle this one..."  
  
Peter shoved his way back onto his stool. "Then I think you should leave." He smiled at Nigel, to let him know that he was just kidding, and then he looked up at Garret. "So?"  
  
"Double shot, straight up." He placed his hand on his shotglass. "You guys don't know what you're messing with here..."  
  
I laughed to myself as I turned around. This is going to be one interesting night... I slowly poured the drinks, then looked over at Dad, who caught my glance out of the corner of his eye. He walked over to me and pretended like he was getting something off the counter I was standing at.  
  
"Who's your money on?" He winked at me.  
  
"I'd have to say Nigel, but hey, I've never seen Peter get toasted before..."  
  
"Well, as long as they don't puke all over the damn place, keep giving them to 'em, kay sweetheart?"  
  
"Sure Dad, I will." I laughed, then turned around and placed the three shotglasses in front of them. "You do all know, we have work tomorrow..."  
  
"Jordan? Since when have you worried about work?" Peter glanced up at me.  
  
"It's not me I'm worried about...it's you three."  
  
Garret shook his head. "I'll stop myself. If not, I'm sure Max knows a quick cure for the hangover of the year..."  
  
"Yeah, and hell, worse comes to worse, we just let Bug do all the autopsies." Nigel grabbed his glass, then looked around at all of us. "For Woody?"  
  
I nodded, then poured myself a shot. "For Woody."  
  
Garret and Peter raised their glasses with us, and we all drank them in a single gulp. I felt myself wince as it burned down my throat, but I shook it off and set the glass down on the countertop. Damn...that one stung...  
  
"You alright Luv?" Nigel pushed his glass towards me.  
  
"Yeah, just haven't taken a straight shot in a while. I'm out of practice." I grinned at him, as I set the vodka bottle on the countertop. "That stays here, but feel free to refill as often as you'd wish."  
  
"Why thank you, Jordan." Garret reached for the bottle before Nigel could get to it, and he poured himself another shot. "Peter?"  
  
"I think I'll watch this round. I'm gonna throw in the towel." He leaned over and grabbed one of the towels out of my pocket.  
  
"Hey! That's mine!" I snatched at it, but he pulled it back too fast. "Give it back!"  
  
"I will. Let me throw it first." He threw the towel at Nigel. "It's up to you to uphold the underclass of the morgue...godspeed."  
  
Nigel caught it, then handed it back to me. "Be dammed it I don't try Peter. But Garret, he's quite a stiff when it comes to his drinks..." He turned and looked at him. "Again?"  
  
Garret nodded. "Again. This one to...Woody's family."  
  
I nodded, then poured myself another drink as well. "Woody's family."  
  
Garret echoed me, and we all drank our shots, and looked around at each other.  
  
~~Garret~~ Can't believe we're actually doing this...I can tell I'm going to have the headache from hell tomorrow. But, I can't let Nigel beat me for that matter. I'm older...more experienced..." I grabbed for the bottle and refilled both mine and Nigel's glasses again. "You still think you can beat me?"  
  
"Oh yeah. You wait and see." He readily took the glass from me, and downed it in a single gulp.  
  
"I wasn't ready."  
  
"So? Makes it all the more easy for you." He poured himself another. "Ready?"  
  
I nodded, and we both slammed them back down our throats. I wasn't even feeling the burn anymore--that could be a bad thing. What the hell... I thought.  
  
Nigel glanced over at me. "How long you been practicing for this?"  
  
"I honestly wish I wasn't here doing this Nigel." I shifted my gaze to the countertop. "I don't think anyone wishes they were here."  
  
Jordan reached out and took my glass from me, and drank it. "You're getting sentimental. You're done for the night." She reached over and grabbed Nigel's glass too. "That goes for you as well." She drank his, then placed them both under the counter.  
  
"And Luv, that stops me how?" He grabbed the bottle off the counter and took a swig off of it, then passed it to Garret. "For you?"  
  
I grabbed it from him, and took a long drink. "For me."  
  
"Come on guys, don't do this." She grabbed the bottle back as well, and replaced it with three beers. "This'll take longer to get you sick."  
  
We sat and talked for hours, pausing long enough for Jordan to mix a quick drink, take a break, or just wipe away a few stray tears. We all had them, at one time or another. Max got up and made a toast, which lead to a frenzy of toast-making, by many of Woody's good friends in the department, his parents, and of course, Nigel. His was quite interesting...very detailed description all about Woody's inner character...don't know how he did it, without falling off the stool he was propped up on though. The last thing I remember about the whole night was Jordan grabbing my keys and shoving me towards the corner of the Pogue that had a bunch of couches in it...the "lounge area"...or something like that.  
  
***THE NEXT MORNING, 8 AM-ish***  
  
((still Garret's P.O.V.))  
  
I groggily opened my eyes and felt the room spin underneath me. I quickly shut them, and I rolled over and grabbed onto the couch cushions to try and "steady" myself. I had no idea where I was, how I got there...or who's couch I was on. I felt someone grab my shoulder, and I heard a voice calling my name...I couldn't even figure out who it was, until they shook me to try to wake me up.  
  
"Garret...Garret...you alive in there?"  
  
Jordan. That's who it was. Why was Jordan trying to wake me up? I didn't want to wake up...not for a very very long time anyways.  
  
"Garret. Wake up." She shook me again.  
  
"What do you want?!" I rolled back over, nearly falling off the couch in the process, until I felt her grab me and keep me from falling.  
  
"Well, if you must know, I was checking to be sure you're still breathing."  
  
I weakly opened one eye and smiled at her, then the room started to spin again. "God...damn...am I at the Pogue?" I shut my eye and sank back into the couch.  
  
"Yeah, you're here. You, Nigel, Eddie, Peter...we had a sleepover party."  
  
"Your Dad let us stay here?" I slowly pulled myself up to a sitting postion, then I let my head fall back and I breathed in deeply, trying not to be sick.  
  
"He made you stay here. Well, at least you and Eddie anyways..."  
  
"What about Nigel and Peter?" I looked at her. Okay...spinning room is stopping...  
  
"They got back into their little drinking game...Peter lost, by one shot, then went and puked his guts out in the bathroom for about an hour. He passed out cold on the floor next to the toilet...Eddie walked in and found him." She smiled at me, trying not to laugh.  
  
"And Nigel?" I looked up at her, afraid of what she was going to say.  
  
"Well, I had to beat him off me with a stick. He claimed that I was the 'hottest damn thing to walk the face of the Earth' then tried to kiss me a few times."  
  
"Nigel did?" I glared over at him, asleep on the floor.  
  
"Yes, but I managed to fend him off, don't worry." She grinned at me. "After I wouldn't kiss him, he went over and fell asleep on that couch. He fell off sometime last night."  
  
I looked up at her. "No secrets for your 'bestest girlfriend'?"  
  
"Despite the fact that you make a very amusing drunk, no."  
  
"Was I that bad?" I could see it now...spreading like wildfire around the morgue... Garret makes ass of himself...with pictures!  
  
"You were fine. You just tried to play pool against Eddie. Which was amusing, to say the least."  
  
"No pictures?"  
  
She shook her head. "No pictures. Want painkillers?" she handed me a bottle of beer and three Excedrin.  
  
I took them willingly, and nodded. "Peter still alive?"  
  
"He was breathing when Eddie pulled him out of the bathroom. We set him over there on the couch, he hasn't moved since. I think Nigel's a bad influence on him." She glanced over at them and shook her head.  
  
"Give him time...he'll be able to beat Nigel soon enough." I swallowed the pills then took a slow drink off the beer. "Bug call?"  
  
"Yeah, he was wondering when you were coming into work."  
  
"Tell him later...way later..." I leaned back on the couch again, and felt myself falling asleep.  
  
"I will Garret. Have a nice nap."  
  
"Uh huh..." I drifted off to sleep and was soon thrown into one of the weirdest dreams of my life....  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***Thanks for reading, I'll post more when I have time!*** 


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16:  
  
((Kind of a weird chapter, but, who cares. I like writing bizarre stuff. THIS IS MAINLY GARRET'S DREAMS, AT LEAST IN THE BEGINNING OF THE CHAPTER.))  
  
~~Garret~~ I felt myself slipping off into a restless sleep, my head pounding from the killer headache I had, my body aching from sleeping on a too small couch all night. Mixed with my current level of clear-headedness, this was not a good combination. The last real thought I remember was Jordan telling me something about sleeping...and something about Bug calling. Then it all slipped into a dream at that point.  
  
***Garret's dream***  
  
I heard someone yelling something at me. I was standing outside on the roof of the morgue, looking out at the skyline of Boston, the sun just setting. I turned, to see Lily peeking her head out the door and smiling at me.  
  
"Garret?! You awake?!"  
  
"Yeah, I'm just thinking. What do you want?"  
  
"The Plaza's on line three for you. They want you to assist in some drug raid on a suspected heroin dealer's house."  
  
"Me?!" Why the hell would they want me to assist?  
  
"Something about a body ID. They're at the house now. They said to get your ass down there pronto."  
  
"Alright, I'm on my way." I turned back to look at the skyline, but I suddenly found myself standing in front of a burning building, surrounded by police and fire officials.  
  
"Macy! We need your help now!" The police chief came running over to me.  
  
"What?! I'm here, but I don't even know why." I glared up at him.  
  
"We've got a problem. Detective Hoyt and the suspect are down in the basement of that building." He motioned towards the house behind him. "We have a feeling that they are both dead. We need you to go in with City Fire and get the bodies out now."  
  
"Now?! The thing's still on fire!"  
  
"I know, but we need those bodies for DNA testing and anaylsis. They can't get burnt."  
  
"What do you need to DNA test?" I looked over at the building.  
  
"We have suspicions that Detective Hoyt was actually involved in a heroin smuggling ring, and we need to run some basic drug diagnostic testing on him."  
  
"Woody?! You have got to be kidding me. He's never seemed like he was on..."  
  
"I know, but sometimes we don't always see to the bottom of the truth Garret." With that, the chief turned and walked away from me, and I was then standing in front of the door to the burning building.  
  
"Are you ready to move in, Dr. Macy?" I looked up to see a fireman staring at me, clutching an axe to his chest.  
  
"Yeah, I guess so." I stepped into the building, ducking to avoid the fallen beams from the roof of the house, and shading my eyes to get rid of the smoke that filled the entire room.  
  
"The basement's down that way. We think the bodies are in there." Another fireman motioned down a rickey set of stairs that led down into a smoke filled hole under the house.  
  
"You want me to go down there?" I almost started laughing at the firemen standing around the doorway.  
  
One of them handed me a helmet. "Go. Get the bodies. Come out. Then you're done."  
  
I took the helmet, then slowly desended the stairs into the smoke filled basement, where I noticed two dark figures lying on the floor. I noticed that the flames on the other side of the basement were growing larger by the second, so I bent down to ID the bodies and try and move them out of the basement.  
  
I nearly had a heart attack when the one on the right grabbed at me.  
  
"Garret..."  
  
I swung around to come face to face with a very beaten and burned Woody clutching my arm. I froze, in complete shock. He can't be alive... I thought to myself. There was no way that he was even close to being alive...he was hurt too badly. I shoved him off me, which only made him clutch onto my arm again, but tighter.  
  
"Get me out of here...please..."  
  
I felt my heart rate jump up about 50 beats. I could hear my breathing increase, I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my system. He was dead. I knew that. But he was here.  
  
He drew his pistol and shoved it into my hand. He locked eyes with me, and without saying a word, stepped back. I knew what he wanted. He fell to the floor and cried out in pain, then looked up at me again. "Please...Garret...do it."  
  
I shot my eyes down to the gun in my hands, then back at him. He was pleading...those brilliant blue eyes were staring straight at me...staring straight into me. I shook my head. "I can't Woody."  
  
He reached for the gun weakly. "Then give it."  
  
I handed it to him, and watched in horror as he raised it to his own head. He then looked up at me, and winced. "Tell Jordan...I'm sorry."  
  
I shook my head at him. "Don't...Woody...not this..."  
  
I saw a blinding flash, then heard the crack of a gunshot, and saw him slump on the floor, lifeless. I turned and ran for the stairs trying to get out, when I felt my body being shook by an unseen hand.  
  
"Garret! What the hell is wrong?!"  
  
***Out of the dream now***  
  
"Wake up Garret!" I heard Jordan's voice, and felt her shaking my arm fiercely.  
  
I opened my eyes to see her standing over me, her eyes watering with tears. "Jordan?"  
  
"Oh God, Garret...you're alright." She instantly wrapped her arms around me in a huge hug.  
  
I grabbed her in my arms. "What's wrong?"  
  
"You were shaking...and crying..." She glanced at me nervously. "You alright?"  
  
"I was having a nightmare...about..." I shut myself up. Don't say it Garret...not about what you dreamed...she'll freak out...  
  
"About what?" She gently rubbed my back with one hand.  
  
"About Abby. I just got scared I guess...I'm alright now..."  
  
"You sure Garret?"  
  
I glanced around at the others, who were still asleep on the couches around us. "Yeah I'm fine. I just got scared." I sat up weakly on the couch. "I guess that's what I get for getting drunk off my ass huh?"  
  
She nodded. "A very good piece of ass at that." She offered me a weak smile, then motioned her head towards the door. "Breakfast? On me?"  
  
I stood up slowly. "Fine. But you choose the place."  
  
She winked at me. "I was planning on it. Let's go."  
  
I grabbed my coat, glanced at the sleeping goup, then walked out of the door. Jordan scrawled a quick note that she left on the table by the door, and she quickly followed behind me.  
  
"So...where you want to eat?" I glanced down at her.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED: 


	17. Chapter 17

***And we're going to be off again, in a short while, so be prepared for a wild ride! Thanks to Beth S. for a great idea!***  
  
CHAPTER 17:  
  
((This chapter takes places a week after chapter 16. They're all sober now, and Jordan's only had one talk with Stiles so far...she's refusing to talk to him anymore. She won't really talk to anyone, except her dad, which is understandable. This chapter takes place in the Morgue.))  
  
~~Jordan~~ Well, another day Jordan...be prepared for another round of questioning by the staff. I glanced down at my watch. Eight-twenty-one. Garret's probably arranged for Stiles to be here by eight-thirty, but I'll get the talk from him by eight-twenty-five. Better mess up my hair and looked depressed, just to make him happy... I thought to myself, as I heard the door to my office click open softly. Here goes nothing...  
  
"Jordan? Can I come in?" Garret slowly opened my door and stepped inside.  
  
"I take it you weren't planning on me giving permission, now were you?"  
  
"Jordan--if you don't want me here, I'll leave. No questions asked." He started backing towards the door.  
  
I shook my head. "You can stay, but I know you're going to ask questions. The same damn 'How are you feeling today? Are you going to talk to Howard today? Why won't you open up to us?'" I leaned back weakly in my chair and sighed. "Why do you keep doing this to me Garret?"  
  
He stood there for a few minutes, silent. Then he spoke, his voice soft. "You think I like doing this to you Jordan?"  
  
"With the way you do it every damn morning, you'd think you liked it!" I glared up at him from my chair. "You can't get enough of trying to break through my shell! Don't you ever just lay off?!"  
  
As soon as I said it, I knew I shouldn't have. His face instantly fell, and he walked backwards until he hit the door frame. He turned around and opened the door, then looked back at me.  
  
"Jordan, I'm sorry that you don't understand that I'm trying to help you. I'm sorry that I ever gave you a second chance. I'm sorry that I tried to get you to take a look at your life and realize that yes, there are people here who care about you. People who give a damn when you run off without telling anyone where you're going to, how long you'll be gone. People who want to help you. People who love you Jordan...we all love you. And I'm sorry you can't see that now, but I hope to God you figure it out as soon as you damn well can." With that, he turned his back on me and walked out of my office, slamming the door behind him.  
  
All I could do was stare at the closed door, and I felt tears well up behind my eyes. What did I just do?  
  
~~Garret~~ I slammed the door shut behind me and stormed away from her office, nearly shoving Peter out of the way when he came running after me, a file in hand.  
  
"Dr. Macy? I was wondering if I could get you to sign these papers..." He pushed the files in my face.  
  
"Not now Peter. Get someone else to sign them." I shoved them out of my face, and turned sharply into my office, where I slammed my hand down on my desk and glared up at Peter, who had a very confused look on his face.  
  
"But, Dr. Macy, I need you to sign them." He gently set them down on my desk.  
  
"Why?! Can't you have Nigel or Bug do it?!"  
  
"You were the initial M.E. on the case sir--"  
  
I grabbed a pen and quickly scrawled my signature on the sheets of paper, then shoved it back at him. "There. Now get out."  
  
"Yes Dr. Macy. Sorry to bother you." He turned and nearly went running out the door, which I slammed behind him.  
  
I walked over to my couch, and collapsed on it, my heart still pounding in my chest, my breathing still shaking my whole body. I bent my head to my chest and rubbed the back of my neck with my hand, then I laid down, and stared at the ceiling. I needed to talk to someone. I just didn't know who.  
  
~~Nigel~~ I caught a glance of Peter running out of Dr. M's office, and I was bloody as all hell confused at all the door slamming and cursing going on, so I grabbed Peter by the arm as he walked by.  
  
"Peter? What the hell just happened in there?"  
  
He was visibly shaken. "I don't know, but Macy is NOT in a good mood. I wouldn't suggest going in there without a police escort."  
  
"He mad?"  
  
"Tried to tear my head off when I asked him to sign these release forms."  
  
"Alright. You seen Jordan?" I looked towards her office, the shades were drawn shut, and it looked like the lights were off.  
  
"Check her office, Macy came bursting out of there a minute ago." He grabbed a handful of pens out of the mug on Bug's desk. "I needed more of these..."  
  
"Thanks Mate. I'll watch out for Dr. M." With that, I turned and walked down the hallway to the door of Jordan's office. I knocked softly on the door, and with no answer, I pushed it open and peeked inside.  
  
"Go away." I heard her voice come from somewhere inside.  
  
"Jordan? You alright Luv?" I stepped into the office, and waited for my eyes to adjust to the darkness.  
  
"I don't want no damn peace offerings from Garret, so get the hell out." I heard her sniffle back a few sobs, then I saw her curled up in her big chair.  
  
"I'm not bringing peace offerings...Jordan...what happened?" I walked over and knelt by her side. "What's wrong?"  
  
She looked at me, her eyes full of tears, and she bit her lip to keep from crying out. "I'm...an ungrateful bitch..." As soon as the words escaped her mouth, she broke down, sobbing uncontrollably.  
  
I was shocked. "What did you just say? Jordan. Don't you dare say that. Ever."  
  
"I don't care that people love me...I'm an ungrateful spoiled bitch." She pulled her arms close to her chest. "I don't deserve you guys..."  
  
I grabbed her wrists and pulled them onto my chest. "Jordan...why the hell are you saying this..." I tried to get her to look me in the eyes, but she wouldn't.  
  
"Nigel...I don't deserve all this...I don't deserve to live anymore..." She dropped her head to her chest, and curled up in a ball and sobbed her heart out.  
  
I picked her up gently, then sat on the chair, her on my lap. I held her tight, and let her cry onto my shoulder. "Jordan...don't you ever say that again." I picked her head up and stared her in the eyes.  
  
"But Nigel, I deserve to die like the rest of the damn people in Boston! Why can't I be in one of those drawers?! Why did Woody get to die?!" She glared at me, her eyes full of pain.  
  
"I won't let you be in one of those drawers Jordan. If you ever tried to hurt yourself, I couldn't let myself deal with it. You know Woody didn't mean to die Luv...he wanted to be with you..." I was dead shocked, that she would ever say something like that, to my face at least.  
  
"But you shouldn't care Nigel...no one should..." She snuggled up to my arm and sniffled. "I'm not worth it..."  
  
I held her tightly in a hug, and shook my head. "You're worth everything...everything...and don't let anyone tell you different...not even Garret..." I looked out the door of her office to see Lily standing and peeking in the window, making the motion of talking on the phone. I shook my head at her, and she nodded and walked away. This was much more important.  
  
~~Garret~~ As I laid on the couch, I felt my entire body become more and more tense...I could still hear my head pounding...and I was beginning to feel like I was getting hammered by hundreds of baseball bats all over the damn place. I didn't even bother to look up when I heard my door open, but when I heard the infamous voice of Howard Stiles, I groaned to myself. Why God...why now? "Hello Howard."  
  
"Why hello Garret! Sleeping on the job already?" He quickly made himself comfortable in the chair next to my couch. "Have we made any progress on Jordan yet today?"  
  
Funny...how would you describe progress... I shook my head. "Not really...I just made things worse...as usual..."  
  
He raised an eyebrow at me. "Worse? What did you do? Kill another one of her friends?" He laughed...that annoying laugh that I hated deep inside, and I almost got up and smacked him.  
  
"I did NOT kill Woodrow. I am not responsible for her. She doesn't want my help, she won't get it. Don't you DARE think differently Howard..." I sank down into the couch and covered my face with my arm.  
  
"Garret...I didn't mean it that way...I'm sorry." He reached out to try and touch my shoulder, but I swatted his hand away.  
  
"Don't touch me."  
  
"Alright...no need to get snappy with me. I'm only here to help as well..."  
  
"Then help." I shut my eyes weakly.  
  
"Do you have anything you need to get off your chest...anything at all?"  
  
I shifted uncomfortably, then nodded. "Well, for the past week or so...I've been having these nightmares..."  
  
"About what?" He leaned towards me.  
  
"About Woody."  
  
~~Jordan~~ I must have cried to Nigel for at least an hour...maybe longer. He held me the entire time...I was exhausted when I finished. I couldn't even get up on my own...he had to pick me up and set me on my chair.  
  
"Jordan? You want to go home?" Nigel gently touched me on the shoulder.  
  
I shook my head. "I don't trust myself to be alone...not now..."  
  
He nodded. "Your Dad's place?"  
  
"He's out of town."  
  
"Then you're coming to my place. You need to sleep, and you can have my bed." He stood up and grabbed my coat. "Come on."  
  
"But...it's only ten-thirty..."  
  
"No one's died yet today Luv, and Bug and Peter and Dr. M. are here. Let's go. I'm not letting you drive."  
  
I looked up at him and wiped a few stray tears out of her eyes. "Fine. I'll come." I stood up weakly, and put on my coat, then headed for the door.  
  
"Alright, I'll tell Lily on the way out, and we'll be good to go!" He opened the door for me, then placed an arm around my shoulder and walked me out to the lobby, where he stopped and told Lily what was going on.  
  
"So, if I get needed, just page me, but try to get Bug or Peter to cover for me okay?"  
  
Lily smiled at him. "Sure thing Nigel. Jordan, you feel better, and get some rest."  
  
As we walked away, I whispered up at Nigel. "What did you tell her, that I had the flu?"  
  
"No, the chicken pox." He winked at me, then pressed the button for the elevator.  
  
I nudged him playfully. "Thanks Nige."  
  
"For what Jordan?" He stepped onto the elevator as the doors slid open, and helped me in. "Parking level...one." He pressed the button, then looked over at me.  
  
"For being there for when I needed you most."  
  
"You never had to ask, I was always there, and I always will be." He pulled me close to his side, and we rode the elevator to the bottom floor, where we walked out and climbed into his truck.  
  
"Are we going to be attacked by your dog?"  
  
He laughed. "Probably. He has a thing for sad people. Which we both are..."  
  
"Good. I could use a good licking..." I winked at him.  
  
"Jordan...don't you even get me started..."  
  
~~Garret~~ Here I was...spilling my guts out to our resident shrink...acting like a complete fool, but I didn't even care.  
  
"So...these are always the same dreams. You seeing Woody kill himself."  
  
I nodded. "He hands me the gun first. He wants ME to kill him."  
  
"But you don't?" He stared at me.  
  
"I tell him I can't. Then he takes the gun back, and kills himself." I swallowed hard. "I see him blow his damn brains out...every time..." I felt my voice crack, and I started to shake.  
  
"Every time? You see it? What do you see? Have you told Jordan about this?"  
  
"What do you think I see?! I see him hold his gun up to his head and pull the trigger! I see his head dissolve into pieces! I see his brains hit the wall! I see him die! What do you think I see Howard?! And hell no, I haven't told Jordan about this!" I stood up off the couch and walked over to the door to my office and stood there, seething.  
  
"Now, Garret, I need you to sit down and explain in detail what you see..."  
  
"I HAVE explained it Howard!" I turned and sent my fist flying through the glass on my door, shattering it completely. "What MORE do you want me to say?!?!" I flung the door open, and stood staring at him.  
  
"Garret. You need to calm yourself down. This is all going on your psychiatric report. You need to keep that in mind. Please sit back down and let me finish the session."  
  
"I...I am finished Howard. It's been a pleasure talking to you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have places to go." I turned and walked out of the room, ignoring the searing pain in my hand and arm, and quickly headed for the elevators.  
  
As soon as I came around the corner from my office, I was met by the shocked stares of Bug, Peter, Emmy, and Lily.  
  
Lily cautiously took a step towards me. "Garret...you need help for your arm..."  
  
I held up my hand. "Just...don't touch me." I glanced around at the other people. "What?! You've never seen blood before? Get back to work?!"  
  
They all nodded, and scurried off, except Lily, who I turned and stared at. "Where's Jordan?"  
  
"She...left with Nigel about an hour ago...he took her back to his apartment so she could get some rest, she looked pretty tired."  
  
"To his apartment?" I reached down a pulled a large chunk of glass out of my arm and let it fall to the floor.  
  
"Yes. At least that's what he said..." She looked up at me nervously.  
  
"Alright. I have someone I need to go talk to." I turned and yanked another bloody shard of glass out of my arm.  
  
"Garret, please, you need to go to the hospital..." She stepped towards me.  
  
"I need tell Jordan the truth." I dropped the shard of glass on the counter, then I walked out of the lobby and got onto the elevator. As the doors slid shut behind me, I could only imagine what I had to do next.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***I know, this may have been odd, but don't worry, it'll all get resolved soon! Thanks for reading!!!*** 


	18. Chapter 18

***Thanks for reviews on 17, I hope I get even more on 18! Here we go, and I know most people are expecting a big Garret/Jordan talk, but I can't feel it happening right now, but it might...sometime soon...thanks!***  
  
CHAPTER 18:  
  
((Nigel's apartment, 11:45 am.))  
  
~~Jordan~~  
  
"I swear Nigel, if your dog tries to use me as a pillow while I'm sleeping..." I glanced up at him as we were riding the elevator up to his floor.  
  
"Well, I haven't gotten to bring any other girls home to him lately, so we'll have to find out how he reacts."  
  
"Still working on that case of that kid?"  
  
"Yeah, in the free time I've got. I think Garret's getting kinda sick of me doing it though..."  
  
"He said anything to you?" I smiled at him as the elevator doors slid open.  
  
He stepped off first. "No, but I can tell, everytime he catches me running some different test or something...he kinda gives me one of those looks that he has." He reached into his coat to find his keys.  
  
"I've seen plenty of those looks before, he's just being Garret." I heard the impatient scratching and whining coming from the other side of the door.  
  
"You're going to have to excuse the mess Luv, but I haven't been around to clean much this last week..." He turned the key in the lock and opened the door. "Just don't touch anything that looks dirty, and you'll be alright."  
  
I stepped inside, and looked around at the room. "It isn't THAT bad Nige..."  
  
He shut the door behind him. "When you can tell how old your takeout is by what junk-mail's sitting next to it, it's bad."  
  
"Well, it passes the Jordan standard of cleanliness, so welcome to the club." I sat down on his couch, and came face to face with a very sleepy, very fat, feline laying sprawled on the back of the couch.  
  
"Oh, that's Rodger. Don't mind him...he sleeps there whenever I'm home...while I'm gone however..." He threw his coat down on the counter dividing the kitchen and the hallway, then opened up his fridge. "Want anything?"  
  
"What does Rodger do while you're gone Nige?" I laughed at him, then nodded. "Got any water?"  
  
"You're in luck Jordan, I just restocked." He grabbed two bottles of water, and shut the fridge, then walked back over to the couch. "And Rodger?"  
  
"Yes Nigel, Rodger."  
  
"He throws lavish parties for all the cats in the damn neighborhood, makes a mess of my clothes, shreds my couch, then they're all gone as soon as I open my front door." He looked over at Rudy, who was still standing by the front door, staring at it expectantly.  
  
"I think he wants something." I looked over at the door. "I think he wants to go on a walk."  
  
"Oh no. You said it." He glanced back at me. "Now you're in trouble."  
  
I didn't quite understand what he meant by "trouble" until I found myself getting jumped on, barked at, and slobbered over by a now very excited bulldog puppy. "Alright! I'll walk you! Calm down!" The restatment of the word "walk" just proceeded to excite Rudy even more, until he was racing back and forth from the couch to the door, as fast as his little stubby bulldog legs would carry him.  
  
"Here, you'll need this." Nigel leaned over and grabbed his leash, which I noticed was covered in various chew marks. He handed it to me, then nodded. "The park?"  
  
"Sounds good to me." I stood up off the couch, then quickly attached the leash to Rudy's collar, and nearly got dragged off my feet to the door. "Damn he's strong!"  
  
"I know, he hasn't quite learned to 'heel' yet. I need to take him back to obidience school." He grabbed a bag full of dog treats, and opened the door. "Shall we?"  
  
"As long as he doesn't take me down the stairs, I'll be fine!" I held on tightly as Rudy took off down the hall towards the elevator, me trailing behind him.  
  
Nigel only shook his head and laughed. "He's not that mean Jordan!"  
  
~~Garret~~  
  
"Why do I get myself into this..." I muttered to myself as I drove along the backstreets of Boston, attempting to avoid the midday traffic that plagued the city like wildfire plagues the California canyons. "Can't people just NOT drive right now?" I slowly came to a stop at a red light, and I glanced down at my arm, which had stopped bleeding, finally. There were still dozens of glass shards sticking out, but I didn't want to even try to pull them out, now that the adrenaline in my system had returned to a normal level. As the light changed to green, I made a left hand turn, and was promptly greeted by the view of a traffic accident blocking all 3 lanes of the street. I was about to yell something to myself, when my phone rang.  
  
"This is Macy." I fumbled with it, putting it on my shoulder so I could still drive with my good hand.  
  
"Garret? It's Lily."  
  
I sighed. "What Lily?"  
  
"I wanted to tell you that, Renee just stopped by, and she wants you to call her as soon as you can."  
  
"Alright. Anything else?" I thought to myself Great...Renee wants me to call her...this should be fun.  
  
"She saw the nice trail of blood you left all over the morgue...and the piece of glass you left on the countertop." She paused for a second. "Where are you?"  
  
"Not where you want me to be, that's for sure." I knew she was going to say something about going and getting my arm stitched up, so I just waited for her to say it.  
  
"Garret, you need to get your arm looked at. Are you driving?"  
  
"If you call sitting in accident traffic wasting gas driving, then yes, I am driving." I sighed.  
  
"You shouldn't be driving with one hand."  
  
"I know that Lily. I also shouldn't be on a cell phone while driving, but, I'm doing that too."  
  
I heard her sigh on the other end.  
  
"What now?" I shifted my car into park and turned it off. I obviously wasn't going anywhere for a while.  
  
"Just call Renee. She's mad."  
  
"I figured as much. I'll call her right now."  
  
"Alright, goodbye Garret."  
  
"Bye Lily." I pressed the end button on my phone, then set it on the passenger seat next to me. I didn't want to talk to anyone else, the pain in my arm was starting to come back, and I was already angry enough.  
  
Unfortunately, I didn't get that option. My phone rang again, and I had to supress the urge I had to throw it out the window. I grabbed it, hit the answer button, and growled my name into the phone.  
  
"Macy."  
  
"Well, guess who's in some deep crap today...our resident psychopath..."  
  
"What do you want Renee?"  
  
"What? No hello? No how are you?"  
  
I rolled my eyes. "If you start off talking about crap and psychopaths, then no, I'm not saying hello."  
  
"Well, if you walked into a morgue and saw trails of blood, glass shards everywhere, and a very stunned staff all pointing at your office, where there is a VERY stunned shrink, I can start off with psychopath."  
  
"Fine. What do you want?" I leaned my head on the steering wheel and sighed.  
  
"I was wondering, if you were busy for lunch. But now, I'm wondering if you're still sane."  
  
"I'm fine Renee."  
  
"You haven't been to the hospital." I heard her sigh on the other line.  
  
"So?"  
  
"I saw all the blood, and with the way Lily was throwing a damn panic attack, you'd think your arm was missing."  
  
"It's not, it's sitting right here. I picked it up off the floor after it fell off."  
  
She laughed. "Alright then. Sounds good."  
  
"No, I'm fine...for now, I should go get it checked out later, but who cares. Although..."  
  
"Although what Garret?"  
  
"It would be nice to have someone take all this glass out, instead of me sitting at my kitchen sink and doing it myself."  
  
"Got food at your kitchen sink?"  
  
"Yeah." I looked up at the traffic ahead of me, which was starting to crawl again. "Can you be there in twenty minutes?"  
  
"I'm game. I'm just going to watch though, you're the one who's great with a scapel. See you in twenty."  
  
"Bye Renee." I quickly pressed the end button, then thought to myself. Wait...you just invited Renee over to your house?!  
  
~~Jordan~~ By the time we had done a few laps through the park, Rudy had exhausted himself. He promptly found the nearest shaded patch of grass, dragged us both to it, then collapsed onto the ground, rolling happily on it.  
  
"He's got alot of energy huh?" Nigel handed me a waterbottle, which he had intelligently brought with us.  
  
"He sure does. No wonder it looks like you've been exercising lately!" I took the water from him, and took a sip. "Thanks."  
  
"You really think so?" Nigel sat down on the grass next to me and Rudy, and started to stratch the nearly sleeping bulldog behind the ears.  
  
"Yeah, I do think so. I wish I had one of these things...he's great!" She motioned towards the other dog owners who were running with their animals. "Look at all those people!"  
  
He nodded. "That's how I normally am, but only for about a lap or so..." Rudy quickly laid his head onto my knee, and let out a long snort.  
  
"He likes me." I glanced up at Nigel, who was smiling at me.  
  
"That's another reason he's great. Unconditional love. Tons of it."  
  
I leaned down and gave him a kiss on the nose, which only prompted another round of snorting. "He's so cute."  
  
Nigel laid on his back and stared up at the tree above him. "Yeah, he's perfect. I'm lucky I found him. He's been there for me...but not as much as you guys have."  
  
"What are you talking about Nige?"  
  
"I'm talking about you, Jordan."  
  
"When am I there for you? It seems like it's the other way around."  
  
"Lately, yes Luv, but we're all just bulldog puppies. We keep giving it and giving it."  
  
I looked down at Rudy, then over to Nigel. "I can see the resemblance already."  
  
"Hey! I thought you said I was losing weight." He sat up on one elbow.  
  
"I never said that. I said you were exercising." I smiled at him. "Thanks Nigel."  
  
"No problem Jordan. You don't have to ask."  
  
"I know. I guess we are all just like bulldog puppies."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED  
  
***THANKS FOR READING, TALK TO YOU ALL LATER, NEXT CHAPTER LOTS OF GARRET. LOTS OF GARRET. AND JORDAN.*** 


	19. Chapter 19

***Thanks for commenting...and thanks for reading...here's chapter 19!***  
  
((Right after chapter 18.))  
  
Garret's house, 3pm  
  
~~Garret~~  
  
"Dammit to hell! Don't dig THAT deep!"  
  
"You want them out, or you want to be labeled as having one too many body piercings?"  
  
I glared up at Renee. "I want them out, but you don't need to dig the tweezers in that deep. Please."  
  
"Alright, you big baby, now just hold still...this one's in here good." She grabbed my arm and pinned it to the table, and proceeded to yank a good sized chunk of glass out of my arm. "There, that didn't hurt, now did it?"  
  
"Yes. It did hurt. Just like the other ones you've taken out." I looked around my kitchen and sighed. "Top cabinet, on the left, there's a bottle of scotch. Get it."  
  
"You're working." She walked towards the cabinets.  
  
"I'm getting glass ripped out of my arm, without any painkillers. I don't care."  
  
"Fine, but when you go back to the morgue smelling like I took you out to bar, it's not gonna get pinned on me." She sat back across from me, and filled two shotglasses full of scotch.  
  
"You gonna give it to me?" I looked up at the glass sitting across the table.  
  
"Depends how you want it." She grabbed my glass and slowly pushed it towards me.  
  
"I'll take it however I can, I'll leave that up to you." I reached for the glass, but she pulled it away from my grasp.  
  
"Not...yet. One more chunk." She picked up the tweezers and grinned.  
  
"You make me so dependent." I raised my arm towards her. "Take your pick."  
  
"A man who gives his choice to a woman is often hurt in the end." She grabbed ahold of a piece of glass. "Now, hold still."  
  
The park, same time  
  
~~Jordan~~ After we ran Rudy to near death in the park, Nigel and I sat under this big tree and talked for at least an hour, just about life, how I was doing, and about the case that Nigel was working on.  
  
"So, what did you find on that cigar you brought in a few weeks ago?"  
  
"Oh, that." He paused. "The test came back, with the DNA markers showing that whoever's DNA was on it, besides the kid's, was a paternal match."  
  
"So the kid's dad?" I looked up at him.  
  
"Yeah, the only thing I don't get is, why was the kid's DNA on the cigar in the first place?"  
  
"Maybe it was the kid's blood?"  
  
"No signs of blood found anywhere on the body. No punctures, no scratches, no nothing." He rolled over onto his stomach and started playing with a blade of grass.  
  
"Saliva maybe?"  
  
"Possibly, but I did a scope into his lungs, no sign of recent smoke inhalation. And tobacco levels were so low I couldn't get a good reading."  
  
I thought for a minute, then I got an idea. "Nigel?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"You ever fight with your dad?"  
  
He grinned. "All the bloody time! We were always at it, it seems."  
  
I shook my head. "No Nigel. I mean FIGHT with your dad. Like fists and kicking..."  
  
He sat quiet for a minute, then looked up at me. "Yeah, a couple of times."  
  
I saw him look down at the grass again, and I sighed. "And?"  
  
"And what Jordan?"  
  
"What happened? Like what did you each do?"  
  
"Well, it was different each time, but always the same...kinda funny in a way." He slowly sat up and looked at me. "We'd always start off yelling at each other for some stupid reason...he'd usually get mad about something I didn't do, or something I forgot...the little things."  
  
I waited patiently, thinking to myself: I've done that before...  
  
"Then, if he'd had a few too many, he'd start wailing on me...from far away first, the occasional shove or belt smack...you know...he never really meant to hurt me, just to put me back in my place."  
  
"Did you ever fight back?"  
  
He shook his head. "Not usually, it would just make him even madder. He never did it while mum was alive...it all started after she died."  
  
"Anything worse ever happen?" I leaned back and rested against the tree trunk.  
  
"There were...two times, that I can remember, that I actually started fighting back on him. Once was after he hit me across the back with a switch...I was walking away from him and he took a shot at me, and I wasn't going to let that go too easily."  
  
"What did you do?"  
  
"I remember whipping around and lunging at him...I got a few good knocks on him...he started screaming about sending me off to an institution, the military, and then he started slugging back. He got a good one right here..." He traced his finger along his eye socket. "Gave me a shiner for two weeks."  
  
"That all?"  
  
"That was the only time I've ever seen him cry."  
  
"He was crying?" I looked up at him. "Was he too drunk to control himself?"  
  
"Nah, he knew what he was doing. As soon as he saw me hit the ground...he stopped. Like he had a double personality almost. He started freaking out...crying...I just got up and walked out of the house."  
  
"Oh. I see now. What about the other time you fought?"  
  
"He was drunk...he'd been out all night partying, sleeping around...it was the one year anniversary of me mum's death..." He sighed. "I got mad at him because he brought some tramp home...so he started yelling about how I needed to 'keep out of his business' and 'go to hell', the usual."  
  
"Why'd you fight?" I paused. "I mean, why did you FIGHT?"  
  
"I told him he was a drunken ass...and that he had no respect for mum...and all he could do was sneer at me and tell me that..."  
  
I glanced up at him, wondering why he had stopped. "Nigel?"  
  
"What?"  
  
I noticed that his eyes were watering ever so slightly. "What did he say?"  
  
"That he was glad she was dead, because she was nothing but a tight whore." He paused. "I hit him."  
  
"He deserved it!" I stared at him in shock. "He said that about your mom?"  
  
"Yes. I hit him, and we both went at it. I gave that son of a bitch two black eyes, and a few bruised ribs, I reckon."  
  
"And what'd you get?"  
  
"Bloody nose, fat lip, black eye, and the nerve to finally leave him."  
  
She raised an eyebrow. "Leave him?"  
  
"I joined the military the next day. I was nineteen, confused, and very proud of my battle scars."  
  
"You left and joined the military?"  
  
"Yep. Why Jordan, you know that..." He smiled at me.  
  
"But I didn't know why until now." She smiled back. "But one last question."  
  
"What?"  
  
"When you were fighting, did you ever spit in his face?"  
  
"A few times...yes...why does that matter though?"  
  
"Saliva, on the dad's cigar. Kid was trying to fight him off." I saw the lightbulbs in Nigel's head go on.  
  
"Jordan...I love you. This proves it."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Evidence of bruising on the upper arms of the body. He was getting held up, and he spit on the bastard."  
  
"Back to the morgue?" I stood up and offered him my hand.  
  
"Back to the morgue." He pulled himself to his feet, and smiled at me. "Thanks Luv."  
  
"Hey, it was you who figured it out. That fighting did come in handy."  
  
"I guess it did."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***Thanks for reading, sorry if its short, but this is how it came out.*** 


	20. Chapter 20

***I know, its been a whole few hours since I posted 19, but I've got some many dang ideas flowing around, they're going everywhere!***  
  
((Right after 19!))  
  
Garret's house  
  
~~Garret~~ I felt myself wince as Renee pulled one of the last pieces of glass out of my arm. Only a few were still left, and there were a couple small bits ground into my knuckles, but I could deal with those myself. I smiled up at her as she wiped the tweezers off with a paper towel, and set them on the table.  
  
"Get the ones in your hand yourself? Or do you want me to?" She smiled at me.  
  
I nodded. "I'll do them, give me the tweezers." I held out my hand.  
  
"So where's this food you were talking about having over here?" She stood up and wandered towards my fridge.  
  
"I can call and order us something, if you want anything special." I reached across the table and grabbed the tweezers myself, and I started plucking the shreds out of my hand.  
  
"Know any good Italian numbers?" She leaned into my fridge, and grabbed two beers. "Mind if I help myself?"  
  
"No, go ahead. Check on the piece of paper by the phone, there might be some good places on it." I gave my hand and arm a final check. "Finally, I'm done."  
  
"Good, now how were you planning on fixing that door in your office?"  
  
"Was the janitor even attempting to clean it up?" I walked over to the sink and ran some water, rinsing my arm off.  
  
"Not when I was there. I got a very scared Lily pretty much worshipping the piece you dropped on her desk though." She grabbed the phone? "What do you want?"  
  
"Surprise me." I turned off the water and headed out of the room. "I'm gonna go get some peroxide or something to put on this, I'll yell if I need ya."  
  
"Alright Garret."  
  
I heard her start dialing the number as I walked out of the kitchen, heading down the hall to the bathroom. I rummaged around in the cabinets until I found what I was looking for. Hydrogen Peroxide, Neosporin, and Excedrin. These would work just nicely. I unscrewed the cap of the peroxide with one hand, and as soon as I poured it on my arm, it burned like no other. I bit my lip, and attempted not to focus on my sizzling arm.  
  
"Garret, you alright in there? I got us some pasta, and some bread. Is that okay with you?" I heard Renee yelling at me from the kitchen.  
  
I only nodded my head, knowing full well that if I tried to talk, I'd scream.  
  
"Garret?" She walked into the bathroom and stood behind me. "You alright?"  
  
I shook my head, thinking to myself. No, my arms on fire, thank you very much. I finally managed to croak out an "I'm fine.", which only prompted her to look at my face in the mirror.  
  
"Let me see it." She pulled my arm away from the sink. "Too much peroxide." She pushed my arm under the faucet and turned on the water. "Rinse it out."  
  
"I am." I rinsed out the cuts, quickly turned off the water, and grabbed a towel and wrapped my arm in it.  
  
"Come out into the kitchen, I'll bandage you up. Got any suture stuff?"  
  
"Not here, I've got some at work though."  
  
"Nice try, you're lucky I keep a disposable one on me at all times. There's one in my purse." She turned and walked out of the room.  
  
"Fine, be right there." I leaned over the sink and splashed my face with the water, then I walked out after her. "Do I get Jello after my hospital stay?"  
  
"Depends on how bad I make your throat hurt with all your screaming, you big baby."  
  
((Back at the Morgue))  
  
~~Nigel~~  
  
"Jordan, can you come here, I need you to do something for me Luv." I picked up the child dummy that we kept lying around the morgue, for reasons I never thought of until now.  
  
"What Nigel?" She walked into the room, and paused when she saw me in a face shield, holding the dummy up by the arms.  
  
"You're the one good at re-enacting these things, come here." I adjusted my grip on the arms. "Stand behind the dummy.  
  
"And do what?"  
  
"Spit in my face."  
  
"WHAT?!" She laughed. "You want me to spit in your face?"  
  
"Yes, I need to get the possibility that it hit the cigar."  
  
"But Nigel! I'm older than the kid." She stood at the spot I motioned to.  
  
"That's why you're farther away. Now spit."  
  
"Alright, fine."  
  
"Jordan, wait." I dropped the dummy down.  
  
"Yes? Afraid I'll miss?"  
  
"No, afraid that it won't prove anything. So spit at me, as fast as you can, as many times as you can."  
  
"What will that prove?"  
  
I nodded. "Just do it, I'm gonna be moving, so don't try and aim, just spit."  
  
She laughed. "Alright Nige, here goes nothing."  
  
I lunged at her, and she spit at me, then continued to spit until she nearly fell over laughing.  
  
"What's so funny?" I quickly took off the face shield and laid it on the counter, and snapped a few photos of it.  
  
"I was spitting on you..."  
  
"In all the right places Jordan." I held up the mask. "He was smoking the cigar while beating on the kid. We just gotta figure out how he died."  
  
"You already autopsied him right?"  
  
"Inconclusive. Ran every test in the book, from drug to pregnancy."  
  
"You ran a pregnancy test on him?" She glared up at me.  
  
"It was the only one I hadn't done yet, so I did it."  
  
"Poisons?"  
  
"All of them." I nodded.  
  
She grabbed the case file from the countertop, and started leafing through it. "Nothing huh?"  
  
"Nothing. That's what pisses me off. We have the cigar, but no ID on the dad. We don't have a weapon, but we have where he was found." I sighed.  
  
"Wait Nigel." She held up her hand.  
  
"Yes Jordan?"  
  
"He was found in the alley right?"  
  
"Yeah, I've told you that." I looked at her. "What are you thinking?"  
  
"There's not anything that says he was killed there, Nige."  
  
I stared at her blankly, then looked down at the papers in her hands. "I cannot believe that I...bloody hell..." I grabbed onto the edge of the exam table for support. "Nigel, you stupid git..."  
  
~~Jordan~~  
  
"Nigel, what's wrong?" I reached out to give him a hand, but before I could, he looked up at me, his eyes blazing. "Nigel?"  
  
He didn't say a word, he just walked out of the exam room and down the hallway. I set my notepad down on the table, and ran out into the hallway after him. He was already out of sight by the time I got into the lobby. "Lily?"  
  
"Yes Jordan?"  
  
"Where did Nigel go?"  
  
She pointed. "The stairs."  
  
"Thanks Lily." I nodded to her, then went towards the stairs, forcing myself not to run. I slowly opened the door to the stairwell, and I heard the pounding of feet above me, then a door slam shut. I jogged up the stairs nearly two at a time, then I slowly opened the door to the roof. "Nigel? You up here?"  
  
"I'm over here Luv."  
  
I looked over, and saw him standing at the edge of the roof, looking out towards the city. I slowly walked up to him, and placed a hand on his back. "You alright Nige?"  
  
"I'm just mad."  
  
"Why?" I rubbed his back gently, even though I already knew the answer.  
  
"I let that slip. One detail, but so simple. I thought I knew it all..."  
  
"We all make mistakes Nigel. All of us miss something..."  
  
"But it was so obvious. The kid couldn't have been killed there. He didn't have any marks from the cardboard he was lying on. There was no evidence of anything going on in that alley...but I missed it."  
  
"What are you going to do now?" I snuggled up to him, trying to get him to give me a hug.  
  
"Go back to that bloody cigar store and beat the living hell out of everyone that walks in until they give me some information." He sighed. "Then, go get drunk off my ass and sleep away the next week and a half."  
  
"I know the place to help you with the second part." I smiled up at him, and he finally gave me a hug. "I know Luv. I know."  
  
"We even welcome service dogs."  
  
"You and your puppy love Jordan." He smiled at me, then his face fell, when he saw me turn away from him.  
  
All I could think about was Woody at that moment, and how great our first dance together was, and how great he was.  
  
"Oh God...I'm sorry Jordan."  
  
"It's okay, it's just still there, in the back of my mind."  
  
"And I bring it out. I'm sorry baby..."  
  
I turned around and faced him. "It's fine, really. Let's go back inside."  
  
"Alright."  
  
((back to Garret's house))  
  
~~Garret~~  
  
"Where did you learn how to administer stitches Renee?"  
  
"Girl Scouts." She deftly placed a few into one of the larger cuts on my arm. "Hurt yet?"  
  
"Nothing that can't be made better. You were in Girl Scouts?" I laughed quietly, until she stabbed me again with the needle.  
  
"Yes, looked good on the application to law school. No laughing, or you're going to be sporting some extra string in places you wish you didn't know about."  
  
I raised an eyebrow at her. "You suggesting something?"  
  
She winked. "We'll find out after Italian food."  
  
"Alright, just finish and wrap me up, alright?"  
  
"I will Garret." She closed the last of the wounds that required closing, and started to cover them with little gauze strips. "Got long bandage stuff?"  
  
The doorbell rang just as I was about to answer her, but she silenced me when I started to stand up. "I'll get it. You sit."  
  
I nodded, then leaned back in the chair. I heard her talking with the delivery guy for about a minute, then I heard the door shut, and the click of her heels as she walked back into the room.  
  
"That was about?" I grinned at her.  
  
"He was thanking me for tipping him a twenty."  
  
"A twenty? Big spender..."  
  
"Nope, he was cute." She unpacked the bag. "Pasta?"  
  
I nodded. "I've got wine." I stood up and walked over to the far cabinet on the wall, and grabbed a bottle and two glasses.  
  
"Break out the fancy stuff for me huh?"  
  
"Sure, why not. I don't plan on going back to work today, and Abby won't be here until this weekend, so who cares if I get a little drunk?"  
  
"I will, when I watch you come into work and stare at your door like you don't know what the hell happened." She passed me a plate of food. "Eat."  
  
"Yes m'am." I grabbed it from her.  
  
"I'm serious. You've lost alot of blood. You need exercise and food to help get it back."  
  
"I've got the food, where's the exercise?"  
  
"Depends on how drunk we get." She smiled at me, then started eating.  
  
"Fine, I'll eat." I started eating as well, and we both kept shooting each other looks over our forkfuls of pasta. After we had both finished, I got up to put the plates in the sink, and to rinse off the silverware.  
  
"Garret?"  
  
I turned around. "Yes Renee?"  
  
"Can two friends...you know...and still be friends?"  
  
I looked at her. "I think so..."  
  
She nodded. "Good."  
  
I turned back around, started rinsing off the plates, when she walked up behind me and kissed me on the back of the neck. I froze for a split second, then I turned off the water and turned around to face her. "Renee?"  
  
"Yes Garret?"  
  
"Do you consider us to be friends?"  
  
"Yes, I do."  
  
I nodded softly, then leaned in to kiss her myself. "Good." When I pulled back after, I looked her in the eyes, trying to get some type of reaction from her.  
  
"Garret?"  
  
"Yes Renee?" I smiled at her.  
  
"Take off the tie. You can't exercise in a tie." She leaned in and kissed me, and I smiled to myself.  
  
"Yes m'am."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***THANKS FOR READING! HOPE YOU ENJOY!!!*** 


	21. Chapter 21

***Sorry for my long absence, I was off in Alaska for 2 weeks, but now I have returned, with writing!***  
  
CHAPTER 21:  
  
(The next morning, after chapter 20)  
  
~~Garret~~ I'll have to admit, waking up next to Renee was just a little bit odd. Not to mention that my arm felt like it was on fire, but that's only second to the fact. I didn't move at first, because I didn't want to wake her up, but I was soon greeted by the annoying chirping of my pager. Then my cell phone ringing. I carefully leaned over and grabbed it, managing to answer it near silently.  
  
"Macy."  
  
"Garret? Where the hell are you?"  
  
"Good morning to you too, Jordan." I rolled on my side, away from Renee.  
  
"It's not morning anymore, and the phone is ringing off the hook here." She paused briefly. "Were you still asleep?!"  
  
"Yes, I was. What do they want?"  
  
"Well, the DA's office would like to know where Renee is, got any ideas?"  
  
I swore that I heard her snicker, and I sighed deeply. "What's in it for me?"  
  
"Did you say something Garret?" Renee stirred and snuggled up behind me, wrapping an arm around my waist.  
  
"I was just talking to Jordan. Seems your office has been looking for you." I smiled as I handed the phone to her. "See for yourself."  
  
"Hello?" Renee took the phone from me and smiled. "You're looking for me? Well, tell them I'll be in in an hour. Thanks Jordan. Bye." With that taken care of, she hung my my phone and threw it on the floor. "They always bug you this early?"  
  
"Never fails." I smiled and kissed her gently on the forehead.  
  
~~Jordan~~ As I hung up the phone, I was greeted by a very confused look from Nigel.  
  
"Find Doctor M.?" He smiled at me.  
  
"And Renee. Together."  
  
"You mean...he was...shagging her?"  
  
I nodded. "From the sound of his voice, all night long. He's wiped out."  
  
Nigel laughed as he leaned back in his chair. "He who lies with the dogs..."  
  
"Nigel, come on, give him a break."  
  
"He already had one. His window!" He shot a thumb at the now cardboard covered doorframe in Garret's office.  
  
I had to admit, that was slightly funny. "Nigel, seriously, did you get any information off my spit yesterday?"  
  
"Right. Your spit. Well, comparing the fact that the saliva from the boy was on the cigar, and showing the bruise patterns that match those of an average adult hand, you were semi-helpful."  
  
"Only semi?"  
  
"Only semi. You're not a six year old boy. At least you don't look like one."  
  
I playfully chucked a pen at his head. "What does that mean?!"  
  
"Oh nothing. Just means that you're fun to play with."  
  
"What type of play?" I took another pen out and prepared to fling it at him.  
  
"Any type you want. And those are Bug's pens."  
  
"Yes, those are my pens. Why are they getting flung around the room?" Bug walked past the door to the office he and Nigel shared and stopped.  
  
I started to talk, but Nigel butted in. "We were just playing around Buggles, no harm done."  
  
"See for yourself. They aren't your pens." With that, he walked off.  
  
I glanced out the door at Bug's retreating figure. "Nope, can't see it."  
  
"What can't you see?"  
  
I looked at Nigel. "The stick up his ass."  
  
"Jordan! That was harsh!"  
  
"I know, but it's true. Ever since last week he's been acting really moody."  
  
"I think he asked Lily out." Nigel twirled around in his chair to face his computer.  
  
"Whaaa? Bug? Ask Lily out?" Alright, this was interesting.  
  
"He said something about getting the nerve to do something, and then he got all pissy the next day. What else would he have done?"  
  
"Maybe he got...in trouble for something?"  
  
"Luv, it's Buggles. He won't get in trouble for anything around here."  
  
"True." I glanced back down at the stack of files I had kept in my hand the whole time and nodded. "I've gotta get these things signed so our fearless leader doesn't beat me."  
  
"You're right, if he's shagging Renee he IS fearless."  
  
With a final throw of a pen to Nigel's head, I walked out of his office laughing. So true, yet so amusing. Now to wait for Garret to show up so I could get his side of the story.  
  
~~Garret~~ I wonder how many people Jordan's already told about this... I thought to myself as I stepped into the elevator in the lobby. It wasn't crowded, since most everybody was already at work, being that it was almost noon. When the doors to the morgue slid open, I locked eyes with two people. A very confused Lily, and a equally confused Peter. I walked up to Emmy's desk and signed myself in as Lily approached from the right.  
  
"Hi Dr. Macy...how are you feeling today?"  
  
"Lily, I'm fine. My arm is fine, and I do not need counseling. I have alot of work to do today, so I'd appreciate it if we didn't talk about the events of yesterday alright?"  
  
"Sure Garret, I just felt that you should talk to Jordan. She's still a little shaken up over the whole thing."  
  
"What whole thing."  
  
She looked at me expectantly. "You know, yesterday, right at about eight- thirty...before Dr. Stiles got here and you hurt your arm. You went into Jordan's office and talked to her...you walked out after a minute and slammed the door remember?"  
  
I thought back to yesterday, remembering my whole tirade about how she didn't understand we were trying to help her...how we all loved her.  
  
"She didn't come out of her office for an hour...Nigel said she was crying...that was the whole reason you left after you punched your door."  
  
I remembered now. I had gone to talk to Jordan and ended up sleeping with Renee. I laughed to myself. "Great train of thought I have..."  
  
"What?" Lily looked up at me.  
  
"Nothing. You know where Jordan is?"  
  
She nodded. "In her office. She just went in there with a stack of folders to sign."  
  
"Alright, thanks Lily."  
  
"You're welcome Garret." With that, she turned and walked in the other direction, and I headed for Jordan's office.  
  
A few quick taps on the doorframe and I had her attention. "Jordan, can I come in?"  
  
She nervously looked up at me. "Sure."  
  
I walked in and shut the door behind me, then sat in one of the chairs that she had in front of her desk. I didn't say anything for a few minutes, I didn't really know what to say.  
  
"Yes Garret?"  
  
"I...wanted to ask you something."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Do you think I'm a jerk?" I shot a glance at the floor, avoiding her gaze.  
  
"No...why would I think you were a jerk?"  
  
"Jordan, seriously. Do you think I'm a jerk? I need to know."  
  
"Why would I think you were a jerk?"  
  
"For making an ass of myself and saying all that mean stuff to you."  
  
She paused. "Oh, that."  
  
"Yes that." I searched her face for signs of what she thought.  
  
"Yeah, I think you're a jerk."  
  
I knew it. "Alright."  
  
"But that doesn't mean that you're always a jerk. I forgive you. I was being stupid because I didn't want to talk to you about Woody yesterday, and I was pushing you away too hard. I didn't want you to help me." She smiled at me.  
  
"You didn't want me to help?"  
  
"No, I didn't."  
  
"Do you want my help now?" I looked up at her.  
  
She nodded, not saying a word.  
  
"Alright. You've got it." I dragged my chair around the desk and sat next to her. "I'm not as trained as Howard is, but I'm a good listener."  
  
~~Nigel~~  
  
"Peter, I need you to get me a fresh set of blades, these are getting pretty dull." I examined the blade on the scalpel I was cutting with.  
  
"Sure Nigel. I'll go run and get one out of the storeroom, we're out in here too."  
  
"Alright." I paused and snapped a few new photos of the inner lining of the trachea before grabing some tissue for a sample. It was irritated, and I was hoping I could get a trace to find out what exactly had caused the swelling. If it was smoke, I was hoping I could trace what kind, maybe even down to the type of cigar used. With that, I could pin it closer to someone at the cigar shop.  
  
"Here Nigel." Peter handed me a new set of blades.  
  
"Thanks Peter. Could you take this down to trace and have them run it. Make it an urgent case alright?"  
  
"Okay, you want me to just change? I mean, if you've got it in here..."  
  
"Sure Peter, go ahead. Just take that down there right away."  
  
"Will do." Peter quickly walked out of the room, and I glanced down at the kid's body.  
  
"I've cut you open more times than I've cut open a triple homicide case...but still no answers. Why won't you let me figure out what happened to you?" It only then struck me as odd that I was conversing with a dead body. Not that I hadn't done it before...that train wreck thing was a whole other situation...but I needed his help on this. I had to be like Jordan, and let the dead speak their tales.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I can't belive that Garret is actually in my office talking to me. This has got to be the first time that he's come to me, instead of me running into his office whining like a baby.  
  
"Jordan? Are you listening to me?" Garret touched my arm gently.  
  
"Yeah, I am. I was just thinking about what you said."  
  
"What did I say?"  
  
"That you were...having...nightmares about killing Woody."  
  
He sighed. "Good...I thought I was supposed to be helping you, not you helping me."  
  
"You aren't perfect, you need help too." I smiled. "And I'm beginning to think mental help is in order after calling you and getting to talk to Renee."  
  
He laughed. "That's up to me to decide."  
  
"I thought you didn't like her."  
  
"She has a good side. A very good side."  
  
"Well, I can see the doctor side, she must have been the one to wrap up your arm, God knows you wouldn't have done it yourself."  
  
He nodded. "Yeah, that was the reason I invited her over."  
  
"You invited her to your HOUSE?!" I let out a squeak.  
  
"What?! You think I was going to meet her at a motel or something? I wasn't planning on sleeping with her...it just kinda happened..."  
  
"You were getting glass dug out of your arm and you find that stimulating HOW?"  
  
"She's a very good nurse." He winked at me.  
  
"Oh, I don't even want to know about it Garret!" I covered my face in mock disgust.  
  
"Know about what?"  
  
We both looked up to see Renee standing in the doorway, holding a small paper bag.  
  
"Nothing, me and Garret were just talking about..."  
  
"Me. I know. I heard most of the conversation from about...meeting me at a motel." She smiled and sauntered across the room to Garret's side. "I brought you something."  
  
He raised an eyebrow. "What?"  
  
"Jello. God knows your throats gotta hurt after all the yelling you were doing last night."  
  
I instantly felt the need to gag and tried to get up to excuse myself from the room, because I was sure she was about to jump him and they were going to go at it like rabbits on my desk, and personally I didn't want to add that to my list of horrific experiences for THIS lifetime.  
  
Garret stiffled back a choke, completely in shock. He stood up and walked over with her to the doorway, and he took the bag from her hand. "Thank you Renee." With a sideways glance in my direction, he turned back to face her.  
  
"You're very welcome." She leaned in and planted a long kiss on his mouth.  
  
I was still sitting at my desk, mouth gaping, staring in shock at what I was sure was an exchange of tongues. In my office no less. I was about to say something when Garret pulled away from the kiss.  
  
"Renee, not here."  
  
"My apartment, at eight." She smiled at him  
  
"I'll be there" He gently placed another kiss on her lips, and I watched as he had to fight himself to pull away from that one.  
  
"Great." Renee smiled, then looked over at me. "See you later Jordan. Garret."  
  
"Bye Renee." Garret watched as she walked down the hall, and then turned back to me.  
  
I probably had a look on my face that combined being ready to pass out, throw up, and kill myself all at the same time.  
  
"Jordan?" He waved a hand in front of my face.  
  
I didn't answer him.  
  
"Jordan?! You alive? Or did the thought of me having a sex life kill you?!"  
  
I shook my head. "No, but you saying that just did."  
  
"Well, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to kiss her in here either."  
  
"Sure." I raised an eyebrow up at him. "Jello?"  
  
"You don't want to know Jordan."  
  
"Oh, I think I already do, seeing you two get all up on each other in my doorway was proof enough."  
  
He sank down into the chair next to me. "I'm sorry Jordan..."  
  
I put my hand on his shoulder. "It's alright. You're a big boy now. You can have a sex life."  
  
"Thanks for permission."  
  
"You're welcome." I smiled at him again. "You going to share that Jello?"  
  
He shook his head. "Nope. I need it. My throat hurts."  
  
"Sick."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED:  
  
***THANKS FOR READING I KNOW IT WAS SHORT AND STRANGE, BUT I'M BACK!*** 


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: sorry for the long break, I was busy...but now we're back in business!  
  
A/N #2: This takes place...just a few days after chapter 21. In the morgue for the most part...so yeah, I don't own them, I'm just using them for your enjoyment!  
  
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Chapter 22  
  
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~~Jordan~~ Everyone has been a bit...off lately. Well...except Garret, but hell, I have no intentions of finding out why. Speaking of Garret...where is he? Last time I checked he was in autopsy with Bug, but now Bug's in his office...oh well, no worries about it.  
  
"Jordan, I have those lab results for the Peterson case." Peter walked into my office holding a manilla folder in his hands. "But, they're pretty inconclusive."  
  
"So you were looking at my files?"  
  
"I ran them...and I picked the papers out of the printer so yes, I looked at them."  
  
I smiled at him. "Alright. You're forgiven. But--you have to be punished."  
  
"What do you want? And no, I don't do dishes, laundry, or give massages."  
  
"You, good sir, have to go with me to lunch." I playfully jabbed a finger at him.  
  
"Jordan, I'd love to, but...I'm busy at lunch." He looked out into the hallway.  
  
"With?" I followed his gaze, stopping at the lanky form of our resident Englishman. "Nigel?"  
  
"He wants to talk about something with me. I have no clue...but he asked me to stay here at lunch and not go out."  
  
"Well then...got any cash?"  
  
"Yeah, here." He quickly forked over twenty bucks, smiling. "Treat yourself."  
  
Snatching the money off my desk, I grabbed my keys and my purse, heading for the door. "Will do! You sure you don't want anything?"  
  
"Positive."  
  
"Alright then, see you later." I exited my office with a flick of my hair, pretending to be a world renowned model, and sauntered over to Garret's doorway.  
  
"Knock-knock, delivery for a Dr. Macy." I grinned at him.  
  
"Yes Jordan?" He leaned back in his chair, obviously tired of sitting and signing the latest stack of request forms piled on his desk.  
  
"You want to come to lunch with me? Peter's treat." I waved the twenty in the air. "He lost."  
  
Standing and pulling on his jacket, he shook his head. "I'm afraid to know what he lost."  
  
"Awww come on Garret, I'm not as dirty minded as you think...besides you're the one sleeping with..."  
  
"None of your business Jordan...you're stepping on some toes with that one."  
  
We walked down the hall and waited for the elevator to arrive.  
  
"You think that's stopped me before?" I winked at him.  
  
As we got onto the elevator, he shook his head. "I can't ever stop you. But...how about Chinese?"  
  
~~Peter~~ As soon as Jordan and Dr. Macy left, Nigel nearly pounced on me, practically dragging me to the staircase and up to the roof. I was pretty weirded out at first...I mean, he'd never been acting so weird, at least to me before. When we got to the roof, he checked to make sure no one else was up there--only then did he stop and breathe.  
  
"What's all this about Nigel?" I glared at him.  
  
"I need you to do me a favor, and nobody else can know about it."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because...it's complicated." He looked out at the midday Boston skyline.  
  
"Well, dragging me up here to talk about sure seems like you were going to spill it. So go."  
  
"I need you to cover for me."  
  
I raised an eyebrow "Cover you? Like for a shift? That's not that secretive..."  
  
"No. I'm going to go do something that I technically shouldn't be doing. You're going to know about it. And you're going to keep your mouth shut."  
  
"So you can order me around now?" I had to admit, I was a little ticked at the way I was being treated.  
  
"I'm not ordering you Winslow. I'm asking you. And I'll probably end up begging you in a few minutes."  
  
After a few minutes of brief, awkward silence, he spoke again.  
  
"I'm sorry mate...I just really need you to help me with this. You're the only one who I can trust not to tell Jordan or Garret.  
  
"Nigel...what are you planning on doing?"  
  
"Well...you remember that case I was working on right?"  
  
I nodded. "The one with that kid?"  
  
He nodded as he paced on the rooftop, kicking tiny pebbles with his feet. "Yeah, that one."  
  
I nodded, attempting to get him to elaborate -just- a little bit more. I mean, hell, if I was going to risk my skin to save his ass, I wanted details. Just like any normal, sane person would want.  
  
"I know where his dad is."  
  
"That's great! Call the cops and bust in on him! You can finally get that case over with." I smiled at him, but I was a little worried when he didn't share the sentiment. "Nigel?"  
  
"I want to catch him myself."  
  
I stood and watched him pace, noticing the obvious change in his body language, his posture stiffening, his fists balled tightly. This was bad. This was REAL bad. If Nigel went out and tried to go vigilante on this bastard...Garret would have his head, and so would every cop within a ten mile radius. I nodded. "So what do you mean by 'catch him'?"  
  
"I mean let that damn son of a bitch feel what it's like to be beat on...what its like to realize you messed with the wrong kid."  
  
"That's what I was afraid of." I shook my head. "Nigel, you know you can't do that. You'll be in trouble from the moment you touch him. The cops will be on your ass...nevermind Garret and Renee. She'll dig into you faster than a cat grabs it's mouse."  
  
"I know I shouldn't do it. But I can do whatever I damn well please. I'm going to do it, with or without your help. But your help will only make it easier."  
  
I sighed. "Knowing you are doing this is going to kill me. If you were to...kill the guy I could be convicted of...reckless endangerment...conspiring to commit...or even murder. You want me to risk my job and pretty much my reputation to let you go kick some guy's ass?"  
  
"Pretty much." He shrugged his shoulders.  
  
"You have got to be kidding me! You're willing to lose your job, get thrown in prison...even get deported back to England just for this stupid kid?! You're crazy!"  
  
Nigel walked over to me and stood up in my face. His eyes were red, his face tense. He probably would have hit me had I even breathed on him. "You take that back."  
  
I glared up at him, fire in my eyes as well. Sure, he was a few inches taller than me, but I was just as mad. Here Nigel was, threatening me to keep my mouth shut...this was crap. Puffing myself up to nearly match his height, I shook my head. "No."  
  
"Fine then. Don't help me. But when Garret gets chewing on your ass about you and your little drug habits...don't come crying to me for help."  
  
I stood in shock. He had NOT just said that. With a quick twitch of my head, I shook his words out of my mind. I nearly growled my reply. "I don't do that anymore..."  
  
"Still. Don't come crying to me." With that said, he turned and walked out, re-entering the building and heading back down to the morgue.  
  
I quickly followed suit, yelling at him as he descended the staircase. "You're a stupid fool Nigel! You're gonna go get yourself hurt and it is ALL your fault for being an ass!"  
  
"Just because I have morals and I'm not a little wanker like you, doesn't mean you have to be jealous!" He yelled back.  
  
"I'm not jealous you prick! And YOU have MORALS?! You want to go beat the crap out of some loser and you think you have morals!"  
  
Nigel quickly slammed the door to the ninth floor, where the morgue was, behind him. I was only a flight of stairs behind, but he was gone, and into a elevator by the time I got into the the main section of hallway. I quickly pulled my cell phone out and punched in Dr. Macy's number. I had to get this stopped, before someone else got hurt.  
  
I impatiently listened as the phone rang, and I almost threw it across the room when it took him several rings to answer.  
  
"This is Macy."  
  
"Garret, it's Peter."  
  
"What do you need? The whole morgue hasn't fallen into hell in the hour I've been at lunch, has it?"  
  
I didn't answer him.  
  
"Peter? What's wrong?"  
  
"Nigel's in trouble."  
  
TBC...  
  
**thanks for reading!** 


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: Well, here's 23! Hope you all like it! I'm on a wild ride, with my muse at the wheel!  
  
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Chapter 23  
  
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((takes place right after 22...))  
  
~~Garret~~  
  
"He's what?!"  
  
"He's in trouble..."  
  
"What kind of trouble Peter?" I glanced up at Jordan across the table. We'd just been discussing the pros and cons of an office romance when my cell phone had rang, complete with a very shaken Peter.  
  
"It's about that case he had...with the kid that was abused...we got into an argument on the roof and he told me that he was going to go get the kid's father himself."  
  
"What do you mean by get?" I waved Jordan off as she tried to lean in to listen in on my phone.  
  
"He said he was going to teach the bastard a lesson...I'm afraid he's going to do something stupid."  
  
"You're probably right. I'll be back in a few minutes." With that, I flipped my phone closed and was quickly greeted with a hissed string of words from Jordan.  
  
"Who's in trouble Garret...you tell me right now or you'll hav-"  
  
I cut her off. "Calm yourself. It's Nigel." I stood, handing a few twenties to the waiter.  
  
"Keep it." Grabbing my coat, and Jordan grabbing her purse and keys, we headed out into the parking lot, climbing into the Explorer.  
  
"Where?" She looked at me as she started the engine.  
  
"Morgue. We've gotta get the address of the father's residence. With luck we can get there before Nigel get's himself so deep into a hole that he can't get out."  
  
"Alright." She backed out of the parking lot, and headed straight for our building. A quick trip up the elevator, and I was headed straight for the office he and Bug shared.  
  
I needed to find something with his address on it. I didn't care what it was, it just had to be something. I rifled through the papers on his desk with no luck. Calling out, to no one in particular, I asked for help. What I got was a Peter, a Bug, and a Jordan.  
  
"Do any of you know where Nigel went? Bug?"  
  
"I just got here and got confronted by Peter...what's going on?"  
  
"I didn't confront you I asked you a question!"  
  
"Yeah, you nearly had me pinned to the wall to do it!"  
  
I shook my head. You're always dealing with the petty things...the bickering never ceases... "Stop it, both of you. This is serious. If Nigel messes up he could face felony charges. Now where is he?"  
  
Jordan stepped into the mix. "I say we goto the Plaza and have them run a search just for the case address. No mention of Nigel being there, just for our records."  
  
Peter looked at her. "You think that will work?"  
  
She nodded. "I can get Eddie to run it."  
  
"Alright then. Let's go. Peter, you stay here and run look for more information. Dig though trashcans, put together shredded paper, I don't care. If you find anything call me."  
  
"Yes Dr. Macy." With that, he started looking through the piles on Nigel's desk.  
  
"Jordan, you're coming with me."  
  
"I figured as much. You don't have the right stuff to get what we need."  
  
"Just go get in the car." I nudged her towards the door.  
  
"Yes, sir. Right away sir." She mockingly saluted me and then marched out of the room.  
  
I followed, running the situation through my head, and attempting to figure out why I shouldn't skin Nigel the moment I saw him next.  
  
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A cigar shop in South Boston...  
  
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~~Nigel~~ It took all I had in me not to run in and start throwing punches to anyone in the joint. I sat outside for a good ten minutes, just watching, until I saw the same crowd of men that I had seen when I had last been there drive up. Yeah, this was them. Same rotten scum who'd blew the kid's picture off. And one of them was the bastard who'd killed him himself. Containing the growing rage inside of me, I carefully climbed out of my truck and jogged across the street, entering the shop slowly.  
  
The air inside stunk with the smell of cigars, and I could hear a group of voices coming through the door into the back room. Crossing to the counter, I carefully picked up a cigar and turned it over in my fingers, waiting for someone to come out and see who I was.  
  
I got so zoned out in my own thoughts that I didn't hear the owner trying to get my attention for a few minutes.  
  
"Hey, man! You gonna buy that thing?!"  
  
I turned and came face to face with the man who ran the shop. He wasn't the father. "No, I was just looking."  
  
"Looking for anything in particular?"  
  
Just then, the men came out into the main part of the store and slowly looked me over. There were five of them, plus the kid's dad. Sure, they were all big...but I wasn't worried about that at the moment. Silently wishing that I'd brought a gun or some other weapon to protect myself, I set the cigar down and approached the men.  
  
"I was actually looking for you." I nodded my head in the dad's direction.  
  
"For me?" He looked back at his friends. "He knows who I am guys."  
  
"Yeah. You're the lousy son of a bitch who killed his own son."  
  
His mouth dropped and he turned his head back to me.  
  
"You heard me. You're a lousy son of a bitch."  
  
Throwing his cigar on the floor and crushing it with his boot, he stepped up into my face. "You know a little too much, I'm afraid."  
  
"Oh yeah? Well, then you might want to just give up. God know's every cop in town in going to find your little gang here...and then we'll finally be able to put your son to rest."  
  
"He shoulda been put to rest a long time ago. That's why I killed the little brat. But you want to know the best part?"  
  
I shook my head.  
  
"I enjoyed pounding on him just to hear his ribs snap like the puny little twig that he was."  
  
Without even thinking, I threw at a stiff hook that landed straight on his jaw. He staggered back, and his motley crew rushed forwards at me.  
  
I jumped back, and put up my fists again. Hell, if I was gonna go down, I was gonna go down fighting. I didn't spend those years in the military for nothing.  
  
"Don't touch him." Rubbing his jaw, he pushed the other men aside. "The bastard's mine."  
  
"But it's my pleasure." That comment was instantly met with a shot to the ribs, then a few more to the face. Tasting the salty taste of blood in my mouth, I wiped my lip and then lunged at him. I landed several good hits before his ruffians grabbed me and threw me out into the alley on the side of the building.  
  
It's broad daylight, and you're outside boxing with the Irish mob... I only had a second to think before I had to defend myself from six guys instead of the one I had been fighting a moment before. I started to notice the swelling in my eyes, and the pain I knew could only come from broken ribs. I turned on the men and threw a few more punches, some connecting, some not. I was seriously debating in my head whether or not to turn and leave to my car when I was tackled by the leader himself.  
  
We scuffled on the asphalt for a few minutes, kicks and punches bouncing off each other like it was nobody's business. After I managed to throw him off of me, I flipped him off and walked down to the end of the alley out into the street. They wouldn't care come out of their black hole and face me on the streets.  
  
Or at least I thought they wouldn't.  
  
They all came, a darkened wave rushing upon me from the end of the alley. Glancing around, I saw a few people walking down the street on the other side, giving me weird looks. I stared back at them, then diverted my gaze to the glint of metal I saw in the darkness of the alley.  
  
The father kept his arm down until he emerged from the alley. With a few quick glances, he raised his arm and I found myself staring down the barrel of a loaded .44 Magnum. "Get out of here."  
  
I stood my ground. If I left, they'd disappear into the woodwork forever like the termites that they were. If I stayed, I had the likelihood of getting shot.  
  
"Fine. Be that way." The man turned and opened fire on the pedestrians on the other side of the street. "They'll die then."  
  
He had to be crazy. Gunning people down in broad daylight. I was about to yell for someone to call an ambulance when I felt a shocking pain in my abdomen. I looked down to see 3 distinct bullet holes in my shirt.  
  
They stopped shooting.  
  
Grabbing at my stomach, I collapsed to the pavement. I saw the men all retreat into the cigar shop, and I felt the hands of a stranger on my body.  
  
"Don't worry, I've called an ambulance...they'll be here soon. Stay with me buddy...don't pass out...come on..."  
  
Lying my head on the sidewalk, I glanced with my eyes and saw the puddle of red coating the sidewalk. I felt myself go weak, and then it was black.  
  
********************  
  
At the Police Plaza.  
  
********************  
  
~~Garret~~ After finally weaseling our way into Eddie's office, we were just about to get him to run the trace information when his and everyone's radio's crackled to life.  
  
"Reported shooting in South Boston. 4385 Scott Alley off the expressway. One man down. Repeat shooting in South Boston."  
  
I looked at Jordan, and I nearly got sick to my stomach. This was not a good feeling I had, and I knew Jordan didn't like it either.  
  
"Scott Alley...that's where the body of the kid was found." Eddie perked up when the computer printed out the results.  
  
I nodded. "I know. That's Nigel."  
  
TBC...... 


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: Hey! Welcome back! This chapter takes place right after 23, and it's in a few different places...so here we go!  
  
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Chapter 24  
  
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Boston University Medical Center. 3:41 pm  
  
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~~Jordan~~ I nearly passed out when Eddie's radio confirmed that Nigel was indeed the one who had been shot. After some quick phone calls to figure out what ambulance was dispatched, and where he was going to be taken, I dragged Garret out to my Explorer. "We're going, now." I stated as if it wasn't an obvious fact.  
  
"Yes, we are. But you're not driving." He held out his hands for my keys.  
  
"You don't know how to drive an Explorer."  
  
"I'll learn. Besides, you're shaking."  
  
I extended my hand and realized that yes, indeed, I was shaking. I was just so nervous about everything I had blocked the outside world out. Nodding, I handed my keys to him.  
  
He unlocked my door and opened it for me, then quickly ran around and climbed into the driver's seat.  
  
We drove in near silence, each not wanting to say what was on our hearts and minds.  
  
I'm not ready to lose another friend...I'm not ready to lose another friend. I'm not ready to lose...anyone. I silently thought to myself. If Nigel...dies...then I'll be without one less person in my life...everyone around me dies...  
  
~~Garret~~ I stole the occasional glance at Jordan whenever traffic was a bit backed up. She was obviously lost in thought...but it was thoughts that I knew she shouldn't be thinking. Come on Sweetheart...you've gotta relax. Just think positive...you know he's gonna be fine. The ambulance was right there and he's going to Boston U... I was about to think more, but she interrupted me.  
  
"You need to get away from me Garret."  
  
"Jordan? What are you talking about?"  
  
"Anyone who gets close to me get's hurt..."  
  
I stopped at the red light and waited...thinking about what I could say to her.  
  
"You know that's not true." Damn. That was the best you could come up with?  
  
She sniffled back a tear. "But look at Woody...and my mom...and now Nigel..."  
  
"You're not responsible for that."  
  
"But it's too damn conicidental!" She let out a weak sob as she nearly burst into tears.  
  
Taking the steering wheel with my left hand, I reached over with my right hand and placed it on the center console.  
  
She took it willingly, and I held it as we drove to the hospital. I was hoping the calm side of Jordan we were seeing now would stay the same once we got there.  
  
I hoped for too much.  
  
Before we had even entered the doors, she was scheming a way to get up into the back...even trying to get into surgery with him. It took all I had in me just to tell her to stop.  
  
"They're going to throw us out if you run around demanding that you see him right away. He's been shot. He's going to need extensive surgery...probably a blood tranfusion or two. You're going to need to wait it out."  
  
"But what if he doesn't make it?!"  
  
I stopped cold in my tracks. "He's going to make it. And you had better start praying that he does because he's going to need all the help he can get."  
  
"But...Garret...you know about me and religion...we just don't mesh together."  
  
"Then start."  
  
With that, I crossed into the hospital lobby and headed straight for the front desk. After properly identifying myself as the Chief Medical Examiner for the Boston area, and Jordan as one of my employees, I was quickly permissioned to head up to the surgery waiting room. I scribbled a list of people who were also allowed to be in there with us. Lily, Bug, Peter, Eddie, Emmy...and Max. Nearly leaving Renee off, (I figured she could bitch her way in if she had to) I added her at the last moment.  
  
Grabbing Jordan off her cell phone and dragging her into the hallway, we quickly walked towards the elevators which I knew led to the surgery floor.  
  
That's the problem with having a knowledge of medicine. It's too hard to be hopeful if you know the circumstances.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I had just gotten off the phone with Lily, and I'd already called my dad and told him, when Garret nearly pulled me along to follow him.  
  
"What's going on?" I whispered at him.  
  
"We've been giving permission to go up to the surgery waiting room. Just come."  
  
We walked quickly, and we staked out an area with a large cluster of couches and I got to work rearranging them while Garret went and requested that a doctor come and speak to us once everyone got here.  
  
But that was the thing--we had to wait for everyone to get here. I was already positioned on the couch nearest the wall when he walked over and sank down on the couch across from me. Giving him the puppy dog eyes, I motioned for him to come sit near me.  
  
~~Garret~~ The look in her eyes was too tempting. I stood and slowly stepped over to the other couch. I sat down next to her, and I quickly leaned my head back to stare at the ceiling. I had no idea how long it was going to take for information...and no idea how long it would take everybody to get here. I felt her shift her body closer to mine and she leaned her head on my shoulder. Sitting up and wrapping an arm around her, we just sat in silence.  
  
A good hour passed before anybody showed up. Peter was the first one to enter the room, followed by Bug and Lily. With a quick glance, they spotted us and shuffled over. Nods and looks were enough to let them know that we didn't have anymore information yet. We sat in silence...Bug and Lily on one couch, Peter in a chair, and me and Jordan on the other couch.  
  
Another hour.  
  
By now, Max and Renee had arrived. Not together, but close in time. Max went straight for Jordan, and Renee motioned for me to come away from the group to talk.  
  
"Garret. We need Nigel to make an id on the people who did this to him."  
  
"Renee...not now..."  
  
"Yes now. If he can't do it then the police have no substance to hold them on."  
  
"You're the evil DA you think of something." I was about to saw something else when the doors to the hall opened. Yeah, so they'd opened about fifty times since we'd been there, but this time I knew.  
  
Crossing the room back to the group, I sat next to Jordan again and waited for the doctor to speak.  
  
"I take it you're all here to hear about our...Nigel Townsend. Correct?"  
  
"Yeah." A chorus of positive answers went up from the whole group.  
  
"Well, I have some basic information on him. This is all just preliminary stuff. We won't know details until after he comes out of surgery." He paused. "Good news or bad news first?"  
  
I glanced around the group. "Good." I frankly was surprised that there was any good news at all.  
  
"Well, he's alive."  
  
Jordan glanced up at him. "And?"  
  
"There is no 'and'. The rest is bad news."  
  
"So? Tell us..." I was nearly pleading with the man.  
  
"He's pretty messed up. Aside from the bruising and broken ribs he recieved from fighting...he was shot three times in the abdomen, with two of the bullets passing straight through the cavity, missing all vital organs and coming out through his back."  
  
Jordan put two and two together. "What about the third bullet?"  
  
"It entered at such an angle...that after passing through the body cavity it did not pass through the other side of the body."  
  
"Where did it land?" Lily quietly spoke up, for the first time that evening.  
  
"It struck one of his lower vertabra and got lodged near his spinal cord."  
  
I heard Jordan gasp, and I myself stiffened when he said it.  
  
"Is he...gonna be paralysed?" Max stepped towards Jordan as he heard her gasp.  
  
"With the severe amount of swelling right now, we can't be sure. We're giving him a constant flow of an anti-inflammitory to try to keep the tissues and cords alive, but there is a good chance he'll never walk again."  
  
I felt all the blood drain out of my body when he mentioned those words.  
  
"Do you have any questions?"  
  
"Can we see him yet?" Jordan, who was snuggled into her dad's arms, managed to speak a few words.  
  
"He's still in surgery to remove the final bullet. After he gets out...you should be able to visit him, one at a time, for a few minutes each. He'll probably be asleep--he needs to stay that way." With that said, and no more questions to be asked, he turned and went back through the swinging doors.  
  
I stood silently and walked away from the group. I needed to be on my own for a little while, just so I could collect my thoughts and calm my nerves.  
  
I found myself standing outside the door to the hospital's chapel. I stayed still for a moment, then I slowly pushed the door open.  
  
Entering the darkened room, I walked to a pew in the back and sat. I stared straight ahead at a small cluster of candles burning in the front, and then I looked around and noticed there were only a few other people in the room. Bowing my head, I silently spoke a multitude of prayers. Not quite knowing what to say, I just spoke whatever popped into my head.  
  
After about ten minutes, I stood and walked out of the room. I was surprised to see Renee standing in the hall outside the door, waiting for me.  
  
"I figured you want to talk outside, after you were done in there."  
  
In fact, that had been just what I was thinking, so I nodded. "Yeah...that would be nice."  
  
Once we outside, we walked in the courtyard, but didn't talk. The sun was beginning to set, and there were only a few small children and their parents on the other end of the grass. I turned and looked at Renee.  
  
I don't know what she sensed, but she immediately hugged me, wrapping her arms around my back.  
  
I sank into her grasp, so emotionally drained that I didn't care if anyone happened to see the DA and the CME in a hug.  
  
~~Nigel~~ So...bright...damn lights.... I groggily opened my eyes to see several figures crowded around me. I had no clue where I was, how I got there, or why I was in so much pain. I couldn't speak due to the various tubes running down my throat...but my eyes could tell about my pain.  
  
I heard voices talking to me, but I don't remember what they were saying. I felt liquid being shot into my veins, and I felt myself falling asleep again. At least the pain is gone...  
  
TBC...... 


	25. Chapter 25

A/N: Takes place in the hospital, five hours later. The group hasn't gotten anymore information on Nigel, and they're frankly quite pissed off about it.  
  
**********  
  
Chapter 25  
  
**********  
  
~~Jordan~~ I guess I must have fallen asleep because I woke up to Garret telling me that my dad was leaving. Groggily rubbing my eyes, I think I mumbled a few various swears at sleeping on a couch before I realized what I was doing. Looking around, I could see that Renee was on the couch across from me, Peter was thumbing through a magazine while perched in a chair, Lily and Bug were nowhere to be seen. Garret of course was next to me, attempting to get me to come back into the realm of semi-conciousness.  
  
With another nudge, I finally relented and acknowledged that I knew my father had left and that I indeed was awake. Then it was on the the next question.  
  
"Can we go see Nigel yet?" I looked up at Garret, even as he was still slightly blurred in my sleepy vision.  
  
"No, we can't. We haven't gotten any more information on him either. Last time I checked with nurse, she mumbled something about more surgery, but who knows. We'll probably find out something soon."  
  
Peter pulled himself out of his chair and smiled at me. "Morning Jordan. Want anything from over there?" He nodded over his shoulder at the vending area which I knew had to contain coffee in one form or another.  
  
Nodding happily, I let it be known that, yes, I am addicted to caffiene and it's after-effects.  
  
"Coffee Jordan?" Garret asked.  
  
Ok, so maybe Garret didn't get that my excited head bobbing meant yes for coffee, but I had to admit, he did look pretty tired. "Yes Garret, I figured the head twitches would be enough of a signal to you."  
  
"Hey. We speak in verbal language too you know. I'm not fluent in "Jordan" yet."  
  
"You want anything Garret?" Peter started walking over towards the coffeepot on the counter while speaking.  
  
"No, thanks. I've had enough already while I've been here. Jordan, on the other hand passed out on the couch and didn't wake up until I nearly resorted to the old water trick."  
  
"You wouldn't have." I stood, now realizing my sudden need to use the bathroom. I knew I shouldn't have had those three Cokes at lunch... "I'll be right back guys."  
  
"Alright Jordan. Your coffee will be here when you do get back." Peter walked off to get the coffee while I made a mad dash to the bathrooms.  
  
After finishing that business, I made it a point to make myself look semi- presentable. Standing at the sink, staring into the mirror, I sighed. The face that was staring back was obviously not very happy. My hair was a frizz-ball of immense proportions, and that's not mentioning my lack of makeup.  
  
I leaned down and splashed my face with the water. After a quick rinse, I pulled my hair into a normal position and set on attacking it with my hairbrush. It only took about 10 minutes, but I quickly pulled it up into a bun. There. Much better.  
  
I headed back out into the lobby to see Garret, Peter, and Renee in the middle of a conversation with the same doctor we'd been talking to earlier. I hurried over and just caught the tail end of the conversation, but I was clueless as the doctor walked away.  
  
"What's going on?"  
  
Garret smiled. "We can go see Nigel now. The doctor's going to send a nurse to escort us to his room in a few minutes after they have everything in order. We can only go in one or two at a time though...normally. But since the doctor understands that we're professionals and he knows we're not going to mess him up, he's been kind enough to give us permission to all see him at once."  
  
"Oh, that's great...did he say how long it was going to take for the nurse to get here?" I smiled back. At least we got to go see him now...no more waiting.  
  
"Only a few minutes."  
  
We stood around for a few moments, and we all jumped when we heard the doors behind us swing open again.  
  
Upon seeing us, a short, blonde-haired woman in a white lab coat motioned for us to follow her. She began to talk, laying out some base rules for visiting Nigel and what not to touch, etc.  
  
After a trip up the elevators to the ICU floor, we walked down a series of hallways until we arrived outside of room 596. I noticed that Nigel's full name and ID number were typed up on a sheet of paper which was clipped to the door.  
  
"Now, you can go in, but I need to tell you something." The nurse kept a firm grip on the doorhandle, probably afraid we were going to rush her to get inside. "Most people, upon seeing their friends in this situtation get a little freaked out. He's hooked up to alot of machines. He's got wires and tubes running just about everywhere, so be mindful of what you touch. He is also in a full body restraint, to disable him from moving and possibly damaging his spinal cord. Add the bandages and the bruises all over his face, and you're probably all going to be a bit unnerved."  
  
"We're medical examiners. We've seen alot." Peter, who'd been silent through the woman's speech, spoke up.  
  
"You'll see Peter. It's different when it's someone you know." Garret nodded at Peter, then looked at the nurse. "So...can we go in?"  
  
She opened the door and smiled. "Go right ahead. Just remember what I told you. And try to let him sleep. He probably won't wake up for a while due to his medication but you never know."  
  
"Thank you very much m'am." I smiled at her, then walked inside.  
  
~~Garret~~  
  
The room was darkened, save for the soft glow of a few small lights that were turned on. The group crossed the room to his bedside, not saying a single word. Upon seeing him firsthand however, Peter visibly flinched, while Jordan and Renee stood stiffly by the edge. I shot a glance over at Peter, who's face was obviously paled. I took a side-step towards him and gently placed my hand on his back. "It's fine, don't worry about it."  
  
I then moved to one of the four chairs that had been set up around his bed and slowly sat in one. I have to admit, seeing him like this was very hard.  
  
His face (well, what you could see where there was no bandages) was pretty bruised up. I could spot the telltale signs of a black eye, and his lip had a few good knicks in it as well. His neck and head were firmly held in place by an assortment of straps.  
  
The thin blanket had been pulled up to his waist before he'd been strapped to the backboard. He didn't have a robe on, so he technically was shirtless, but the mass of bandages and wires concealed almost all skin on his chest. I slowly looked from his face to his chest, almost afraid that I'd see gushing wounds.  
  
He looked so fragile, strapped to the backboard, wires and tubes running everywhere. He was even on a respirator machine. I noticed that Jordan had taken his one free hand in hers and she was holding it gently. I also swore that she had tears forming in her eyes, but then again, who didn't.  
  
Stealing at glance at Renee, I saw something in her face that I hadn't ever seen before. I don't know what it was, but it was different. The steady hiss and hum of the ventilator, combined with the several various beeps that the other machines were emitting settled into a rythm, just like we all did while sitting there.  
  
Peter left after about half an hour, claiming that he needed to run home and get a shower and something to eat. Renee was quick to follow, as her pager went off merely minutes after he had left.  
  
"Sorry Garret, but I've got to get back to work. Promise me you'll call if anything happens alright?"  
  
"I will, don't worry."  
  
"I'll see you later then." She planted a soft kiss on my forehead, then headed out of the room. "Bye Jordan."  
  
"Bye Renee." Jordan turned her head and smiled.  
  
We sat in silence for a few minutes, neither of us really in the mood to talk. But the silence was to be short-lived.  
  
"Garret?"  
  
I looked up to see Jordan's eyes filling with tears. "Yes sweetheart?"  
  
"Could you...come sit on this side...I want to be close to somebody."  
  
I stood and walked around the end of his bed. "Of course I will. This alright?" I sat in the chair which Renee had just vacated, pulling it right next to Jordan.  
  
"Perfect."  
  
I reached over and placed my hand on her back. Rubbing it softly, I started to think about everything that she'd been through in the last few months. I was completely absorbed in my own head and didn't realize that Jordan was now crying.  
  
"I'm so sorry Garret...for all the crap I've put you and everybody else through...all the stuff about Woody was my own fault and I was too emotionally messed up to be professional about it."  
  
"Baby, don't be sorry. I don't care about any of it...I want to help you when the times are rough. It makes it easier on the both of us."  
  
"Why is that? I never want to let you help me." She sniffled back another tear.  
  
"Helping you, it makes me realize how lucky I am to work with the people I do and do my job. The fact that I can help someone is the best feeling in the world to me."  
  
"But I can't ever help. I want that feeling too..."  
  
"Then help Nigel." I smiled at her.  
  
"What? How?"  
  
"Just sit here. Talk to him. Let him know that someone is out here with him and that they love him. The feeling that people care about you can't be taken away is someone is right there making it a reality." I paused. "And you'd better feel it, because if you don't I've been a pretty bad friend."  
  
"You haven't been a bad friend." She leaned over and rested her head on my shoulder.  
  
"You're my bestest girlfriend."  
  
"Thanks Jordan."  
  
We sat in silence, her holding his hand, me rubbing Jordan's back. He'd wake up. It was just a matter of time.  
  
TBC.....  
  
****Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed! Comments are always liked b/c it lets me know what I'm doing right (or wrong)! Thanks!**** 


	26. Chapter 26

A/N: Thanks for reading chapter 25, and we're on to 26!  
  
**********  
  
Chapter 26  
  
**********  
  
Nigel's room, right after 25!  
  
*****************************  
  
~~Garret~~ I sat there rubbing Jordan's back for a good hour or so, until she fell asleep, curled in the chair. She looked so much like a child, with her dark brown hair falling in front of her face. She reminded me of Abby, and how she'd fallen asleep in my office several times while waiting for me to get off work. Curled up, trying to fend off the outside world...  
  
I was so absorbed in thought I had to be shook back into conciousness by the hosptial nurse who'd come to check Nigel's vitals. After making sure that I wasn't the one in need of medical attention, she moved to the bedside and began writing his vitals down on his chart.  
  
"How bad is it?" I softly spoke up, not wanting to wake Jordan.  
  
"Excuse me sir?" She turned, drawing her gaze from Nigel to me.  
  
"How bad is it?"  
  
After a moment of reading over the charts, she shook her head. "I can't say for sure, but if a shard of bullet even grazed his spinal cord, he'll never walk again. That's our main concern now."  
  
I nodded slowly. I thought to myself: "At least he's alive..." In that method of thinking, it was positive. Planning to keep that thought in my head, I glanced up at Nigel lying on the bed. It was going to be tough.  
  
The nurse gave me a smile, then exited the room with chart in hand. I moved my chair closer to Nigel's side and I gently took his free hand in mine. Holding it gently, not quite sure what to do, I sat there and stared at his face. Battered and bruised, I could see the weaknesses and imperfections scattered across it's surface. Closing my eyes and bowing my head, I decided that the next best thing to do would be to pray.  
  
~~Nigel~~ I felt myself drifting back into a state of conciousness, but there was no will to awaken. My eyes would not open. I could feel someone holding my hand, and I could hear the softly muttered words of that person. Lying helpless on the bed, I fought with myself to try and wake up. It was like I was trapped in my own body. I felt the tubes running into my lungs, the throbbing pain behind my eyes, and I had the faint taste of blood in my mouth.  
  
Opening my eyes, the world around me became a blurr of light. My eyes reeled in pain, and had I been able to speak, I would have been yelling. I stirred slightly, to attempt to get Garret (I could now tell it was him) to look up at my face.  
  
He did. He blinked slowly, clearing tears from his eyes as he raised his head. Upon seeing my eyes staring at him, he choked out my name, unable to believe that I was awake. I painfully squeezed his hand, then relaxed my grip, shutting my eyes again. It was bright in the room, and the fact that I was locked into staring at the ceiling hurt my eyes to look at him.  
  
The nurse was back in my room within minutes, and Jordan was awake now, attempting to not attack the woman and throw her out of the way to get to me.  
  
I was now the subject of a series of yes or no questions. I nodded simply at them, unable to speak due to the very uncomfortable tube down my throat. I felt a tickle in my lungs and I sporadically coughed. Big mistake. It felt as if someone were gagging me and cutting off my air supply. Panicking, I tried to throw my head to the side to dislodge the tube. Garret quickly grabbed my head and held it still, while the nurse paged the doctor on call. I felt my throat muscles contract again, and that brought on a coughing fit. It felt as if my chest was being set on fire. Tears stung my eyes as I struggled against Garret's grip. Locking eyes with him, I begged to be let go.  
  
He didn't. The doctor came walking into the room at an apparently fast rate. Upon seeing my cardiac monitor readings shooting through the roof, and my respirations becoming more frantic, I heard him telling the nurse to take over where Garret was standing. The man stared into my eyes in an attempt to calm me down.  
  
"Listen. I'm going to take the tube out. But you need to stay completely still. And you're still going to need an oxygen mask for a while because you're used to pure oxygen and this air will send your system into a shock. Stay still, don't fight it."  
  
I nodded as best I could, and then the doctor carefully prepared to remove the annoying tube. With a command to exhale, and a swift jerk, I was suddenly forced to breathe on my own. Which was an event which I was not prepared for. This was made apparent by my frantic gasping and the raspy sound of my voice which filled the room. I'm sure I was throwing Jordan into histerics with my actions, but hell, I was scared.  
  
An oxygen mask was strapped on me, and after a few chest-heaving moments, I had calmed down significantly. Now able to breathe, I felt alot better. After another round of blood tests and vitals checks, the doctor and nurse left the room. Jordan was the first at my side.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I just wanted to make sure he was still alive after that episode with the breathing tube. Gently touching his face, I smiled at him. "You alright?"  
  
He smiled back. "Never better." His voice cracked as he spoke, and be honest, he sounded like crap. He gasped after he spoke, taking in air from the plastic mask which was covering his mouth and nose.  
  
"Don't talk if it hurts you." I bit my lower lip. I didn't want him hurting himself just to talk to me.  
  
"I'm fine, Love. Just tired."  
  
"Then sleep. You should be unconcious after that fight you put up." I grabbed his hand and held it tightly. "You're still strong as ever."  
  
"Obviously not that intelligent because I'm lying in this bed." He dropped his gaze down to his stomach. "Those...should be some nice...scars."  
  
I noticed the laboring pauses in between words and frowned. It was obvious that he was having difficulty breathing still.  
  
"I'm fine Jordan." He squeezed my hand, obviously reading the worry on my face. Looking up at Garret, he smiled. "Hey."  
  
Garret nodded. "Hey. Good to see that you've joined us."  
  
"I wanted to come back to the light sometime...it just took you to do it for me."  
  
Laughing, Garret smiled. "I'm glad to know that I could be of help."  
  
We sat and laughed, all three of us. Even with severe chest trauma, Nigel found the ability to laugh somewhere inside of him. I'm sure it wasn't without pain, but he needed it.  
  
He'd been awake for nearly an hour when Renee walked in the door, a nervous smile on her face. Garret quickly relinquished his seat to her, but she bypassed him to give Nigel a kiss on the forehead and one of her traditonal quirky smiles.  
  
"So how is our vigilante?"  
  
~~Garret~~ I shook my head. So much for her not being blunt. I had half a mind to nudge her to try to make her shut up, but I realized it would probably just get me in some form of trouble. So I decided to do the next best thing and try to talk her off of the subject.  
  
"He woke up about an hour ago, and we had a lovely incident with his breathing tube, right Nige?" I shot a glance at Renee to attempt to get my point across.  
  
"Good. So your head's clear. Do you know who did this to you?"  
  
Missed. I shook my head, rolling my eyes at Jordan. She smiled back, then mouthed the words 'she's your lover' at me with a disappointed smirk on her face.  
  
I saw Nigel's face go blank. He was obviously unwilling to talk about what had happened to him. It was all too soon, he was too freaked out about it. Any doctor would have been able to see that.  
  
But again, we witness that Renee is not a doctor but an attorney.  
  
"Was it Cahill or any of his creeps?"  
  
I glanced down at him again, and I could see this look of fear in his eyes. He had no wish to revisit what had happened to him, especially not while lying strapped to a hospital bed. He'd just woken up, and he was now the first witness on the stand in the court of Renee. He shut his eyes and sighed. Jordan noticed that his hand was shaking in hers while she was holding it.  
  
Jordan stared at his face, attempting to read what he was thinking. I'm pretty sure it was along the lines of 'make her stop please...'  
  
I gently took Renee by the arm and softly requested that she come and talk to me out in the hallway. I smiled at the nurse who was walking in, carrying a syringe of medication for him. I walked down the hall, out of the earshot of Jordan and Nigel, and then I shook my head.  
  
"What? What are you doing dragging me out into the hallway for?"  
  
"Can't you see it?" I was a little annoyed at her at the moment. Nigel was one of my people, not one of her witnesses. Not yet at least.  
  
"See what? The fact that he got the crap kicked out of him?"  
  
"No...the fact that he's scared out of his mind! He doesn't want to talk about what happened yet. It's one of the symptoms of PTSD."  
  
"PTSD?" She glared at me.  
  
"Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. In other words, after a trauma, people often go through several stages before they can talk about what happened to them."  
  
"Well, they're in jail on a unrelated charges, for firing at the people in the streets, but since they didn't hurt anyone, they're going to get out and disappear into the woodwork. He needs to talk."  
  
"Renee. He doesn't know how bad he's hurt."  
  
"So? He can still talk and ID the men."  
  
I was about to throw something back at her when the sound of several alarms came shrieking from the doorway to his room. The blue light above his doorway began flashing, and I heard Jordan frantically yelling for help. I ran back into the room, completely ignoring Renee.  
  
The nurse was clearing Jordan away from Nigel's bedside, and I could see him shaking. Even from the doorway, the fact that he was having a seizure was obvious. Jordan had this look in her eyes that was a mixture of fear and pain. I was quickly at her side as the doctors rushed in and surrounded his bed. Renee soon joined us, and I nudged them towards each other as I moved towards Nigel's bedside.  
  
A Grand-Mal seizure. The worst. A team of doctors and nurses were holding him still, as he'd broken several of the velcro bonds that had been stabilizing his back. Someone started pumping air into his lungs, but I was shoved out of the way as I heard the sound that no one in a hospital wants to hear. The toneless beep and alarm of a lost heartrate. I was ignored as the team of doctors pulled a crashcart up to the bedside, and I felt the blood drain out of my body as I heard the electric charge of the defilabrator paddles being warmed up. They pulled bandages off his chest frantically, then they cleared his body. With a jolt of electricity, his body jumped on the table. But still no heartrate. The head doctor yelled out several commands, and they started a round of CPR.  
  
I turned to see Jordan crumpled on the floor, with Renee kneeling at her side. The frantic noise all faded as I walked to her side, and I collapsed to my knees and took her in a hug. The sound of another electrical charge shocked me back into thinking, and I listened for the sound of a heartbeat. None.  
  
Nigel was crashing fast. And all we could do was pray.  
  
******  
  
TBC...  
  
****** 


	27. Chapter 27

A/N: Thanks everybody for reading 26, here's the long (a few days so what) awaited 27!  
  
Takes place at the hospital, right after 26...so if you haven't read that one I suggest you do so now...Let us continue on!  
  
********** Chapter 27 **********  
  
~~Jordan~~ As soon as those alarms started shrieking I was pretty much wide awake. After shouting for help I soon realized that there in fact WAS a nurse standing in the room with me. But, as my luck would have it, I was promptly shoved on the other side of the curtain as a mass of doctors swarmed his bed. I slowly walked backwards and sank to the floor in a heap, my mind racing. I had just been talking to him not a minute before, and now he was having a seizure...  
  
"Jordan, sweetie, what the hell happened?!" Garret was quickly at my side, with Renee in tow. "Talk to me Jordan."  
  
I bit my lip while attempting to slow my brain down. It wasn't working. The words I spoke came out at about a mile a minute. "He was fine--I was talking to him and he was fine--then the nurse gave him a shot and he was okay for a few seconds then he started twitching and then he..." My voice trailed off as the toneless cardiac monitor continued to sound.  
  
"Do you know what she gave him?" Garret tried to shake me back into concentration.  
  
I could tell he was running Nigel's personnel file over in his head. Obviously looking for allergies he'd listed.  
  
"He's not allergic to anything." I shook my head. "The nurse asked him before she gave him the injection." I'd never knew Nigel to be allergic to any medication, but then again, I didn't really know his medical history that well.  
  
"I'm sorry folks, but I'm going to need you to leave the room." We were interrupted in our thinking by a very annoyed looking doctor who was a bit frazzled at the moment. "Please go out to the waiting area."  
  
"What's going on?" Renee quickly assumed her role of the "evil D.A." and demanded information.  
  
Ironically, as she spoke, we heard the steady beep of the cardiac monitor change to random blips. Whirling around, I stared at the activity at his bedside and noticed a definite change. A good change.  
  
"Well, we obviously just got him back, but he's going to need to be re- stabilized and we'll have to run some more tests to figure out what went wrong."  
  
"Check for an allergic reaction to whatever drug they gave him." I glared at the doctor, fully prepared to give attitude back to him if he was giving it to us.  
  
Nodding, the man motioned towards the doorway and then turned to go back to the bedside.  
  
~~Garret~~ Helping Jordan up off the floor, I internally breathed a huge sigh of relief. I heard a cardiac monitor registering a heartbeat, and I knew he was breathing. Smiling weakly at Renee, then at Jordan, I led the way out of Nigel's room, down the hall, and out into the waiting area.  
  
Making myself comfortable on an empty couch, I motioned for someone to sit next to me. I got both of them. Jordan on my left, Renee on my right. Jordan pulled her legs up onto the couch, snuggled against me and turned me into the aptly named "Garret pillow" in a matter of minutes, while Renee took the slow approach and just rested her forehead on my shoulder. I was very glad at the moment that no one else from the Morgue was here to see "me and my girls" snuggled up on the couch.  
  
"You think he's alright?" Renee was muttering with her head still buried in my shoulder. "I mean, he's alive but do you think he'll walk?"  
  
I sighed. "Out of here? Maybe. I'm really hoping he does though. I sure hope the damage to his spine isn't permanent, for his sake."  
  
"Yeah...he won't be able to walk Rudy for a while..." Jordan smiled up at me. "Speaking of Rudy, one of us should probably go check up on him. Poor guy's probably starving."  
  
"Yeah. Call...Bug, he's at the morgue...Nigel may have left a spare key in a coat pocket or something. Have him go check on him...and the cat. He has a cat right?"  
  
She nodded. "Yeah, Rodger, the party cat."  
  
"Whatever. Get his mail too, if you can." I smiled at Jordan as she stood to go call Bug. "Let them know what happened, but spare details. Tell them he's alright now."  
  
She nodded as she walked away, pulling out her cell phone as she headed outside.  
  
"How do you do it?"  
  
I turned back to see Renee looking towards the swinging double doors.  
  
"What?"  
  
She looked back at me. "How can you keep yourself composed so well when one of your own is in there fighting for his life? I know that if it was you in there I'd be..." She stopped short.  
  
I lifted her face with my hand. "You'd be what?"  
  
"Scared as all hell that I might lose you."  
  
I was shocked. I'd never heard her say anything like that before. I mean...it was great to hear her say it, but it was just so out of character for her to admit it.  
  
"I mean...you and me are so close that if I were to watch you go through that I'd probably have a mental breakdown. You've never stopped being nice to me, since I walked my way into town and made my presence well known. And that night in Raleigh, you let me know that I had at least one person who cared in Boston. I don't know what I would do if you were to get hurt."  
  
I sat back, absorbing what she had just said. After about five minutes of silence, I was about to speak, but she interrupted me again.  
  
"Dammit Garret. I think I'm in love with you." Dropping her gaze to the floor, she continued, her voice low. "There. I said it."  
  
Had we not been in the middle of a hospital waiting room, I would have kissed her right then and there. I stared at a spot on the wall until I couldn't take it any longer. "I know exactly what you mean Renee. You just said it first." I spoke. "There's something about you that just makes me feel like I've got something special..."  
  
So much for not kissing in the hospital waiting room. She leaned over and planted a gentle kiss on my cheek, smiling softly. "There. No one noticed."  
  
"Except me. I thought you two knew better than to get it on in public places." Jordan announced her return with a typical remark. "Although, if you consider my doorway private, I'd hate to see what you considered the bedroom."  
  
I laughed. "Didn't Max ever tell you to stay out of other people's love lives?"  
  
She was about to fling another remark at me when a doctor walked into the room. You could tell when it was a doctor because everyone in the room shut up, hoping that they would get some news on their loved ones. The man crossed the floor to the couch and sat across from us. "I've got some good news about Nigel."  
  
Jordan immediately smiled, then looked at me. I smiled back.  
  
"He's awake, and he's talking. He's asking to see all of you, and we need you to go in right away because he's refusing to take his pain medication until he speaks with you."  
  
"Why doesn't he want painkillers?!" Jordan stood up, ready to run in and turn into a nurse of sorts.  
  
"They'll make him fall asleep. He needs to talk to you."  
  
"Then we'll go." I stood, helped Renee up, then started walking towards where I knew Nigel's room to be.  
  
"He did have an allergic reaction to medication, if you're still wondering." The doctor touched Jordan on the shoulder. "Lidocaine. Nurse shot some into him and it didn't take too well."  
  
"Oh okay. That's what I figured." She was the first to enter his room, and she was quickly by his side.  
  
~~Jordan~~  
  
"Hey Nige...how you feeling?" I leaned over and gently kissed him on the top of his head.  
  
"The fact that I almost died has nothing to do with this, but frankly I'm a little tired, Love." He smiled up at me weakly from behind the oxygen mask.  
  
"You didn't almost die...you just...had an allergic reaction."  
  
"I know. I was thrashing around and seizing and all that good stuff." His face fell when as he finished the sentence.  
  
"Nigel? You alright? You need to take your medication you know..."  
  
"I--I'm fine Jordan. I just realized something though, and I have a question for you."  
  
"What?" I looked down at his face, and his eyes were fixated at the end of his bed.  
  
"Why can't I move my legs?"  
  
****** TBC... ****** 


	28. Chapter 28

A/N: Sorry this update took so long! I've been really busy lately and I've been kinda stuck. But now we're ready to roll! Here we go!  
  
A/N: This chapter follows straight outta chapter 27...  
  
**********  
  
Chapter 28  
  
**********  
  
~~Nigel~~ "Why can't I feel my legs?" I stared at the two bumps my toes made in the sheet, my brain attempting to figure out what the hell was going on. "One of you...tell me what the hell is going on. Now."  
  
"Nigel...are you certain you can't feel your legs?" Garret looked down at my feet. "They're not just strapped down?"  
  
"No. I can't wiggle my toes either..." Fear shook my voice as I attempted to move my toes but had no feeling. "I can't move...what's wrong with me Garret?"  
  
"We were afraid of this." He sat in a chair and dragged it over to my bed. "The doctors had a feeling that this might happen."  
  
"Why? Because of my seizure?" I hadn't thrashed around that much, and even with that the medical team was piled on me so tight that I could barely move as it was. I couldn't have broken anything doing that.  
  
The realization dawned on me. It was from the bullets. I'd been hit somewhere, somewhere bad. But I had been shot in the stomach...a bullet would have had to pass through a lot more that skin to get to my spinal cord. I looked down at my feet and then back up to Garret. He was nodding, he knew I'd figured it out. "The bullet?"  
  
"Yeah. One of them hit your back and chipped a chunk of of one of the bones...the doctors think still that the paralysis is temporary due to the swelling you've got...at least they're hoping it is." He smiled at me. "It's most likely temporary..."  
  
"What if it's not? What am I going to do if I can't walk? I sure as hell won't be able to work!" I glared down at my feet. "What did I do to deserve this?! All I do is go try to give a poor dead kid justice and I end up lying on my back in this goddamn hospital bed! Where's the bloody irony in that huh?! Justice sure was served...he bastard probably slipped away back into the cracks like the dirty rat that he is...and to what thanks do I get?! NONE! And I WON'T get any because the Boston P.D. will get their asses down on me for inciting the whole damn mess and lock me up!! I'll be crippled AND stuck in prison!" I stopped my bitching long enough to catch a few quick breaths. Had I been able to get up and throw something, I probably would have taken out a window or two. Jordan, Renee, Garret, and the nurse all were staring at me, slack-jawed at the outburst I'd just flung at them. I stared at them and then felt an immense amount of fear and sadness build up inside of me.  
  
"I'm sorry guys...I'm just scared." I felt myself start to shake as I let my head fall back and hit the pillow behind me. I didn't even notice that I was starting to cry until I felt Jordan's hand on my cheek.  
  
"Nige...it's alright...you're allowed to be scared.  
  
I shook my head. "But, I-" I was cut off by Jordan's finger pressed to my lips.  
  
"It's fine. Just relax..."  
  
I swallowed deeply and shut my eyes, and attempted to stop the occasional tear from falling. I opened one eye however, at the tingling sensation I felt in my left arm.  
  
Staring up at a nurse who was pushing a syringe of what I believed to be some sort of painkiller, I smiled weakly. Sure, I didn't want to goto sleep...but the warm fuzzy feeling that came along with a hit sure made me shut up and not care about anything else. I closed the eye again and slowly drifted into sleep, happily oblivious to the rest of my surroundings.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I glanced over at Garret, who I could tell was extremely glad to see Nigel asleep and unable to throw another fit. I then looked at the nurse, quite curious as to what she'd used to put our raving British friend to sleep. She almost read my mind, and she smiled at me.  
  
"Morphine. Works every time."  
  
Making a mental note to stock up on some for my next run in with a bad boyfriend, I looked up at Renee who had now began heading for the door. "Where are you going?"  
  
"I'm heading to my apartment to sleep...as it IS quite early in the morning and I have a job that I need to do in about six hours."  
  
I looked down at my watch. So she was right. It didn't even seem like it was so early, but it was. "Ok." I then noticed that Garret was getting up to follow her. "Where are YOU going mister?"  
  
"It's my weekend to have Abby, and I'm sure she's quite confused about where I am, if she's even still at the house. She probably called Maggie and told her that I wasn't there. My phone's been dead for a while now, so I wouldn't know." He paused. "I promise I'll stop by in the morning before work. You can go home too...he'll be out for a while with that dose of drugs he just got."  
  
I shook my head. "No, I'm going to stay here for at least a little while. I don't want him to wake up alone..."  
  
"Take tomorrow off. We can manage without you." He smiled at me as he walked out the door. "Call me if anything happens."  
  
"I will Garret."  
  
They both walked out, leaving me to sit and watch over Nigel. I concentrated on the shallow rise and fall of his chest, and starting thinking about what really could happen if he didn't walk again.  
  
~~Garret~~ I walked silently down the hallway next to Renee, unsure of what to say to her. At the current moment, I didn't want to go home to an empty house, and I was pretty sure she didn't want to either. As we crossed through the emergency room while heading for the exit and the parking lot, she finally said something.  
  
"What's the chance of Abby being at your house?"  
  
"Slim to none." I looked over at her.  
  
"Well...if she's not there, do you think I could come over and stay with you tonight? I'm not in the mood to be alone."  
  
"Absolutely. I'm not in the mood either."  
  
Smiling, I walked her across the neon lit parking lot to her car. When we got to it, she opened the door and climbed in. Before shutting the door however, she looked at me. "Thank you Garret."  
  
"No problem. Just wait and follow me out, alright?"  
  
"Sounds good to me." She shut the door, and I turned and began a slight jog to my car. I climbed in, plugged my phone into the charger, and started the car. I drove to where Renee was parked, and waited for her to back out to follow me.  
  
The drive to the house was silent. I contemplated turning on the radio but my mind was stuck back at the hospital, staring at Nigel lying asleep on the bed. I slowly pulled into my driveway, not bothering to go into the garage. Sliding my key into the lock, I heard Renee get out of the car and wait a few steps behind me.  
  
Opening the door, I walked in and turned on a few lights. I noticed a white sheet of paper lying on the floor in front of me, so I picked it up and read it.  
  
Dad,  
  
I guess you forgot it was your weekend. I tried calling you but your phone was dead, so I called mom and she came and picked me up. Don't worry, I'll try to come by and visit next weekend.  
  
Love, Abby  
  
I let the piece of paper fall onto the floor and motioned for Renee to come in. "She's not here, her mom came and picked her up." I threw my keys on a side table, my jacket onto the couch, and I turned to face Renee. "You can take my bed...I'll take the couch."  
  
"Actually, I was hoping that you could...stay with me." She walked forwards and wrapped her arms around my waist. "I don't want to be alone."  
  
I pulled her into my arms softly. "Neither do I." I started walking towards my room while keeping one arm around her waist. She was snuggling into my shoulder while walking with me, and I smiled at her.  
  
She walked towards my bathroom and sighed. "Do you have any baggy clothes I could borrow to sleep in?"  
  
I nodded, walking over to my dresser and opening the bottom drawer. Selecting an tee-shirt that would fit, I shut the drawer and then walked over to her. "Here."  
  
"I'll get changed in here. You can change while I'm changing."  
  
"Alright."  
  
She shut the bathroom door behind her, and I crossed my floor to my closet. Pulling out a pair of loose scrub pants and a plain white tee-shirt, I quickly changed out of my work clothes and climbed into bed, turning off the light as I did so.  
  
She emerged a few minutes later, flicking off the bathroom light and crawling into bed beside me. "You asleep yet?"  
  
"No." I rolled over and faced her. "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Because I didn't want to wake you up just so I could kiss you." She leaned in and planted a gentle kiss on my lips.  
  
I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer to me, gently kissing her back. She nuzzled her head onto my chest, and I gently ran my fingers through her hair.  
  
"Goodnight Garret."  
  
"Goodnight Renee." I closed my eyes and smiled to myself as I felt her breathe a deep sigh. This was exactly what I needed...someone to be there next to me when I needed them the most. I quickly fell asleep, which was expected being that I'd been up for a very long time.  
  
TBC...  
  
***Thanks for reading, I promise next chapter will be longer, and remember, reviews are always enjoyed!*** 


	29. Chapter 29

A/N: This chapter takes place 4 days after chapter 27. It starts out in the hospital, in Nigel's room. Jordan's been back to work occasionally, and now she, Garret, or Renee try to visit him at least once a day...  
  
********** CHAPTER 29 **********  
  
~~Nigel~~ I have to admit, staring at the ceiling for a week can get on your nerves. I'd memorized every line in the paint, and I could match the shade of white to one of those paint sampler things you get from the hardware store if you wanted me to. Sure, the boredom was interrupted by hourly visits from an attending nurse...and lunchtime was a moment to be remembered, disgusting green jello and all.  
  
As I glanced around at the few small flower arrangements and the balloons that had been left for me over the past few days, I noticed a small stuffed bulldog lying on the table top that hadn't been there before. I slowly reached for it, and I had almost grabbed it when I heard the overly cheery voice of Jordan in the doorway.  
  
She was clinging onto a brown paper sack and grinning eagerly as she bounded over to my bedside and sat in the nearest chair.  
  
"Guess what I brought you." She waved the bag in the air next to the bed.  
  
"If you mention anything that has to do with jello, I'll kill you." I could barely even look at the pastey green goo in it's little plastic cup, let alone keep any of it down.  
  
Jordan smiled again, and produced a thermos and a mug from the bag. "I figured you were missing drinking the good stuff...so I made you some at work and brought it here."  
  
"What is it?" I raised my head slightly to look at her.  
  
"Tea." She then looked at me, lying flat on my back. "You're not going to be able to drink this lying down like that."  
  
I laughed. "Where'd you get tea from?"  
  
"Your bottom left hand drawer of your desk. Bug let me in on where you keep your stash." She paused for a minute. "Are you able to sit up to do anything?"  
  
"I can sit up with a nurses help...I normally do when I eat."  
  
Jordan pushed the call button that I had on my bed and smiled. "Then we'll just have to get someone in here to help you out, now won't we."  
  
I nodded, then inhaled the fragrant smell of the tea as I laid my head back on the pillow. Luckily, we didn't have to wait very long for a nurse to enter the room and inquire about why we'd paged for one.  
  
"I was wondering if you could help sit him up, because I brought him some tea...and he can't drink lying down." Jordan smiled sweetly at the nurse.  
  
"Sure thing honey, let me just get him all situated." The nurse moved to my side and made sure I was lying straight, and that my brace was on correctly. After making sure of all that, she lifted the back end of my bed and made it so I was sitting up at a better angle for eating and drinking. "That alright?"  
  
"Yeah, that's perfect." I nodded, happy to have the rest of the room to stare at instead of the ceiling.  
  
The nurse walked out, and Jordan rolled my little tray table over my lap and set the mug of tea down on it. "There. NOW you can have some."  
  
Eagerly taking the mug in both hands, I sipped it slowly, extremely happy to be tasting something other than weak hospital decaf or cranberry juice. After I set the mug back down, I sighed. "Thanks Jordan."  
  
She leaned over and gave me a soft hug with one arm. "You're welcome Nige." She sat back down, then gently ran her fingers over the multitude of stitches in my shoulder. "These are looking pretty red...you've gotta make sure they don't get infected."  
  
The feeling of her cold fingertips on the hot skin around the cuts made me shiver slightly, and I quickly took another drink of the tea to stop it. "The docs wash them out everyday...they're fine." I glanced around the room and sighed. "Have they told YOU anything about me yet?"  
  
She shook her head. "They haven't said anything to anybody. Not me, not Garret, not even Renee...and she's been almost ready to slap lawsuits on them for not informing us of your condition. They keep saying something about giving information to the relatives only."  
  
I nodded. "Which would mean my father, which doesn't matter anyways. He doesn't care what happens to me."  
  
Jordan nodded in agreement. "You're right." She was about to say something else when the doctor who had been in charge of my case walked in the room.  
  
"Good afternoon Nigel, Jordan." He smiled down at the both of us. "How are you feeling today? You have any movement in your legs or toes today?"  
  
I shook my head. "Not yet, but they're not as numb feeling as they were yesterday."  
  
He smiled. "That's normally a good sign. The brace is helping."  
  
"Do you have any other information about me?" I looked up at him eagerly. "Like, when can I get out of here?"  
  
"You're not going to be able to leave for a while, I'm afraid...and I know how boring it is for you to sit in here all by yourself." The doctor looked towards the doorway. "If it's alright with you, I was wondering if we could put someone in the bed on the other side of the room from you."  
  
"Who is it?" Jordan looked towards the doorway as well.  
  
"I believe he's a...17 year old male who was involved in an automobile accident."  
  
"Why isn't he in a pediatrics unit?" I looked over at Jordan. Children 18 and under were normally put into the pediatrics unit so they could be with children their own age and not feel so out of place.  
  
"He lost his left leg slightly above the knee, and he has a hairline pelvis fracture that's made it so he needs to be confined to his bed." The doctor shook his head. "It's tragic, really...according to witness reports, he hit a speedbump at a bad angle going way too fast, and he ended up wrapping his car around a telephone pole. Killed the passenger instantly."  
  
Jordan shook her head. "Who was in the car with him?"  
  
"His girlfriend of three years. At least that's what his parents told me." He paused for a moment. "But, the reason I want to bring him in here is because he needs to be somewhere quiet, and right now you're about the quietest patient we've got. Everybody else in osteology is moaning and complaining about the pain that they're in, but you're a trooper."  
  
"Sounds like I'm the odd one out, huh?" I smiled up at him.  
  
"So, you alright with bringing him in here?"  
  
"Yeah. That's fine. You need me to do anything?"  
  
"Probably just stay like you are for a while, at least until visiting hours are over. His parents are here, and I'm sorry to say that they're not accepting his injuries too well...we're going to try and shoo them out right when time is up, for your sake."  
  
I shook my head. "Let them stay. It'll give me something to watch."  
  
The doctor smiled, then turned and walked towards the entrance to the room. "I'll go bring him down."  
  
Jordan smiled at him as he left, then she turned back to me. "So...this mean that I'm not entertaining enough for you?"  
  
"No, Love, it means that you need to give me more tea." I pushed the mug towards her, and she obliged by filling it up. As she was doing so, I heard the muffled sounds of her pager coming from her purse. "You might want to look at that."  
  
"Yeah, I know." She set the tea back in front of me, then sighed as she dug her pager out of her purse. "Great. Just what I need to come back to work for."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Multiple gunshot victims from a drive-by. The shooter had good aim, unfortunately. I've gotta get back...Garret's calling everybody in." Jordan leaned over and gave me another hug. "I'll stop by tomorrow, alright?"  
  
"Okay. Thanks for the tea, Jordan."  
  
"Bye Nige." She walked out of the room and left me by myself, and I waited for the doctor to bring the kid down.  
  
I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I heard was slightly raised voices arguing about something. Groggily opening an eye and looking across the room, I noticed that there was a group of people huddled around the bed, and two of them were arguing which each other. I sat silent and watched as they became more and more angry, and I began to feel sorry for the boy, who was lying there watching them fight.  
  
I debated on whether or not to say something, and I was about to ask them to quiet down, but the nurse that walked in did it for me.  
  
After reprimanding the parents for being so loud, she promptly kicked everyone out of the room, claiming that visiting hours were over and it was time for both of us to get some rest. I was thankful for their lack of protest, and after some teary goodbyes, they finally left the room, leaving it in silence.  
  
I looked over at the boy who was staring up at the ceiling blankly. I almost laughed, for I could see myself doing the same thing on a daily basis. Deciding to start some conversation, I spoke towards his side of the room.  
  
"Careful, you might memorize the patterns too fast and be bored for the next week."  
  
He looked over at me. "What did you say?"  
  
"I said, you might memorize the patterns in the ceiling to fast and you'll be bored out of your mind for the next week." I laughed. "I've done it myself."  
  
"How long have you been in here?"  
  
"About a week. Although, I wasn't fully awake for about half of it." I looked over at the doorway.  
  
"Why are you here?" He followed my gaze to the doorway, where I was flagging down a passing nurse.  
  
"Can I help you sir?" The R.N. moved to my bedside after smiling at the boy.  
  
"Can you move me over next to him so we can talk without shouting across the room?" I pointed at the boy. "Please?"  
  
"Of course." She gently wheeled my bed over next to the boy's, then asked if I needed anything else. Upon my head shake, she exited the room.  
  
"Much better. So you asked why I was here?" I looked over at the boy again.  
  
"Yeah. What happened to you?" I could tell he was looking at his own leg and then at me.  
  
"I got shot and a bullet hit my spine. I can't move anything from the waist down. You?" I acted as if I didn't notice that the sheet above his missing leg rested on the bed and not where a leg should be. I wanted him to think that I didn't even notice what was wrong with him.  
  
"I was in a car accident...I lost my leg and broke my hip...at least that's what the doctor's said happened."  
  
"Oh. I didn't even notice your leg." I smiled at him. "By the way, my name's Nigel." I held a hand out towards him, IV's trailing out of my arm.  
  
"I'm Ryan." He shook my hand weakly, as I could tell he was in some pain in doing so. "So you can't walk? Does it hurt?"  
  
"Well, I can't feel much...and it doesn't hurt because the hospital's got me on such a painkiller schedule to keep the swelling in my spinal cord down. How about yours?"  
  
"I...can't feel anything in that leg...it's pretty weird. It's so different not even having anything there...it's really freaky. And my hips are pretty sore, probably because they're broken. Why'd you get shot?" He smiled weakly at me, and I could tell he was tired but he didn't want to stop talking.  
  
"I was trying to bust some guys that killed this kid a long time ago...you see, I work for the coroner's office, and I got a case of a dead little kid that was found in an alley, and I finally figured out who killed him. Then I went to catch him, and the guy shot me."  
  
"Did you pass out?"  
  
"Yeah...I had a pretty bad seizure too. I had a reaction to one of the medications that they gave me."  
  
I saw his face fall, and then I saw his eye's well up with tears. "You said you work for the coroner?"  
  
I nodded, knowing exactly what he was getting at.  
  
"Would you be able to tell me how somebody died?"  
  
I nodded again. "If the autopsy has been completed already." Looking into his eyes, I swallowed hard. "What's her name?"  
  
Fighting back tears, he attempted not to break into sobs as he spoke. "Heather. Heather Rice."  
  
"Can you hand me that phone?" I motioned for the phone on the other side of the bed. Sure, I probably shouldn't be doing this for the kid, but I knew he wasn't going to be able to sleep if he didn't know. I took the phone from him and nodded. "Now get me an outside line."  
  
He pressed the buttons needed, and then I told him the phone number to the Morgue's front desk. Upon hearing Emmy's voice on the line, I asked if I could talk to Jordan.  
  
Luckily, she'd just gotten out of autopsy, so I could.  
  
"Hey Jordan"  
  
"Hi Nige! What's up?"  
  
I glanced over Ryan, who was pleading with me with his eyes. I nodded.  
  
"I was wondering if you guys had gotten the body of a..." I paused, then mouthed him to tell me her age. "...Of a seventeen year old female that was killed in a car crash."  
  
"Hold on, let me check." I heard her rummage through several papers, and then she came back on the line. "Yeah, we did. Already been processed."  
  
"Alright. Can you tell me what the cause of death was?" I noticed that Ryan was holding back tears as I spoke, so I turned my gaze up to the ceiling.  
  
"Why do you want to know...and how did you even know about the body Nigel?"  
  
I shook my head to myself. "Think Jordan."  
  
A brief pause, and then I heard her sigh in realization. "I technically shouldn't release that to you."  
  
"Since when has that stopped you before, Jordan, seriously."  
  
"Alright alright. She died of...cerebral and internal hemorrhage due to massive head and chest trauma. Several ribs punctured her lungs, stomach, and heart...x-rays show massive amounts of blood loss through all internal organs. It wasn't pretty, Nigel. She drowned on her own blood."  
  
I had to fight the gag reflex that I felt coming on, and I breathed in deeply to stop myself from freaking out. "So...instantly right?"  
  
"No...she had massive respiratory failure and had to choke to death..."  
  
I cut her off before she could go any farther. "Thanks Jordan. Instantly, that's what I thought." I then hung up the phone and passed it back to Ryan, who hung it up.  
  
"So?" He looked over at me.  
  
"One of her ribs pierced her heart. She died instantly." I placed a hand on his arm and sighed. "She didn't even know what happened."  
  
He nodded, then yawned one of the hugest yawns I'd seen in a while. "I guess...that's good..."  
  
I smiled. "Get some sleep man. You're gonna need it to be able to memorize the ceiling tomorrow."  
  
I didn't know if he heard me or not, because he was already asleep by the time I had paged for a nurse to come move my bed back across the room and get him a blanket. After she had dimmed the lights, I checked the clock on the wall.  
  
4 A.M.  
  
4 hours until my morning round of jello. Wonderful.  
  
TBC....  
  
**thanks for reading! and remember, reviews and comments are always appreciated. the big chapter 30 is coming up too, so lots of feedback means a LONG chapter!** 


	30. Chapter 30

A/N: Well, the big 3-0! Yay! Thanks everybody who's reviewed so far, I've enjoyed knowing you all like my story, and here's chapter 30! Same place, same time, after chapter 29, so lets go!  
  
********** CHAPTER 30 **********  
  
~~Jordan~~ "Wow...it's dead around here." I mumbled to myself as I wandered the hallways of the morgue. Bug was off taking an early lunch, Peter had the day off...and Lily was in conference with the family of one of the people killed in the drive by we had yesterday. Glancing at Garret's darkened office, I noticed that it was ten-thirty. Funny..." I thought to myself. "...he didn't say he wasn't coming in...and I've already gotten a call from Renee today so he's not with her. Shrugging to myself, I heard the door to the conference room open and I saw Lily escorting the family out into the lobby, probably to make arrangements for pickup of their son's body. As I headed for the lab to see if Garret was running tests or something, I jumped when I heard his voice booming from inside exam one.  
  
"Now SIT STILL!"  
  
I whirled around and nearly stopped in my tracks. Something was ALIVE in exam one with Garret?! I had to see this. Quickly heading in that direction, I opened the doors to the autopsy suite to see one of the most amusing sights I'd seen in a long time.  
  
Garret was covered, from head to toe, in bubbles.  
  
I then discovered the thing that Garret had been trying to make sit still. The loud, deep throated grunting of an English bulldog greeted my ears as I saw the floppy head poke up over the side of the sink.  
  
"Is that...Rudy?" Moving over to Garret's side, I peered into the sink at the very wet and playful dog rolling in the bubbles.  
  
"Yes, it's Rudy, and he does NOT want to take a bath, now do we?" He reached down and scratched the dog behind the back legs. "Yes...we want to get Garret all covered in bubbles...that's fun..."  
  
Garret was baby talking a dog. I grinned and nudged Garret playfully. "Found a new sport, trying to wash a bulldog?"  
  
"Nope, I'm getting him ready so you can help me clip his hair." He wiped the suds off his face with the back of his sleeve. "Which you're going to do in about ten minutes, so you should go get changed into some scrubs. And bring me some towels when you come back."  
  
"Why do I have to clip his hair again? Last time I checked, I was a doctor, not a groomer."  
  
"We're taking him to visit Nigel, and I had to swear my life to the hospital saying that I'd have him clean and freshly trimmed." Garret grabbed the spray-head that attached to the faucet and began squirting the soap off of Rudy. "The clean parts done, and since I would hope you're better with hair than I am, you're leading the clipping."  
  
"Damn straight I'm better with hair than you are." I reached up and rubbed the top of Garret's head. "I still think you should let it grow and spike it."  
  
Shaking his head, he grinned at me. "Just go get some towels, and get changed."  
  
I walked out of the room, and headed for the lockers. After getting into my familiar pair of those oh so comfortable and attractive scrubs, and throwing my hair back in a messy bun, I grabbed a armful of towels out of the clean laundry cart and headed back to the exam room.  
  
"Took you long enough."  
  
I looked up to see Garret smiling at me, with a hyperactive and slippery bulldog skidding across the laminate floor, running into everything thought humanly possible.  
  
"Well, you don't have to let him destroy the place, now do we?" I threw a towel over Garret's head, then knelt on the floor and wrapped Rudy in the one I had in my hand. More excited grunting and snorting ensued, and I soon found myself pinned flat on my back, being used as a personal drying mat for the wiggling mass of fat that was considered an animal.  
  
I squeaked out a feeble cry for help, and only then did I see Garret in the corner, going into hysterics at the sight of me trapped on the floor. "Hey! Stop laughing and help me!"  
  
Shaking his head and wiping his eyes with the towel, Garret slowly walked over and knelt on the floor next to me. "I can't help it, you look so..."  
  
"I look so WHAT?!?" I squealed out a sentence before Rudy proceeded to attack my face with a multitude of bulldog kisses, the big, wet, sloppy kind. "Get it off!!!"  
  
Garret pulled Rudy off of me and grinned. "You were laughing so hard, somebody walking by would have thought we enjoyed cutting open dead people."  
  
"What are you talking about? I do enjoy my job. I get to work with fun people." I pulled myself into a sitting position and shook my head. "HOW are we going to trim his hair? He's so hyper he won't sit still and by the time we're done he'll look like he has a bad case of mange."  
  
"We have a leash, and you're using clippers that have a guard on them...just go over all of his skin unless he wants a mohawk..." Garret smiled. "So, how about we set this guy up on the table and start cutting?"  
  
"You make it sound like we're doing an autopsy on Nigel's dog. I don't think he'd enjoy that."  
  
"But I'm sure he'd enjoy seeing him. And that kid might like it too." He picked the dog up and placed him on the table. "The clippers are over there on the counter." Garret clipped his leash onto the edge of the table. "This should hold him, at least a little bit."  
  
"Yeah." I grabbed the clippers, and after plugging them in and making sure the blades were attached properly, I placed the right size guard on them and fired them up. "Where'd you get these, anyways?"  
  
"Renee. She used to have a dog, so she let me borrow them."  
  
"She used to have a dog? What kind?"  
  
"No clue. All I know is the thing was hairy. Probably why she kept her own clippers around, so she could trim it herself."  
  
I started trimming Rudy's hair, and I was thankful that I didn't have to deal with a wiggling mass on THIS time around. The clippers actually appeared to be calming him down, and I managed to get him all trimmed in a short period of time.  
  
After inspecting all the parts of him, Garret smiled. "Good job. Maybe you have a different calling than forensics...grooming."  
  
"I think...no." I set the clippers down and rubbed all the loose hair off with a towel. "All done." Setting Rudy down on the floor, Garret clipped the leash onto his collar and took him from me.  
  
"I've got a bandana to tie around his neck in my office, and then we can go change and then visit Nigel." Looking down at his clothes, Garret sighed. "Who ever thought bubbles could be so deadly?"  
  
"Awww...you're just damp you big baby. Tough it up." I socked Garret on the shoulder and darted out of the room, intent on changing back into dry and regular clothing.  
  
After changing, and after Garret had changed as well, we quickly tied a bandana emblazoned with the Union Jack around Rudy's neck and headed out. We decided to take Garret's car, so that I could be the dog-sitter on the ride to the hospital, and we were soon on our way.  
  
~~Nigel~~ I wearily opened my eyes and groaned, feeling an immense amount of pain in my right arm as I did so. Looking down, I saw that my IV line had been removed, and even under the bandage I could see a huge bruise forming. I laid my head back on the pillow and groaned. This was NOT what I needed right now.  
  
"They took your IV out last night."  
  
I opened one eye and looked across the room at Ryan, who was sitting up in his bed, reading a comic book. "Why?"  
  
"You rolled over on it in your sleep and it started to bleed, so the doctor ordered it removed immediately." He paused. "I'm surprised you didn't wake up. They said you pushed it in farther...that's probably why it hurts so much."  
  
I nodded. "Yeah, that and the biggest bruise I've ever seen." Pressing the call button for a nurse, I then stretched, extending my left arm over my head and I felt my toes curl as I yawned.  
  
I stopped short in the middle of my yawn and dropped my arm. Staring intensely at the sheet draped over my body, I wiggled my toes again. That huge, cheshire cat grin slowly crept onto my face as I spoke. "Hey, Ryan...are my toes moving or am I hallucinating?"  
  
"Your toes are moving..."  
  
I started to laugh, probably sounding insane, but I was so happy I could have gotten up and danced. The nurse walked into the room and smiled at me, obviously curious as to my comical expression on my face. "Can I help you sir?"  
  
"Get my doctor, and tell him I can move my toes!"  
  
"You can?" She looked down at my feet, and I quickly wiggled them. "Excellent!" She quickly moved to the phone on the side of the room and paged the doctor who had been overseeing my care.  
  
I waited excitedly, and only for a few minutes, until my doctor came into the room carrying an armful of charts. "Hello there...I hear we've got good news?"  
  
"Yes we do." I grinned, and then moved my toes under the sheet. "I can move them."  
  
"Great! Now...lets try the rest of your lower half." He gently pulled the sheet off, and setting the chart on the end of my bed, he took my left foot in his hand and asked if I could feel him touching it.  
  
"Yeah, I can." He did the same thing with the other foot, and it was the same result. I could feel every place he poked at my foot, and all the way up both calves was the same. Feeling...all the way up.  
  
"Can you flex your knee for me? Let's start with the right one."  
  
I carefully lifted my leg, with his help, and bent it slightly. The muscles were weak from being unusable for the last week, but the fact of the matter was that I could still move my knee. The left knee behaved just the same way. Moveable.  
  
"Well, with this amount of progress, we'll need to take you up to CT to get some scans of your back to be positive that the swelling has gone down."  
  
"Do I have to go on the bed?" I didn't want to ride through the halls on my back again--the lights passing overhead made me sick enough. "I want a wheelchair to do it in."  
  
Looking around, and checking my vitals, the doctor nodded. "I suppose we can allow that, just this once, only because I know how long you've been lying down."  
  
"Plus, you need to change my sheets and get rid of the blood I dripped all over the place when I did this." I said, motioning to my arm.  
  
"Very true." The doctor grabbed the wheelchair that had been parked beside my bed for days and pulled it along side my bed, while a nurse adjusted my bed so I was sitting straight up.  
  
I carefully slid off the bed and placed my feet on the floor, never so happy to feel cold linoleum in my life. I sat in the wheelchair and nodded at Ryan, who was smiling at me. "I'll be back in a minute buddy."  
  
The nurse wheeled me out of the room and headed for the rear elevators as I blinked my eyes at the brightness of the outside hallway. We successfully navigated the crowded hall and made it into the elevator, and I headed upstairs to get my back scanned.  
  
((JUST THEN....))  
  
~~Jordan~~ I walked through the sliding doors of the hospital's main lobby, smiling as I was dragged in front of Garret by the now grunting bulldog. Keeping my cool, I managed to stop myself in front of the security desk, where Garret asked for two visitor's passes to Nigel's room. After I was properly emblazoned with a sticker proclaiming my destination, Rudy took no time in dragging me and Garret to the elevator.  
  
Upon getting to Nigel's floor, Garret took the lead and walked down the hall to the doorway to his room. He entered, but stopped in the doorway.  
  
"What's wrong Garret?"  
  
"Um...excuse me...where's Nigel?" Garret walked in and tapped the nurse changing the bedsheet of Nigel's bed on the shoulder.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry sir. He was just taken up to CT a few minutes ago." She fluffed the fresh pillow and laid in on his bed.  
  
"He can move his legs."  
  
We both turned around and stared at Ryan, who was smiling at us. "What did you just say?" I tilted my head to the side, unsure of what the boy had just said.  
  
"I said, he can move his legs. And his toes, and his knees...and he can stand on two feet with help." He smiled at us, then at the dog. "What's his name?"  
  
"Rudy...he's a bulldog...he can stand up?" Garret crossed the room and stood next to Ryan's bed.  
  
"Yeah, he can. He made a comment about how cold the floor was too. He should be back from CT any minute now, the doctor just wanted to check the swelling or something like that."  
  
"That's great!" I smiled at Garret, and then at the boy. My smile, however, got even larger when I heard that familiar British voice behind me.  
  
"Jordan Cavanaugh...sneaking animals into the hospital...bad girl."  
  
"Nigel!" I turned around and nearly suffocated him in a tight hug, which only led to excite the bulldog attached to my arm.  
  
"Jordan, I do need to breathe Love...hey Rudy!" He bent over and scratched the dog behind the ears, then moving onto his stomach. "How's it going buddy? They been taking good care of ya?"  
  
"Yes, we have." I smiled, and we sat around and laughed for a good ten or fifteen minutes until Nigel asked to go back in bed.  
  
After a quick hop into his bed, we were about to start talking again when an attending nurse came into the room with a piece of paper. "Excuse me, Mr. Townsend?"  
  
"Yes?" Nigel looked up, away from Rudy who'd now fallen asleep on his lap.  
  
"There's somebody here to see you, but they're not on the list of allowed visitors."  
  
"Who is it?"  
  
"A man by the name of Jonathan Townsend." She paused. "He says he's related to you."  
  
Nigel's face froze. I could tell he was amazed to even hear the name being spoken. After a moment of silence, he nodded. "Send him up."  
  
"Alright sir." The nurse walked out of the room, and I immediately glanced at him.  
  
"Who's Jonathan Townsend?"  
  
"My father."  
  
TBC....  
  
A/N: Well, here's chapter 30! Long as I promised! 


	31. Chapter 31

A/N: Thanks to everybody who reviewed or commented! I really love the fact that you guys take time to tell me what you think!  
  
SPECIAL THANKS TO: jordangirl (Beth) for researching some very important information that I needed for this story for me! All hail the Oracle!  
  
A/N #2: Same time, same place, as chapter 30! Here we go!  
  
********** CHAPTER 30 **********  
  
~~Nigel~~ I shifted uncomfortably in the bed as the nurse left the room to bring my dad up to see me. My face probably spelled out how I felt to Garret and Jordan--complete shock and confusion. I hadn't spoken to the man in years, let alone see him face to face. Ryan, who was as confused as I felt, sat silently as I attempted to process what was happening. My father was actually in the United States, and he was actually here to see me in the hospital. This was either weird, or a mistake of names.  
  
"Do you want us to leave?" Jordan reached over and touched my arm, snapping me back into reality. She looked as if she was worried about me, and she probably was. She knew what the man had done to me...I'd told her myself, and it had been one of the hardest things I had ever done.  
  
Shaking my head, I slowly turned my gaze to Garret. "Not yet...just wait until I ask you to, alright?"  
  
"No problem. We'll stay as long as you need us." He smiled, then looked down at Rudy, who was asleep beside me in bed, snuggled into the thin cotton blanket. "At least he's comfortable."  
  
"Yeah." I gently rubbed behind his ears, smiling when I got a half-awake snort in reply. "He's my little buddy...sleeps on my scrubs and keeps 'em warm for me." I was about to say something else when I heard a soft knock on the doorframe.  
  
All three of us turned our heads at the sound, and I stared blankly at the man who was entering the room.  
  
He'd changed. Last I remembered he still had a full head of dark brown hair, but it was now replaced with a swatch of gray. He was still tall, and still lanky, but his face was slimmer. He carried with him a large, brown cloth bag, and he slowly crossed to my bed. I sat up and felt my back grow tense, and my heart started racing. I was scared, even now.  
  
He stood at the edge of my bed and looked down at me. I'd changed as well. I'd gone from being a rebellious teenager with short black hair to my current state, an adult with my hair the length it was now. Sure, I was covered in bandages and had a tube running out of my chest, but it was still me. We stared silently at each other until he finally spoke.  
  
"Nigel..."  
  
"Yes?" I was amazed at the fact that I even found my voice with my nerves jumping like they were.  
  
"How are you?" He paused and looked down the entire length of me. "You don't look so good."  
  
"I'm alright." Looking over at Jordan and Garret, I attempted not to make eye contact with the man who'd finally come to see me. "I did get shot you know. You don't look too good after you get shot."  
  
"I didn't know." He looked over at Jordan and Garret. "Who are your two friends?"  
  
"I work with them. That's Garret, and that's Jordan." I motioned to them respectively before waiting for his reply.  
  
He extended a hand to the both of them and smiled. "Jonathan Townsend. Pleasure to meet you." After shaking both their hands, he turned back to me. "You never told me you knew people here."  
  
"You never asked, so why did I need to? It's not like you ever call to ask how I am doing." Feeling the pang of hurt inside of me, I heard my voice grow slightly agitated. "Why did I have to almost die to hear from you?"  
  
He turned back and looked at me. "You never called either." His voice grew quieter. "I need to talk to you about something important, and I'd like to do it in private..." Glancing over at Garret and Jordan he nodded. "...without them, preferably."  
  
"We can leave, it's not a problem." Garret stepped forward and held his arms out for Rudy. "You want us to take him?"  
  
"No. Leave him here...if you guys could leave us alone for a while...please?" I looked up at them. Jordan looked at me as if I were crazy, and Garret just nodded before taking Jordan by the arm and starting to walk out.  
  
"We'll be in the waiting room if you need anything Nigel."  
  
"Thanks Garret." I smiled at him, then looked back down at the bulldog sleeping next to me. If only the little bloke knew of the chaos that was probably going to erupt, he would have gladly chosen to go with Garret and Jordan to wait outside of my room.  
  
Turning my attention back to my father, I shook my head. "Why are you really here?"  
  
"Can't a father come visit his son in the hospital?" He pulled up a chair and sat down next to my bed.  
  
"Yes, but it's you. You hate flying, you hate America, and you hate me. That's three against you being here."  
  
"I don't hate you." He sighed. "You just think that because you left on bad terms."  
  
"I left because you made me so mad that I couldn't take being around you anymore. You wrote up the bad terms that I left on."  
  
"You always have to turn this around on me don't you."  
  
"It's your fault." I shifted my weight again and started picking at the spot where my IV had been in. Ignoring the pain, I figured it would be better than looking at him while we were arguing.  
  
"Never mind who's fault it is. That's in the past." He reached out and touched my arm, and I immediately jerked away from him.  
  
I still had that feeling inside. Whenever I looked him in the eyes, or whenever he came near touching me, I got the feeling of utter pain and despair in my chest, and I felt as if I would die if he came near me. Shaking my head, I swallowed deeply. He knew what was wrong--he could read it across my face.  
  
"I'm sorry...I wasn't thinking." He returned his hand to his lap and he shook his head. "I guess you never got over that."  
  
"How could I?" I whispered. The man before me had beat me. Abused me. Scared me. Treated me so horrible I would feel the need to run away from him, to run away from my life, to hurt myself. It was because of him that I'd taken up cutting myself as an escape from the pain he inflicted every day of my life. I subconsciously rubbed my shoulder--the site of hundreds of paper-thin white scars, each bearing the weight of severe pain and suffering, each a mark of fear that couldn't be taken out of my life. He'd found them once--questioned me relentlessly on their existence, but I couldn't get brave enough to tell him what was really wrong, the fact that he was hurting me inside, long after the pain from the hitting had faded.  
  
Upon seeing me touch my shoulder, I saw his face fall. "Nigel...listen...I need to apologize for what I did to you."  
  
"You don't mean that. You knew what you were doing." I shook my head. I was NOT about to accept a half-hearted apology from a man who had done the things he'd done.  
  
"You're right. I did know what I was doing, but I was too frustrated to stop myself. What I did was wrong--I knew that. You were the victim of all of my anger and my sadness, and you never should have been...your mother's death didn't help either."  
  
"Like it's her fault and she had anything to do with it. You wouldn't listen to her when she yelled at you to stop hurting me, you just yelled back." I wrapped an arm around the softly snoring bulldog at my waist. "You don't care how I felt about myself when you hurt me."  
  
He sat silently.  
  
"See. You don't even care about me now. You just came here to ask me for something, and me nearly getting killed just gave you a nice cover-up. What is it this time?" I paused, feeling the anger inside of me rise. "You get laid off? You not have enough beer to get you through the week? You haven't been laid in a week? What is it?" I threw my arms open wide. "Go ahead. Hit me. Get it over with, I know that's what you want to do. Ten years or so without your little punching bag lying around...I beat you've got some good cases of anger to throw out on me this time."  
  
"I came because I needed to apologize."  
  
"No you didn't." I glared at him. "You couldn't have. Parent's who hurt their kids don't apologize, they only hit harder. In that case...I'm up for getting knocked so good I go unconscious...maybe even into a coma. I'm a bit overdue for a wallop, don't ya think?!"  
  
"Nigel...listen to me. I--"  
  
I cut him off before he could finish. "You aren't sorry. You meant everything you did, you even said so yourself. You want nothing more than to whack me a good one across the face. You want--"  
  
"I want to tell you that I'm dying." He cut me off short of finishing my sentence, and I shut up. "All I wanted to tell you today is that I'm sick."  
  
My brain nearly stopped short when he said that he was sick. I shook my head. I didn't believe him. "With what?"  
  
"I have portal cirrhosis."  
  
I shook my head. "Which is?" For the life of me, my information from years at college and my classes disappeared and escaped my head when he said the name.  
  
"The cells in my liver are dying and being replaced with scar tissue instead of re-growing." He paused. "It's because I drank so much after your mother died...I never stopped until the doctor told me I was sick."  
  
"That doesn't mean you're dying." I looked up at him, noticing the pain that was in his face.  
  
"Yes, it does. Without a liver transplant, my body will stop filtering blood as well, and it'll spread to my other organs...the doctors say at the stage I'm at now, I only have three months."  
  
For some reason, my heart dropped out of my chest and hit the floor. I started feeling very awkward--the man sitting next to me had hurt me all my life, but he was also my father, and I couldn't deny that fact if I tried. I couldn't speak, so he continued on.  
  
"I came here to tell you that I was sick...and I was supposed to give you this..." He reached into the bag which until this moment had gone untouched and pulled out a package wrapped in plain brown paper. He held onto it for a moment, then sighed. "Your mother wanted me to give this to you when you moved out, but I never got the chance because you left after we fought that one night." Handing the package to me, he smiled weakly.  
  
I took it from him slowly, then set it on my lap. Carefully picking at the yellowed tape that held it together, I unwrapped the item as slowly as I could, careful to make sure that I didn't tear anything accidentally. It was a box, wrapped in the paper, and I opened the flaps and peeked inside, curious as to what was contained in the box.  
  
"You were only ten when she got sick...but you still knew what was going on...you've always been a smart little bugger." He smiled at me as I opened the box. "I don't know what's in there, she never told me and made me promise not to open it."  
  
I reached inside and pulled out a plain white envelope, now yellowed with age, that had my name across the front of it in the obvious script of a female. I tore it open carefully, and I unfolded a single sheet of stationary paper to see it covered in handwriting in neat little rows.  
  
Reading through it silently, I realized that it was a letter from my mother, to me in the future, after her death. The general tone of the letter was positive, but I caught myself choking back a tear occasionally upon the mention of an event that I remembered or a song that she'd sung to me when I was little. After I'd finished, I placed it aside and reached back into the box.  
  
Pulling out a well-worn and aged teddy bear, I smiled to myself. I had been given the bear at birth by my grandmother, and rarely had it left my presence during my young years of life. Through countless days of me being sick and him being there to keep me company while I was snuggled up in bed, the many times I had dragged the little guy out into the backyard of our house to be daringly rescued by myself or one of my friends, even to the tragic moments of him being given a bath in the washing machine (frightening in itself).  
  
"I remember how you gave that to mom when she got sick...she was so touched that you gave him up to make her feel better...you made her very happy, Nigel."  
  
I had given the bear to her on one of our trips to visit her in the hospital, because I didn't want her to be alone after we left. The look on her face had been priceless...even with how bad I knew she was hurting because of the medications and treatments she was on for the cancer.  
  
Also in the box was a small photo album, containing various photos of all of us together in random places or on family vacations to the shores or up north. As I flipped through the pages, I pointed out pictures to my father, and I had to ask him who a lot of the people were because I couldn't remember ever meeting them.  
  
I thought the box was empty, but I noticed in the bottom that there was another wrapped item that I had missed before. I unwrapped it to find a well used copy of the Bible that I recognized immediately. She always used to read me stories out of it--thrilling tales of ordinary people doing amazing things. I gently opened it to where the ribbon used as a bookmark had been placed, and a wallet sized picture of me and her sat inside. It had been taken before she had gotten sick, and I was still young, when she had taken me to visit my uncle and aunt once.  
  
Closing the book, I looked up at my dad, who had tears in his eyes. It was obvious that he had been watching me look though everything, and I'm sure it was painful for him to remember mom getting sick and losing her to the cancer. We didn't speak for a few minutes, we just stared at each other's faces silently.  
  
"You know...she loved you so much...and she was afraid you wouldn't understand what was going on and that she was dying." He finally spoke, after clearing his throat a few times. "The only thing that hurts me is that I have nothing to offer you that can make up for what I did to you...but I'm afraid I'm going to die and you won't realize that I'm truly sorry."  
  
"You can't change the past...but I see often enough how bad it hurts to lose somebody you love. The worst one's are when they never got to say goodbye...I don't want to go through that again." I cleared my throat, as I heard my voice waver ever so slightly.  
  
"I just want you to know that I'm sorry...you don't have to forgive me, and honestly I don't expect you to. I can't even forgive my self for hurting you the way I did."  
  
"But I do forgive you, Dad." I softly said the words that I had swore I would never say to him so long ago. His argument of apology had been convincing enough, and thinking back to the agony I'd seen children go through at the loss of their parents made me rethink my stance of hatred against him.  
  
"You do?" He looked at me, almost in shock.  
  
"Yeah. You may have meant it...but it's not worth you going through more pain than you're going through already...and that you're going to go through." I looked over at him. "Are you going to stay in the States for treatment or are you going back home?"  
  
"I was planning on heading back home after I knew you were alright...and after I apologized. I figured you wouldn't want me here anyways."  
  
"Well...besides the fact that I'm stuck in here for a few more days, you're more than welcome to stay here for a while...do you have a hotel or anything?"  
  
"I just got in off the flight this morning...I haven't made arrangements yet."  
  
"Then...I suppose you could stay at my flat...but you'll have to feed the cat and the dog for me..." I looked down at the mass on my bed, who was just now awakening. "This is Rudy."  
  
"I could do that...if you're sure that's alright with you..."  
  
"Whatever you want to do. It's just a little place...bedroom, bathroom...kitchen and a living room. But it's enough for me--it's probably a mess though. I'll have Garret get you a key and show you where it is." I then pressed the call button on my bed to summon up a nurse. "They only take a minute or two to get in here to figure out what the hell I want."  
  
He laughed. "Prompt service...something you'd hope for in a hospital."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
A nurse walked in, exactly (according to my dad who was timing it) three minutes and twenty seven seconds later. "What can I help you with today?"  
  
"Can you ask Garret and Jordan to come back in here please?"  
  
"Certainly." She then exited the room to get them, while we started chatting again.  
  
Surprisingly, this had gone a lot better than I had hoped, and I was glad. Now...just to get me out of the hospital and away from that jello....  
  
TBC...  
  
**thanks for reading!** 


	32. Chapter 32

Breaking Through  
  
A/N: Sorry this has taken so long for an update...even though it's only one chapter, I've had issues with writing it. I would look at it, and just not be *feeling* what I was writing so I left it alone. Now it is finished, at least to the best of my ability.  
  
Thank you also to all those who have reviewed my story, it makes me proud to see that people like what I write!  
  
This chapter takes place about 3 months after the previous one. Yeah, I know, long time gap...sorry...but I just couldn't work it out. So some history:  
  
Nigel's father has returned to the UK and is receiving treatment for the liver problems but his condition is worsening rapidly. Nigel himself has returned to work at the morgue, and has been going to physical therapy to build up the strength in his legs again. But enough chat. Let's get to the good stuff!  
  
*****CHAPTER 32*****  
  
~Nigel~  
  
I glanced around my office at the stacks of paperwork that buried almost everything in the radius of my desk and it's surroundings. I lowered my head into my hands and sighed as I rubbed my eyes. The darkened room and halls were silent, save for the occasional noise that the lights overhead emitted. I looked back up at my computer screen and blinked slowly, trying to clear my vision and remove the haze that was running through my line of sight.  
  
I checked the schedule posted on my wall and noticed that everyone had the night off except for me and an unfortunate lab tech. He was off in the lab running a heavy test load that Garret had ordered on one of the latest cases...poor guy.  
  
Shaking my head, I opened another file and grabbed a pen. I proceeded to fill out the various case forms and sign on all the dotted lines where it was needed. I muttered aloud "Man...this is harsh..." before shutting the folder and moving onto the next one.  
  
I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew the lab tech was tapping me on the shoulder trying to get me to wake up. Groggy, I opened my eyes and sat up, wincing at the pain I was in for falling asleep on my desk. The tech handed me a folder full of results and walked out of the room. Checking the clock on my computer, I noticed that it was five thirty in the morning...the next shift should be arriving at six and then I can get out of here.  
  
"Hey Nige! How are you this morning?" Jordan poked her head in the doorway with a smile on her face.  
  
I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Bloody splendid. I fell asleep at my desk and it feels like my back's on fire."  
  
She crossed the room to my desk and hugged me around the neck. "Aww poor baby..." She smiled.  
  
I was about to answer her with a comeback when Emmy walked in the room while knocking on the doorframe. "Dr. Townsend, there's an international call from England for you on line 3...they say it's urgent."  
  
"Alright Emmy. Thanks." I leaned over to pick up the phone.  
  
"Jordan patted me on the shoulder and headed for the door. "I'll talk to you in a bit."  
  
'Okay." I pressed the button for line 3. "This is Dr. Townsend."  
  
*over the phone*  
  
"Hello Dr. Townsend...this is Dr. Herth at The Royal Marsden cancer center in London. I'm calling in regards to your father, Mr. Jonathan Townsend."  
  
I nodded. "How is he?"  
  
"Sir, I'm afraid that he won't make it through the night...his jaundice has worsened and the dialysis isn't having any effect on clearing his blood of the impurities...his kidneys are too badly damaged."  
  
I paused and allowed him to continue.  
  
"Dr. Townsend...I would suggest that if you are planning on coming to London to visit your father that you leave as soon as possible...given the severity of his situation."  
  
"I understand." I stretched an arm out on my desk. "I'll leave immediately."  
  
"Alright. Again...sir, we're terribly sorry to have to call you with this sort of news but..."  
  
"It's fine. Thank you for calling." I then hung up the phone and stared at it for a minute before I was interrupted by Jordan calling my name from the doorway.  
  
"Nigel...Nige...you alright? What'd they say?"  
  
I turned and looked at her. "I need to get to London...they don't think he'll last through tonight." I stood and grabbed my jacket off my chair and headed for the door. "If Garret asks, I'm taking the week off."  
  
She touched my arm. "Nigel...wait."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Let me get my coat." She turned to head for her office.  
  
"Jordan...what are you talking about?"  
  
"I'm not letting you fly halfway around the world to watch your father die by yourself. I'm coming with you." She ran down the hall and ducked into her office, emerging with her coat and her purse. "Let's go."  
  
"Jordan. No. You don't have to do this...I can go by myself."  
  
"I know you can. I just don't want you to." She smiled up at me, then tugged on my arm. "If we haul ass, we can make it on a morning flight out of Boston to Heathrow."  
  
Sighing, I nodded. "Let's go. Call the airline on the way to my apartment so I can grab some clothes?"  
  
"Sure thing." She walked with me to the elevator and we nearly sprinted out into the parking lot to my truck.  
  
*** 2 hours later ***  
  
((Logan International Airport - 8 am Boston Time))  
  
*loudspeaker* "Last boarding call for British Airways flight 323 at gate 17."  
  
I handed my ticket to the person at the gate and smiled at Jordan. "We made it." I took the stub back and walked towards the hall to the plane.  
  
"Barely." Jordan caught up to me, smiling. "At least we didn't have to check any bags."  
  
I nodded. "We wouldn't of made it if we had to have done that." We entered the aircraft and quickly found ours seats, stashing our duffel bags in the overhead storage compartment and our backpacks under the seat in front of us. Checking my ticket, I looked at Jordan. "You want the window?"  
  
"Nah. You can take it. You're taller anyways." She glanced at the flight attendants walking through the aisles of the aircraft. "Now sit before we get pounced on."  
  
I slipped into my seat, Jordan quickly sitting next to me. We had been lucky to get seats together on such short notice, but as I looked around I noticed that the flight was not that full and there were several empty seats around the cabin. As the plane taxied for the runway, I had to try to not laugh as Jordan mimicked the flight attendants doing their little "two exits on this side, two exits on this side, oxygen mask goes like this" speech.  
  
As the plane slipped into the morning sky, I glanced out the window at the Atlantic ocean, knowing what was awaiting for me on the other side.  
  
((Heathrow International Airport - 8 pm London Time))  
  
I smiled at Jordan as we entered the terminal off the plane. She'd fallen asleep for a good portion of the flight and she was a lot more rested than I was. I'd been awake, staring at the waters below us and thinking silently to myself for the 6 hours we'd been on the plane. After navigating our way through the crowd of people holding those silly little signs with a person's name on it, we emerged into the center of the airport.  
  
Jordan looked around and then at me. "I sure as hell hope you know where you're going."  
  
"I've been here a few times." I led the way towards the exit to the street. We emerged into the cold London night, and Jordan glanced at the sky.  
  
"It's clear." She looked over at me.  
  
"Yeah? So?" I glanced around for a cab and hailed for one.  
  
"Isn't London weather supposed to suck?"  
  
I rolled my eyes and opened the door of the cab that stopped in front of us. "I don't believe I should dignify that with a response."  
  
She hopped in the cab and I followed suit. "The Royal Marsden cancer center , please." As we pulled away from the curb, I looked over at her. "It doesn't always suck...at least there isn't any snow."  
  
"I like the snow." Jordan laughed and then looked out the window. "So this is London at night huh?" "Yeah. This is it." I looked out my window and nodded to myself. Here I was, back in London...surprisingly coming back for the same reason that I left in the first place.  
  
"So...what's the bet that Garret's gonna throttle me when we get back?" Jordan poked me in the arm. "I mean...we just kind of left work."  
  
Leaning back against the seat of the cab, I shook my head. "You never told anyone we were leaving...did you?"  
  
"No. I just followed you out."  
  
"Wonderful." I smiled at her. "Garret's gonna kill both of us."  
  
"At least we'll go together?"  
  
"Yeah." I smiled again, then looked out the window as the cab pulled to a stop in front of a building. "I guess we're here." I pulled some cash out of my pocket, paid the fare, and opened the door, holding it for Jordan as I climbed out. Shouldering my bags, I waited for Jordan to get hers and then I looked up at the sign directing where all the departments were at the center.  
  
We walked into the building and Jordan went up to the desk asking for information on my father as I wandered around the waiting room, unsure of what she was going to find out. I made a mental note to call Garret as soon as I figured out what was going on.  
  
"Nigel?" Jordan tapped me on the shoulder and I turned to look at her. "They said that they're going to have a doctor come out and talk to us in a few minutes."  
  
"Did they tell you if he was..."  
  
"No. They said that the doctor had to do all that."  
  
I nodded. "Alright."  
  
A tall man walked out to the desk and asked the receptionist something, then walked over to us. He extended his hand and introduced himself. "I'm Doctor Herth...I've been working your father's illness since he was admitted here. I presume you are his son?"  
  
"Nigel Townsend." I shook his hand and motioned to Jordan. "This is my friend Jordan Cavanaugh."  
  
Jordan smiled at him and then looked back at me. "So...what's the news on Jonathan?"  
  
Dr. Herth nodded. "He's still alive at the moment...but he had to be put on oxygen about three hours ago to improve his breathing." He frowned. "I'm sorry to say it, but all the signs are showing that he won't survive for much longer in his current condition."  
  
I nodded. "So can we go see him?"  
  
"Yes. I'll escort you up to his room." He turned and we followed him through the back doors into the main part of the hospital. He took us to the ICU and stopped outside a doorway. "This is his room. Now...normally we don't allow anyone except for family and close friends in, one at a time, but with the severity of his condition, we can make an exception for both of you to go in."  
  
Jordan looked at me. "How about you go in and have a few minutes by yourself while I go call Garret and try to get him to not fire us? I'll get back as soon as I can...but I can stay with you if you don't want to be alone."  
  
I shook my head. "Good idea. I'll be fine for a few minutes." I smiled at Jordan, then turned and walked into the room as she headed outside.  
  
~~Jordan~~  
  
I walked outside, estimated the mandatory 100 feet from the hospital for use of cell phones, and dialed the morgue. I was guessing that Garret was still there, even though it was getting a bit late. *Probably hunting me down and sending out a death warrant* I thought to myself.  
  
The phone rang several times before I heard Emmy answer it. I partly disguised my voice and told her to connect me to "Doctor Macy's office."  
  
I heard the noise of that god awful hold music, and then Garret's voice.  
  
**phone**  
  
"This is Doctor Macy."  
  
"Hey Garret...it's me."  
  
"Jordan?! Where the hell are you?!"  
  
I winced as he yelled. I heard a door slam, presumably his office door.  
  
"Jordan! Answer me."  
  
"I'm in London." There was a long pause on the line. "Garret?"  
  
"Why in the hell are you in London?! And let me guess, Nigel is with you?!"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Why?!" I heard him sigh angrily on the line.  
  
"Let me talk? Without interrupting?"  
  
"Go."  
  
"Alright. Nigel got a phone call from the hospital over here this morning telling him he needed to come over to London right away because his dad wasn't going to make it through the night and he nearly ran out of work but I went with him because I didn't want him coming over here alone and I just...forgot to tell you." I babbled the entire story out like I was a young child being scolded, ignoring all use of pauses or even breathing. "I'm sorry?"  
  
There was another long pause before he spoke. "Jordan...how bad is he?"  
  
"Who? Nigel or Nigel's dad?"  
  
"Both of them."  
  
"Well...Nigel's dad is still alive but probably won't be for much longer...and I'm not really sure about Nige. He's been pretty quiet this whole time." I looked back at the hospital. "Garret...it was just so sudden that we weren't thinking and it just sorta happened..."  
  
"It's alright. Listen. If you're not back here in a week..."  
  
"I'll be back. I swear. And we'll pull doubles for a month." I smiled to myself. "I promise."  
  
"Alright. I'll talk to you later. I want to calling me if anything happens."  
  
"I will. Thanks Garret." I hung up the phone after he said good bye and then I quickly headed back into the building to find Nigel and figure out what was going on.  
  
TBC...  
  
Long chapter for your enjoyment! Reviews are greatly appreciated! 


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33 of "Breaking Through"  
  
A/N: Right after 32.  
  
********* Chapter 33 *********  
  
~~Jordan~~  
  
I quickly headed back into the building and towards the room where Nigel and his dad were. When I got there, I paused outside of the door for a moment. I peeked my head into the doorway and saw Nigel sitting by a bed, his head bowed to his hands. I couldn't decide if I wanted to go in and be with him or if I should give him some time alone. As I stood in the doorway thinking to myself, I noticed that Nigel was talking. I contemplated trying to hear what he was saying, but I shook my head and let him be. I glanced around the hall and saw a plastic chair near the other side of the corridor. Sneakily, I scampered down the hall and pilfered the chair, sitting outside the door to the room.  
  
An hour must have gone by before I got up and checked on Nigel again. He was still sitting next to the bed, but he was leaned back in the chair and staring at the wall. I walked into the room and smiled as I sat in the chair next to him. "Nige? You alright?"  
  
"Look at him Jordan." Nigel looked over at me, then back at his dad.  
  
I looked. Sure, I'd seen him before...but he looked worse than I could have imagined. His skin was yellowed, and he was hooked up to a ventilator and a dialysis machine that was filtering his blood constantly. I stared at him for a moment before looking back at Nigel.  
  
"Look at him." He bit his lower lip and winced.  
  
"I see him Nigel." I reached over and touched Nigel's arm. "Hey-"  
  
He jerked his arm away from me. "Don't. Just don't." His head turned away from me and dropped into his hands.  
  
I slowly pulled my hand back and rested it in my lap. "Sorry...I just..." I stopped talking and looked back at his father. Feeling the slight sting of tears in my eyes, I told myself that he was just hurting, hurting more than I could know, and I calmed down.  
  
"Nigel...is that you?"  
  
I turned and saw a woman standing in the doorway. She was older, and she looked like she was related to Nigel.  
  
He lifted his head and nodded. "Hello Auntie." Slowly, he stood and crossed the room to her. Embracing her, he stood in silence for a moment before turning to me. "This is my friend, Jordan...she came over here with me."  
  
"Hello dear...I'm Janice...Nigel's aunt...but call me auntie." She walked over to me and smiled.  
  
I stood and gave the woman a hug. "Alright." I offered her my chair, and she graciously accepted.  
  
"Thank you so much. Too much London traffic can make you tired."  
  
"I bet." I smiled at the woman, before motioning for Nigel to take my chair. "Nigel...sit."  
  
"No...I'm fine." Nigel shook his head.  
  
In my head, I knew he wasn't alright. He was paler than normal, and his eyes were red and he was shaking ever so slightly. I walked over and guided him towards the chair. "Please...babe...sit..."  
  
He sank into the chair without another word.  
  
"I'm surprised you came so soon." Nigel's aunt leaned over and touched Nigel on the knee. "I mean...we haven't heard from you in years and all of a sudden you're here."  
  
"That's how I felt when dad showed up in Boston after I got shot." Nigel looked up at her. "And we patched up a lot of our problems. So it was the least I could do, come back here and be with him before he..." He swallowed hard and sighed. "Jordan..."  
  
"Yeah Nige?" I turned my attention to him.  
  
"Listen...could you give us a few minutes with dad? Please?" He looked at me, his eyes pleading with me.  
  
"Sure. No problem." I smiled, then turned and walked out of the room. I walked down the hall to the front desk and waited for the attendant to notice that I was standing there.  
  
"Can I help you?"  
  
"I was wondering if you could tell me where the maternity ward is?" I smiled at the woman. "My friend is in ICU with his father and I wanted to go look at all the babies."  
  
"Sure thing sweetheart." The nurse pointed at a doorway. "Just head through those doors, and right past the chapel you'll come to a split in the hallway. Make a left, then all the way at the end is the maternity ward. There are signs marking the way to go, so it's pretty easy."  
  
"Thanks." I smiled again, then left on my hunt to find the little ones. I found my way there quite easily, and I sat and looked through the glass at all the parents cuddling with their newborns. It almost made me start to cry, but I managed to wipe away my few tears and smile at the happy families.  
  
After an hour or so, I turned and headed back towards the ICU. But as I passed through the halls, I walked past the chapel and found my footsteps slowing. I reversed my course and entered the darkened room, standing hesitant in the doorway. The church and I had never really gotten along...  
  
Slipping into the back row of pews, I sat quietly and stared straight ahead at the altar. I wasn't sure what had gotten into me, but I felt as if I might as well say something. Bowing my head, I muttered a quick prayer that I had learned as a child, before mom had been killed. Wiping a tear from my eye as I finished, I walked to the front of the room and lit a candle, then turned and walked out.  
  
When I entered the hall of the ICU, I suddenly had a sense of dread fall over me. I quickened my pace until I found myself standing outside the door to Jonathan's room. I entered slowly, and shivered when I noticed that all the machines had been turned off and Nigel's aunt was sitting and sobbing.  
  
Nigel was leaning against the wall and staring at the bed where his father's body lay. Unmoving, his face was void of all emotion and sense of life. I bit my lip and walked over to Nigel and looked up at him. He ignored me and continued to stare at his father. Leaning down, he touched his father's arm and shuddered.  
  
"Nigel..." I spoke softly, not knowing what to say to try to comfort him.  
  
"Jordan...please..." Nigel turned and looked at me, his eyes dull and blank. He took a step away from the bed and looked at his aunt. "Auntie?"  
  
"Yes Nigel?" She looked up at him.  
  
"Have Jordan take you back to the house...when you're ready to leave." He looked over at me and sighed. "Can you do that Jordan?"  
  
I nodded. "Sure...what about you?"  
  
He turned and walked towards the doorway. "There's somewhere I gotta go."  
  
I shook my head. "You're not going by yourself. I'm coming with you."  
  
Nigel shook his head. "No. You're not." He walked out of the room without another word, and I started after him.  
  
His aunt grabbed my arm. "Sweetheart...let him go."  
  
"I can't! What if he does something stupid?" I looked at the doorway.  
  
"He won't. Believe me. Nigel's always had his own way of coping with things. Besides...when we were sitting here talking when you left for a while...he told me some things."  
  
"About?" I sat in the chair next to her. "About what?"  
  
"About how he considers you to be his best friend, and about how grateful he is that you came with him over here without even thinking about yourself." His aunt shrugged. "He'll be alright. When they came in and turned off the monitors after he passed away...he told me to tell you not to worry about him. That he'd be safe. He promised."  
  
"But I can't let him walk away like that..."  
  
"Listen Jordan. He's hurting. And he needs you...just believe me...he needs to do some things first, by himself. It will hit him later...and he'll need someone there to help him." She stood up and smiled. "You know how to drive in England?"  
  
I shook my head.  
  
"I didn't think so. Let's get going home." She turned back towards Jonathan. "Goodbye Jon." She paused for a moment, then turned back to me and headed for the door. As we walked down the hall and out into the London night, I noticed that it was raining.  
  
I laughed to myself.  
  
"What?" His aunt turned to look at me as we walked under the covered walkway to the parking garage.  
  
"Here it is. I knew the weather was bad." I looked out at the dark sky that covered the stars and wondered where Nigel was. I was worrying about him...I didn't like the fact that he was out there alone somewhere. When we got to the car, Janice motioned for me to get in the passenger side. As we pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the house, we rode in silence.  
  
"Jordan...Nigel is going to be alright...I promise sweetie." She looked over and smiled at me, then continued to concentrate on driving. I didn't answer her, but just stared out the window at the rainy night. As we pulled up in front of the house, she parked in the garage and opened the car door. "I put you and Nigel's stuff in the trunk...help me get it out?"  
  
"Sure." I got out of the car and walked back to the trunk. I grabbed my bags and Nigel's duffel bag and his aunt grabbed Nigel's backpack. As we walked through the door and into the house, I looked around and smiled. It was a very nice house...small, but nice.  
  
"I was meaning to ask you and Nigel if you'd want to share the upstairs bedroom or if I should make up the sofa...there's two beds up in the room..." She looked at me.  
  
"That would be fine. I don't think he'll mind." I smiled and headed for the stairs following her.  
  
"I'll just make sure that you're comfortable, and then I'll let you get to sleep. I'm sure you're absolutely exhausted from your traveling!" She opened the door to the bedroom. "Here you are. Bathroom's down the hall on the left, if you need anything, feel free to use it. Kitchen's downstairs..." She set Nigel's bag down next to one of the beds. "Goodnight...and don't worry about Nigel...he'll probably come home later tonight." She smiled at me, then turned and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.  
  
I looked over at the bed and smiled. A bed had never looked so good. I quickly changed into some sweats and a tank top and crawled in under the covers, listening to the sound of rain falling on the roof. I was still worried about him...but the day's events had taken their toll and I soon fell sound asleep.  
  
TBC...  
  
**A/N: Next chapter...find out where Nigel is and what he's up to...reviews appreciated...** 


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34 of "Breaking Through"  
  
A/N: Right after 33.  
  
********* Chapter 34 *********  
  
~~Nigel~~ I stumbled out of the brightly lit hospital and into the cold, wet air of a rainy London night. I couldn't breathe. I wasn't thinking straight. I was shaking like a leaf. Hailing for a cab, one soon pulled up to the curb and I slid into the backseat.  
  
"Where'll it be tonight mate?" The cab driver turned and looked at me.  
  
I thought for a minute. "The Old Red Lion. On High Holborn..." I couldn't remember the exact address to save my life...  
  
"Don't worry. I'm quite aware of where the Lion is..." he smiled at me, then started driving away from the hospital.  
  
We rode in silence, which was strange for London cab rides. The Lion was on the west side of London, so we had to go across town to get there. I leaned my head back against the seat and sighed. Frowning to myself, I worried about Jordan and how she was going to react to all this. I had just...up and left work, now I was up and leaving her at the hospital. My train of though wandered until I felt the cab driver tap me on the leg.  
  
"Hey...we're here, mate."  
  
I looked up at him. "Oh, sorry." I dug into my pocket and pulled out an American $20 bill. I handed it to him. "Here. Keep it."  
  
"Is that all you've got?"  
  
I nodded. "Yeah...the rest of my cash is in my bag...which is at home."  
  
He handed the twenty back to me and hit the paid button on the meter. "You're gonna need this inside."  
  
I smiled. "You sure?"  
  
He nodded and motioned for me to get out of the cab. "Look here. This guy's piss drunk and he probably lives a LONG way away from here..." He pointed to a man sitting on the curb. "Don't worry about it."  
  
Reaching forwards, I shook his hand. "Thanks." Climbing out of the cab, I took a look up at the face of the building. I hadn't been here in ages...  
  
I pushed open the door and walked into the smoke filled room. It was relatively busy for being this late in the evening, but the Lion was one of the only all hours pubs in the city. Crossing the room, I sat down at a table against the back wall and was soon greeted by a woman taking drink orders. Ordering a pint of guiness, I smiled at her and then surveyed the rest of the room. It was still full of the same type of people who had been here when I was a kid. The smokers, the bohemians...outcasts of society, you know the type.  
  
The woman brought my drink back and set it on the table before turning and heading for the other tables with their drinks. I took a sip off of mine and sighed. There was another bar where I could do the same thing...only that one was back in Boston with my life. My friends. My family. Only that bar was run by Jordan's dad...her dad...  
  
The thought of it made me take a long drink off my pint and cough. I stared down at the table, tracing my fingers in the grain of the rough hewn wood. It was still like I remembered it...even though I never really drank here when I came here with my dad. I was too young, and it was after my mother had died and he started drinking again. Yet, he would drag me along and make me sit with him because he didn't want to leave me at the house by myself.  
  
I drained the rest of my beer and motioned for another one to be brought to the table. While I was waiting, a man walked up and stood on the other side of the table from me. I looked up at him. "Yes?"  
  
"You look like you need somebody to talk to...and you look familiar." He sat in a chair at the table and pulled a pack of smokes out of his pocket. He took one, stuck it in his mouth, and lit up. "You want one?"  
  
Considering the fact that I didn't really care what I did at the moment, I nodded and took one. I hadn't smoked in probably...since I went to the States. But I still knew how. Placing it in my mouth, I reached for his lighter and lit mine. The acidic smoke burned down my throat as I inhaled, but I didn't cough. Reaching for my new beer as the woman set it down, I took a long drink off of it and shook my head. "You said I looked familiar?"  
  
He nodded. "Yeah. Something about you reminds me of a friend of mine."  
  
"Who's your friend?" I took another drag off the cigarette and exhaled deeply.  
  
"You probably don't know him...I'm probably just being odd." He smiled and took a drink off the beer he had ordered. "Jon."  
  
I swallowed hard. "Jon what?" Taking another breath, I exhaled the smoke into the room.  
  
"Ugden." He looked at me funny. "Why, you know a Jon that comes here?"  
  
"Came here." I glanced down at the table, then took another drink off my beer. Finishing that, I finished the cigarette as well. "Never mind though. I don't want to talk about it." I looked at him.  
  
"Fine by me, mate. You don't have to talk." He ordered another two beers for himself and two for me. "You don't live here in London do you?"  
  
"I used to." I shrugged. "And I'm back."  
  
"Where do you live now?" He put the two beers in front of me. "Here. I know only someone who's come here before would be brave enough to try these."  
  
Reaching for the bottle, I tipped it back and drank about half of it. "I've been here." I said as I set the bottle on the table. "What's it to you?"  
  
"Nothing, I was just wondering, that's all." He shrugged and leaned back in his chair. "Sorry if I made you mad."  
  
"It's not you." I drank the rest of that beer and started on the next one. "I'm just not in the mood. Alright?" I coughed weakly and stared back down at the table top.  
  
We sat in silence, drinking and staring. I must have shut up for an hour or so, because he was the first to speak. "Hey."  
  
"What?" I looked across the table at him.  
  
"It's been a while...when are you headed home? I've gotta get home to my girl." He stood up and extended his hand. "Nice meeting you."  
  
Standing, I took his hand and shook it. "I'm going somewhere pretty close. I'll walk."  
  
We both walked together up to the bar, and I laid the twenty on the bar. "Enough?" I looked at the woman who was in charge of tabs.  
  
"Yeah." She started to make change for me, but I shook my head.  
  
"Keep it." I nudged it towards her, then turned and walked out of the pub into the cold air. It was just before dawn, and the rain had stopped and was now just more of a mist. "If I don't see you around..."  
  
"Yeah. Nice meeting you, mate." He handed me his pack of cigarettes and his lighter. "You'll need these." The man climbed into a waiting cab and drove off as I turned and headed down the street.  
  
Shoving my hands into my pockets, I walked along the road in silence. I knew the way home. Sure, it was a little farther than I had let on...more like two miles, but I wanted to think. As I walked through the crowded buildings in Westside that were just coming alive for the morning business, I kept to myself. Turning the corner at the edge of town, I headed down a muddy dirt road which led to the edge of the city. The fact that I was wearing jeans and walking through knee high wet grass soon meant that the denim was damp up to my thighs. As I passed the houses on the edge of town, I started remembering all the times that I'd walked this road by myself. Now was just another one of those times.  
  
The affects of the alcohol were starting to wear off, and I felt the tell tale sign of a headache forming in the back of my head. Reaching back into my pockets, I noticed the pack of cigarettes and the lighter. I pulled them out while I stopped walking. Staring at them in my hands, I contemplated lighting another one...and it didn't take long for me to put one to my lips and click the lighter. I slipped the pack and lighter back into my pocket, then continued walking towards the house.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I opened my eyes and was at first confused as to where I was. Worriedly, I looked around before I remembered I was at Nigel's aunt's house. I glanced over at the other bed and noticed that it was still empty. Not wanting to go against the fact that he might be downstairs or on a couch, I got up, pulled a sweatshirt over my tank top, and headed downstairs.  
  
I saw Nigel's aunt rummaging in the cabinets when I poked my head into the kitchen. She turned and smiled when she saw me in the doorway. "Good Morning."  
  
Walking into the room, I looked around. "Morning..." I paused and looked at her.  
  
"Not yet..." She sighed and looked out the window that faced the city. "He's not back yet."  
  
"Oh." I sat down at the kitchen table and ran my fingers through my hair. "Has he called or anything?" I looked around the room at all the pictures on the walls. "Anything?"  
  
"No." She turned and handed me a cup of coffee. "You're very lucky I keep coffee for the occasional guest that doesn't drink tea..."  
  
I smiled and took the cup from her. "How'd you know that I don't drink tea?" I sipped the hot drink carefully, grateful for it being so warm. "Nigel tell you?"  
  
"Yes, he did. When we were in the hospital. Are you hungry for anything?" She smiled and returned to the cabinet.  
  
"No, thank you. I normally don't eat breakfast." I stood and walked over to the wall with my coffee. "Is this Nige?" I pointed to a picture on the wall.  
  
She walked over behind me. "Yes, that's him when he was...17 I think. Cute little bugger he was...still is, mind you." Looking over the pictures she pointed another one out. "This is him and his mother. He was only seven when this one was taken."  
  
"Was that before she got sick?" I looked over at Janice and took a sip of my coffee.  
  
"Yeah...it was." She looked over at me. "So I take it he's told you?"  
  
"About his mom, yeah." I nodded.  
  
"Has he told you about how his dad reacted?" She turned and sat down at the table. "After she died?"  
  
"Yeah I know he got in a big fight when he was 19 or so with him...that's why he joined the military." I sat at the table across from her. "Is there more?"  
  
"There is...but..." She paused before continuing. "He has a tendency not to talk about his dad and his past right?" When I nodded, she nodded too. "Yeah...have you ever seen him without a shirt on?"  
  
"I...when he was in the hospital but he was so bandaged up that I couldn't see any skin..."  
  
"Well...right after she died, Jonathan got very withdrawn. He would drink...a lot and Nigel would just try and stay out of his way if he got mad." She sighed. "There was this one night...it was in the winter...coldest one we've had in a long time. It was about a year after she died...Jonathan was out drinking with a group of buddies, as usual, and he left Nigel home alone for once. The house they lived in didn't have heat yet, so they used the fireplace to keep warm...Nigel started a fire in the fireplace while Jonathan was gone. It was a good fire...Nigel knew how to use it and what not to do, but Jon didn't want him to start one while he wasn't home." She took a sip of her tea and sighed.  
  
"What happened to him?" I looked at her and took a drink of coffee.  
  
"When Jonathan got home, he got mad at Nigel for starting a fire...he knocked him around a little bit...but the worst was when Nigel tried to fight back." She looked at me. "Jonathan grabbed the fire poker out of the coals and laid it across Nigel's back to teach him not to play with fire." His aunt held her hands about a foot apart. "He's got a scar about this long."  
  
I was in shock. "Oh my god...did he ever get Jonathan in trouble?"  
  
"No. He was too afraid to do anything...so he just let the burn heal on it's own without any medication or help...so it's darker than most scars." She shook her head. "A shame really..."  
  
"When did you find out about it?"  
  
"When Nigel came to visit with me in the summer and him and his cousin went swimming down in the pond a few miles down the road. I went to go take them lunch and I saw it...asked him about it later that night and he told me everything." She stood. "More coffee?"  
  
I shook my head. "I'm going to go walk around outside, if that's alright...?"  
  
"Sure thing! Just be careful, it's a bit muddy outside because of last night's rain." She smiled at me.  
  
"Okay." I stood up and headed up the stairs, changing into a pair of jeans and real shoes and putting my hair into a bun. As I walked down the stairs, I sighed to myself. I slipped out the front door and stood out on the porch. Yeah...muddy was right. Walking around the back of the house, I noticed that they had a barn or another building out back, and I decided to go check it out. I hiked up the slight hill and as I got closer, I realized that yes in fact it was a barn which held some sort of animal. The side door was open, so I walked in and heard the soft breathing of horses. Letting my eyes readjust to the light, I walked over to the stalls and saw two horses munching on hay. I sat and watched them for a moment, then decided that I would go back into the house and see if Janice needed help with anything.  
  
I walked outside and scanned the road from my higher vantage point, and I saw someone walking towards the house. Tall...black hair...wearing what Nigel had been wearing yesterday...quickly, I headed down the hill and onto the dirt road, being careful not to slip on the mud.  
  
~~Nigel~~ Pulling out the pack of cigarettes again, I lit another one and took a long drag off it as I walked. I looked up and saw Jordan standing on the road in front of the house. Coughing as the smoke tickled my throat, I took another deep breath as I walked, exhaling the smoke into the air. I stopped and finished the cigarette before I got any closer to the house and to Jordan.  
  
I walked up to her and looked her in the eyes.  
  
~~Jordan~~ He was smoking...something I'd never known him to do. When he looked at me, I saw straight into his mind. He was tired...he was cold...he had a headache and he was hurting so deep inside that I didn't know what to do. I tried to talk, but it didn't work...my voice wouldn't come. Swallowing hard, I felt the sting of tears behind my eyes because I couldn't help him.  
  
"Walk with me." He looked up the road. "Please...I can't do it alone."  
  
As we started to walk, past the house and continuing to head up the road, walking in silence. When we came to a heavier wooded area of the countryside, Nigel motioned for me to follow him off the road and down a small dirt path. I did, curious as to where we were going, but I was more concerned with Nigel's well being than where we were headed. After a while of walking through the trees, I couldn't stand it. "Nigel...where are we going?"  
  
"Here." Nigel stopped at a large boulder and climbed up it and sat down. "Sit."  
  
Climbing up the rock, I was surprised when I made it up without killing myself. "Alright."  
  
"Now...stay here for just a second." He got up, climbed down the rock, and walked over to another, much smaller rock. He leaned over and picked it up, then grabbed a stick and started digging in the soil. He dug about six inches down until he stopped and pulled something wrapped in plastic out of the ground. He carried it back to the rock , climbed back up next to me, and sat back down.  
  
"What's that?" I looked at it. A dirty piece of plastic.  
  
He pulled the plastic off of it and looked up at me. "Did she...tell you about this?"  
  
Looking down, I saw that it was a fire poker. I nodded. "Yeah...she did..." I looked up at him and saw tears forming in his eyes. "Nige...I...don't know what to say...to help you..."  
  
"Jordan...right now...I don't know what's going on inside of me...I feel like I should be crying...screaming...sleeping...I don't know what I need to do myself..." He lowered his head into his hands. "I just...don't know..."  
  
I leaned over and hugged him. As I held him, I smelled alcohol on his breath and smoke in his hair. "Nige...where'd you go last night?"  
  
"Tried to drink away the pain but only made it worse." He coughed weakly and pulled away from me. "Worse."  
  
I looked at him. His face was pale, his hair was wet and so were his jeans. His eyes were red from the smoke and the tears, and he looked like he hadn't slept in years. "Nigel...lets go back to the house...your aunt's pretty worried about you and you need to get some sleep."  
  
He nodded, and I helped him up and we headed back for the house.  
  
TBC...  
  
**A/N: thanks for reading...hope you like it...reviews are loved!** 


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35 of "Breaking Through"  
  
A/N: Right after 34  
  
********* Chapter 35 *********  
  
~~Jordan~~ As Nige and I walked back to the house, he didn't say a word. Didn't even look over at me even when I kept looking at him every few steps. Just walked. When we got there, he didn't go into the house but walked around to the back and up towards the barn. I followed him, trying to figure out what he was doing. He walked around to the back of the barn and motioned for me to stay put. So I did, and he walked a little farther before turning away from me and lighting another cigarette. I stood and watched as he smoked...not quite sure if I should try to get him to stop, or if I should just let him do what he wanted.  
  
He finished the cigarette, dropped it to the soft earth, and ground it in with his heel. Turning back to me, he sighed. "Lets go back."  
  
"Alright." I walked over to him and we went and walked back down to the house. I opened the door to the house for him and he walked straight past the kitchen where his aunt was washing the dishes and he headed for upstairs. "Nige..." I followed after him up the stairs. "Your aunt made both the beds in the upstairs room for us...I don't care if you're in there but I'll sleep on the couch if you want a room to yourself."  
  
"Nah. It's fine, Jordan." He walked into our room and looked around. "Where'd she put my stuff?"  
  
"In the closet." I walked over and grabbed his duffel bag and backpack. "Here."  
  
He took the bags from me, unzipped them, and started rifling through them looking for clean clothes.  
  
"Hey Nigel...you want anything from downstairs...tea or...anything to eat?" I headed for the door.  
  
"Not right now. I'm going to take a shower but I'll want something after I'm done." He grabbed some clothes and followed me to the doorway. "Okay?"  
  
"Okay." I smiled at him and headed down the stairs while he turned and headed down the hall for the bathroom. Walking down the stairs slowly, I was met by a curious look from Janice.  
  
"Is he..." She walked over and looked up the stairs.  
  
"He's alright. He just wanted to take a shower and then he'll be down for some tea and some breakfast." I smiled at her and went to sit down at the kitchen table.  
  
"Alright." She smiled, then when to put some water on to get hot. "Would you like some more coffee?" I nodded, so she filled me a cup and brought it over. "Here you are."  
  
"Thank you." I took the drink gratefully and sipped slowly at it. I heard the sound of running water from upstairs and then looked over towards the wall of pictures while I drank my coffee. Janice came and sat at the chair across from me at the table and sighed.  
  
"Is he really alright?" her voice interrupted my train of thought.  
  
I shrugged my shoulders. "I'm not quite sure...I mean, I think that he's hurting...a lot...and when we were talking earlier he told me that he doesn't know what to feel or what to think." I took a drink of my coffee then continued. "Which is a common sign in the first stages of the grief process." I smiled and then laughed to myself. "I'm starting to sound like Lily..."  
  
"Who's Lily?" His aunt looked up at me.  
  
"Oh, sorry. She's the in-morgue grief counselor at work." I thought to myself : 'I really need to call Garret and let him know that I'm not dead and how Nigel's doing...'  
  
She nodded. "That must be a rough job."  
  
"Yeah, but she's pretty good at it." I smiled, then stood up from the table. "Excuse me, I need to go call our boss and tell him what's going on...he made me promise."  
  
"No problem." She smiled at me, and I turned and headed up the stairs, making sure that I still heard water running from the shower. I slipped into the bedroom, grabbed my cell phone, and then headed back down stairs to go outside and make the call.  
  
Mumbling to myself, I cursed the man who invented that stupid "roaming" idea. Soon, after getting a signal, I dialed the number to the morgue and waited for it to connect me. As I heard it ringing, I sighed, and walked a bit down the road away from the house. The sound of Emmy's voice soon came on the line, and I had her connect me to Garret's office.  
  
---phone---  
  
"This is Doctor Macy."  
  
"Garret...It's Jordan." I kicked at a small pebble as I wandered.  
  
"Jordan...hey...how is everything?"  
  
I eyed a large wooden stump and walked over and sat on it. "Not so good."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I mean...his dad died...last night and he had his aunt take me back to the house while he went out and tried to drink his pain away. He came back this morning and he just looks...different."  
  
"How so?" Garret leaned back in his chair and tried to picture Nigel as she was describing him.  
  
"He's not himself. He's...like...empty..."I thought to myself, trying to figure out how to describe him to Garret without having him go into fits. "He just...seems weaker...lost..." I paused. "And when I saw him when he came back, he was walking up the road...and he was smoking. He's probably had 4 or 5 so far today...I can't be sure." I felt the sting of tears in my eyes. "Garret...I don't know what to do..."  
  
"Jordan...baby...just relax..." he could hear the anxiety in her voice as she spoke. "I don't know what to do either...but just let him do what he needs to do...be there for him. Speaking of that, where is he now?"  
  
"When I left the house to call you he was still in the shower." I looked back towards the house.  
  
"Is he eating?"  
  
"Not yet. But his aunt made him something for breakfast and before he got in the shower he told me he would eat when he was done."  
  
"Alright. Jordan...listen to me. Just be there for him. And tell him we're all here for him when he comes home. And call me if anything else happens, but call my cell. We just got a call to go work a highway accident and it looks pretty bad." he paused. "Okay?"  
  
"Okay Gar...love you."  
  
"Love you too Jordan." He hung up the phone as I pressed the end button on mine. I sat on the stump for a moment before glancing back at the house and standing.  
  
As I walked up the road, memories of my own mother's death flooded through my brain. I was only young, but I still knew what was going on and I was still sad and confused...hell, I still was even today. I walked up the steps to the house, wiped my shoes off, and walked through the door. The sound of water had stopped, and I saw that Nigel was sitting at the table and drinking tea.  
  
"Hey babe." I walked over to Nigel and gave him a quick hug as I sat down. "Feeling better?"  
  
"A little." He looked down at the table and then took another drink of his tea.  
  
"I called Garret...he says if you need anything you can call him...and he's not mad at us." I smiled at him. "So we're not going to be fired...we can have some time off..."  
  
Nigel looked up at me. "That's good."  
  
Janice walked over and sat at the table. "Nigel...I forgot to tell you, while you were in the shower, Bret called and said that he'd be over as soon as he could."  
  
I looked over at Nigel. "Who's Bret?"  
  
"My cousin. We hung out a lot when we were younger. We used to go down to the creek and go swim and stuff." He smiled at me. "I haven't talked to him in ages..." Nigel smiled. "We were such bad kids...always getting into trouble..." He looked at his aunt.  
  
"Yes you were! You two would always find something to do just to annoy me or the neighbors." She laughed.  
  
"You still have horses here? I didn't check when I went out to the barn earlier today." He looked at her.  
  
"Yes. Two. But they're not the same ones when you were here, obviously. They're both pretty well broken and we've got tack if you wanted to go out later...Jordan? Do you know how to ride?"  
  
I looked up at her and shook my head. "Not really...I did the pony rides when I went to the fair once with dad...but I never really was around horses." I smiled. "Although I'm sure if he wanted to...Nigel could teach me how..." Glancing over at him, I noticed that he was grinning. "...but I'm not sure if he's the safest option."  
  
"I swear. I'll be nice." Nigel laughed. "If I didn't Garret would have my head."  
  
"Alright." I smiled, and then looked over at Janice. "So...do you need any help in making arrangements or anything? I mean...I've never had to do this before but I kind of know what needs to happen..."  
  
She shook her head. "No, Jonathan had it all planned for in his will...we just need to notify a few of the people and get things moving. I'll do that later today." She smiled. "Thank you anyways."  
  
"No problem." I looked over at Nigel, who was staring back down at the table again. I was going to say something, but I got a feeling that he didn't want to have his aunt worry about him, so I didn't. I looked back at the wall with the pictures and sighed.  
  
~~Nigel~~ I stood from the table and grabbed my empty cup, walking over to the sink to wash it out. After I finished, I dried my hands and looked back at Jordan, who was looking at the wall, and my aunt, who was finishing her cup of tea. Feeling the need to get out of the house and be alone for a while, I walked past the table and told them that I was going to be out in the barn checking out the horses, all the while knowing that Jordan would soon be following me.  
  
Walking out the back door of the house, I noticed that the morning mist had burned off and given way to white cloudy skies. Kicking at the dirt as I walked the path to the barn, I shook my head. I was glad I was here, but I wasn't glad about -why- I was here. I entered through the side door of the barn, leaving it open to give light without having to turn the overhead lights on.  
  
As I entered, I walked over to the two stalls and looked at each of the two horses. I rested my arms on the edge of the wooden door of one of them and watched them as they stood. I attempted to figure out which of the two was nicer, so that if I was to let Jordan ride one of them I wouldn't get her hurt. After a while of looking at the horses, I turned to go outside to have another smoke, and noticed that Jordan was sitting behind me on the floor, leaning up against the wall and smiling.  
  
"I knew you would follow me." I smiled at her, and then walked over and sat next to her. "So you've never actually ridden?"  
  
"Not without the horse being attached to a pole and walking in a circle with dad standing right next to me the whole time." She smiled. "How'd you learn?"  
  
"Coming out here to my aunt's for the summer. Bret taught me...he took lessons at some fancy riding school on the other side of town." I nodded. "We would always try to race each other when my aunt wasn't out watching us...she had a thing about us letting the horses just run full tilt out here in the open." Grinning, I leaned over and whispered to Jordan. "Doesn't mean we never did it..."  
  
"Of course. Why would YOU ever follow the rules?" She laughed and stood up. "Weren't you going outside a minute ago?"  
  
I stood. "Yeah...but only to smoke..." Reaching down for my pocket, I pulled out the pack of cigarettes and the lighter. "So stay in here for a minute."  
  
"Nige...seriously..." She walked outside and dragged me with her. "...why? I've never seen you smoke before."  
  
I shrugged. "So?" I raised an eyebrow at her and waited for her to walk away so I could light it. "It's not like it matters anyways."  
  
She stared at me. "Nigel...we autopsy people who the only reason they're dead it from lung cancer. From smoking. Don't say it doesn't matter."  
  
"It doesn't for me." I spit at the ground and tapped the pack against my leg softly.  
  
"Yes it does. You all of a sudden just start smoking...yeah I know it's hard for you to deal with this but that's not the answer." Jordan looked up at me. "You're acting different...and it's scaring me."  
  
Sighing, I looked up at her. "What do you mean, different."  
  
"You're distant. And when I look you in the eyes something's...gone. And you're smoking. You never smoke." She looked up at me and then down at the lighter in my hand. "Why do you think you need to do this...there's different ways to deal."  
  
"Correction...I didn't use to smoke, at least not in the States. When I was here I did it for two or three years. I quit when I went to Boston because it lowered my insurance." I paused. "And I'm distant because I'm confused. I'm lost. I don't know what to do with myself." Looking at Jordan, I shrugged. "So I would rather smoke than have to deal with the pain and stress that my body's screaming at me alright?"  
  
"Fine." She looked up at me angrily. "Then do it right here." With her toe, she drew an "x" in the dirt. "I'm staying here."  
  
"Jordan...you don't need to be getting all the secondhand -" I started to talk but she cut me off.  
  
"No. I don't. But I'm going to stand right here until you smoke that cigarette because I'm not letting you 'deal' by yourself. I want to help." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Go. Do it."  
  
"Jordan..." I looked at her, confused. "...just go...please..." When she shook her head, I felt a twinge of anger rising inside of me. I didn't want to get mad at her...but she was pushing it. "Please..."  
  
"I came all the way over here with you and I'm sure as hell not leaving now." Jordan glared at me. "Smoke it or get rid of them." When I didn't move, she held out her hand. "What's it going to be?"  
  
Standing there, unmoving, I began remembering how hard it was for me to quit in the first place when I moved. The withdrawls...the cravings...the anger and all that went along with it. Breathing deeply and slowly, I shut my eyes and gritted my teeth as I knew she was still standing there with her hand extended. Part of me was telling me to throw them away....give them to her...but the other part was telling me to light up right in front of her just to spite her. I heard her trying to get my attention, but I ignored her and my eyes remained closed. Opening my eyes, I turned around and faced the other direction, still not lighting the cigarette but continuing to contemplate it.  
  
As I stood, my back turned to her, I could only imagine what she was thinking or doing...or the look on her face. My mind wandered as I stood, breathing heavily and running my finger over the lighter in pocket as I thought.  
  
"Nigel!" Jordan yelled my name, touched my back, and snapped me back into reality. She touched right on top of the darkened brand I had on my skin...burned deep and embedded in my memory forever. I spun around and glared at her, my eyes fierce and dark with anger.  
  
"Don't...you...ever..." I hissed my words out at her, my voice laced with hatred.  
  
She jumped back in shock. "Nigel...what..."  
  
"You know what you did." I snarled at her. "You meant to do it. Just to throw me over the edge." Taking a step towards her I sighed heavily. "You just wanted to see how I would react didn't you. Wait for a chance to get me worked up and then BAM!" I yelled and threw my hands in the air. "You get what you want don't you?!" My voice rose as my temper flared. "You get to see me being the person that you knew...existed..." I was mad, and my mind and body were being sent into overdrive with the adrenaline that was coursing through my veins like wildfire.  
  
"Nige...I don't..." Jordan took a step back from me, her eyes wide with fear. "Please...Nigel...listen to me..."  
  
"Why?! So I can hear you tell me how I'm a failure?! How I'm hurting myself?! How you won't leave me alone?!" I shoved the cigarettes and lighter back into my pocket angrily, then clenched my fists tightly at my sides. "You don't know what I've had to go through! You don't know anything!"  
  
"Tell me then!" Jordan yelled back at me.  
  
I stopped short for a minute, stunned by the fact that she yelled at me, but angry that she would have the audacity to do so. "Fine!" I yelled angrily. "You don't know what its like to live being the kid that your father told you that he never wanted! You didn't have to watch your mom get sick, slowly waste away to nothing! You didn't have to deal with constant taunting and abuse! YOU didn't get a red hot fire poker laid across your back, scarring you for life! You didn't have to hide it in fear that if you told anyone you'd be beaten! You didn't get kicked leave your house at nineteen, join the army, and then get kicked out because you fought back when some bastard tried to kick your ass! You didn't have to leave everything you knew, everyone you loved, everything behind and move to start over!" I felt the sting of angry tears in my eyes as I yelled. "You...don't...EVEN know!!" I glared angrily at her and breathed hard, tears running down my face and my throat raw from the pain of yelling.  
  
"Nigel...MY mother was murdered when I was young too...and I still don't know who killed her. I tried to go to medical school but when I saw a doctor make a mistake and somebody ended up dead...you weren't sworn to secrecy! You didn't take a dose of pills and alcohol and get rushed to the ER to get barely brought back to life! You don't have a problem where you hate commitment and you run whenever you can't deal anymore!" Jordan screamed at me.  
  
Shoving up the left arm of my shirt, I snarled. "You didn't do THIS after you got out of the shower this morning because you didn't want to deal anymore!" There were several long slashes across my upper arm that were an angry red, swollen and bruised. "You didn't get shot because you were trying to get some slimy bastard off the streets! I almost died too! Twice!" I took one step towards her and looked her straight the eyes. "You didn't have to reconnect with the father you never knew, only to find out that he was dying. You don't have to bury your DAD." I swallowed hard and then took a few steps away from her. "You DON'T know."  
  
"You're right. I don't." Jordan folded her arms across her chest and stared at me. "And to be honest with you, I think you need to get over yourself." She turned and walked away from me as I glared at her back.  
  
"Piss off!" I yelled as she walked away. Reaching into my pockets, I pulled the lighter and cigarettes out. I looked at them for a second before throwing them towards her retreating figure. "And you can have these!" Turning on my heel, I walked in the other direction and went behind the barn where I promptly kicked at the wooden wall before sitting down. "Bitch." I snarled to myself as leaned against the rough wood, letting my head hit before resting it against the wall.  
  
~~Jordan~~ As I walked away from the barn angrily, I saw a car pull into the drive and a man, woman, and two small children got out. The man looked up and noticed that I was walking down the hill, then sent the woman and children inside with Nigel's aunt who had come out to greet them. He was tall, lanky, with a head full of short reddish hair. I walked up to him, and he smiled at me.  
  
"Hello...I'm Bret...Nigel's cousin...you must be Nigel's friend Jordan." He hugged me before he noticed that I had been crying. "What's wrong?"  
  
I waved my hand back up at the barn. "Nigel and I...just got into a fight...he's pretty pissed off so I just said screw it and left him up there to relax." Turning my head, I glared back up at the barn. "I know he's just angry but I don't want to deal with it."  
  
"I understand." Bret nodded. "Why don't you go inside...I'm sure Janice could fix you something for lunch while she's making my family something...I'll go talk to him." He looked up towards the barn. "He...didn't hurt you did he?"  
  
"No. I don't even know what I did to set him off really...I just tried to get his attention and he freaked out on me...we were fighting over the fact that he was smoking when he never did when he was back in the States." I shrugged. "Wife and kids?" I smiled at him.  
  
"Yeah. My wife's name is Carolyn and my son's name is Andrew...and our baby girl's name is Elizabeth." He smiled at me. "Go on...I'll talk to him, don't worry."  
  
"Alright." I turned and took one look at the barn before I walked towards the house.  
  
Bret sighed and walked up the hill towards the barn slowly.  
  
TBC.... 


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36 of "Breaking Through"  
  
A/N: Right after 35. ((Disclaimer: none of them are mine except Bret and his family...I made them up myself.)) ********* Chapter 36 *********  
  
~~Nigel~~ As I calmed down, I sank my head into my hands and sighed deeply. My breath was coming shakily and ragged, and the pain of the slashes I'd made in my arm was getting to where I could feel them throbbing in anger as blood coursed through my veins. I had a headache from yelling, my voice was raw, and I had a terrible feeling of guilt in the pit of my stomach as I realized what I had screamed at Jordan.  
  
~~Bret~~ I walked up the beaten dirt path to the barn, and slowly looked around as I did so. When I didn't see Nigel anywhere, I figured he was either in the barn or around back. As I walked to the back, I stopped when I saw a pack of cigarettes lying on the ground, a lighter a few feet from them. I picked them up and continued walking. I rounded the corner of the barn and stopped when I saw Nigel, head bowed. He looked like hell, just from what I could see.  
  
Standing in silence, I just stared at him for a few moments before clearing my throat to get his attention.  
  
~~Nigel~~ Turning my head, it took me a minute to realize just who was standing there. I didn't bother standing - didn't really need to, he came to me - but I merely looked him in the eyes and nodded. Bret sat on the ground next to me and stared straight ahead before handing me the pack of cigarettes and the lighter. I took them from him and set them on the ground as I looked at him. "Hey."  
  
"Hey." Bret smiled weakly at me. "You alright?" He reached over and placed his hand on my knee.  
  
"No. I'm not." I leaned my head against the wall of the barn and shut my eyes. "I just screwed myself over."  
  
"She understands..."  
  
"She what?" I looked over at him. "How would you..."  
  
"I met her when she was coming down the hill to the house. She told me that she made you mad and you two fought...she doesn't know what she did though." He glanced at me. "What'd she do?"  
  
"Nothing really..." I racked my brain back through my outburst to figure out what she had done. And then I shivered and winced. "Wait...she touched it." I nodded. "She yelled my name to get my attention and touched it." Grabbing at the pack of cigarettes, I pulled one out and lit it, drawing it to my lips and inhaling. I held my breath for a minute before blowing a stream of smoke into the air. "That's all it took."  
  
"Does she know?" Bret took the lighter from my hand, pulled his own pack of smokes out, and lit it.  
  
"Yeah...she knows about what happened but she doesn't know not to touch it." I took another drag off the cigarette. "Don't know why it bugged me though...dozens of people have touched it and it hasn't set me off like it used to..."  
  
He thought for a moment. "Maybe it was because she yelled your name."  
  
"Probably." I finished the cigarette and threw the remnants on the ground.  
  
"Nigel...listen...I know that you're mad at her but she's honestly scared that she hurt you." Bret looked over at me. "You have to tell her."  
  
I shook my head. "Not yet. It's...not the right time yet." I looked over at him, and a slight smiled played at my lips. "Have you been riding lately, Mr. Williamson?"  
  
He grinned. "Why...no I haven't...I don't keep horses at my property right now..." Bret stood and helped me stand up as he finished his cigarette. "Mr. Townsend?"  
  
I laughed at him. "It's DOCTOR Townsend to you, mate." We headed inside the barn and grabbed the tack for the horses off the wall.  
  
"English or Western?" Bret looked at both saddles. "Loser's choice."  
  
Raising an eyebrow, I grabbed a western saddle off the wall. "I've always ridden western Bret...you should know that...and I'm not a loser." Walking to the what I had chosen earlier as the horse that I would ride if Jordan and I went out, I nodded. "I want this one."  
  
"Fine by me." Bret grabbed the other Western saddle off the wall. "You know...if we get caught racing..." he winked at me mischievously.  
  
"What can she do? We're grown men." I threw my saddle onto the horse's back and smiled. "Let her try and give us a switching."  
  
"Right." Bret saddled up his horse, then placed the bridle and reins on. "So same rules as always?"  
  
I slipped the bridle and reins onto my horse and nodded. "Down from the far end of the pasture, then turn and come back up the road. First one past the mailbox wins." I laughed and tied my horse to the rail as I went to open the main door to the barn. I pushed the door upwards and coughed as a flurry of dust rained down on me. Glancing down at the house, I noticed that the curtains into the kitchen were open and I could see everyone gathered around the table. "Hey...Bret-"  
  
"Yeah?" He had his horse by the reins and had mine in his other hand. He walked both of them to the main door of the barn and looked where I was looking. As we stood there looking down at the house, I saw Jordan turn and look out the window at us before turning back to the group at the table.  
  
"I think we've got a problem..." I grinned and took the reins from him.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I glanced up at the table and saw Nigel and Bret standing at the main door to the barn, Bret holding two horses. Smiling, I turned to Janice and motioned to the boys. "Are they supposed to be doing that?" I winked at her.  
  
She turned and saw Bret hand Nigel a pair of reins. Standing, she shook her head. "If those boys even try to pull that stunt one more time..." Wiping her hands on her apron, she walked towards the back door. Carolyn and I followed, the children staying on the couch and watching TV.  
  
We walked out the back door and into the warm midday sun and I had to stop from laughing at the way Janice was glaring at them.  
  
~~Nigel~~ Ignoring the glare from our aunt, I held Bret's horse still as he climbed up onto him, him then in turn doing the same for me. I looked over at Bret and smiled. "I think we need to run the big one if they're all watching...what do you think?" I led the horse out into the sun and turned for the far end of the pasture.  
  
"I concur." Bret followed me, as we had the horses go slowly to avoid being found out too quickly, even though we knew that she knew what we were planning. We were farther away from the house when we sent them into a slow trot to warm up their legs.  
  
"Boys!!!" Janice yelled after us. "Don't you even!!!"  
  
Wagging my eyebrows at Bret, I motioned with my head. "There right?" I was nodding towards a large boulder, which we would always officially start our races at. Trot past that, turn around, trot up to it, and once you were past it was full out from there.  
  
"Yeah. And head for the far side of the pasture, turn, head for the road, then turn at the road and go for the mailbox." He smiled at me. "She's going to kill us."  
  
We both turned around and faced the boulder, pulling our horses to a stop. "I know. But why live if you don't live dangerously?" I winked at him and then nudged my horse into a trot.  
  
He caught up to me and we both eyed each other and then the boulder which was slowly approaching.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I laughed out loud and covered my face as Janice huffed in anger.  
  
"Those boy's don't realize that racing those horses is dangerous...especially on the road." She looked at me and shook her head.  
  
"It looks like they're racing through the field." I saw no indication of them racing on the road.  
  
"Believe me, love, they'll get there." She turned and watched as they neared the boulder. "Oh well..."  
  
~~Nigel~~ As soon as my horse's nose had passed the stone marker, I kicked him in the ribs and sent him into a gallop, throwing a glance to my side where Bret was keeping an even pace with me. It took a few seconds to get up to top speed, but soon we were thundering through the soft dirt and sending clumps of mud flying behind us. As we neared the first turn, I realized that I was on the outside of the turn and Bret could make up time by cutting me off.  
  
Jerking the reins to the right and nudging the horse to go faster, I swerved in front of him and took the inside as he had to catch up on the outside. Laughing as I heard him curse at me in Gaelic, I didn't even look back as I forced the horse into the turn. The horse nearly lost his footing in the soft earth, but he merely double stepped and went wide in the turn. As Bret blazed past me, I growled and lowered my head closer to the horses neck as we headed for the road and the more important turn.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I gasped when Nigel's horse almost fell, and I heard Janice mutter a prayer when he didn't. I felt her hand on my arm and she motioned for us to walk around the to the front of the house.  
  
"Come...we don't want to miss the finish now do we?" We walked around the house and stood on the porch, directly even with the mailbox.  
  
I looked down the road and saw the horses flying down the hill, about to make the turn on the road. My eyes caught the outline of a fence in their path and I gasped. "The fence!"  
  
Janice turned and looked. "Bloody Hell. The city put that in a few years ago...neither of them know about it..." She turned her attention to the horses. "And they'll be too stupid to notice."  
  
~~Nigel~~ As I caught up to Bret slowly, I noticed that same fence that Jordan was currently noticing a half mile down the road. "Bret!" I called out. "The fence!"  
  
Bret turned back to look at me but then whipped his head forwards. There was no way he could stop in time, so there was only one option. "Go over it!"  
  
I swallowed hard and leaned into the form that Bret had tried to teach me on countless occasions. I'd never actually jumped a rail before and managed to hold onto the horse. I was following behind him and I knew that if I tried to slow down that the horse wouldn't be able to do it, so I nudged him in the ribs and tried to pick up the pace.  
  
~~Jordan~~ I looked at them as they continued to ride at the fence. "They're not going to stop are they."  
  
Janice shook her head. "Bret knows how to jump rails and fences." She looked over at me. "Nigel doesn't ride in Boston does he?"  
  
"Not that I've ever known." Stepping back to be next to her I kept my eyes on them while speaking. "Nigel...does he know how to jump?"  
  
"No. He never could learn. Bret was teaching him all the time...Nigel would come back in the house all beat up and bruised. He couldn't land the jump." She looked at the boys. "I hope he learns quick."  
  
~~Bret~~ As I rapidly approached the fence, I made sure that the horse saw it and knew how high it was. I raised myself up and took a breath, praying that the horse wouldn't falter and throw me. When I cleared the fence, the horse hit the soft dirt of the road and nearly fell in the mud before I turned him and got out of the way for Nigel. "Please...let him hang on..." I watched as Nigel's horse took a soaring leap and headed for the ground, I noticed that Nigel's form was still as horrible as it always had been , so I slowed and got ready to pick him up off the ground.  
  
~~Nigel~~ As the hooves hit the slick mud, I felt my body lurch forwards, but I dug my heels into the stirrups and held my body to the horse's back, and I stayed put. Turning the horse, I grinned at Bret and nudged him back into a gallop, heading full tilt for the mailbox.  
  
Bret let out a yell and sent his horse into a gallop as well. "I never thought you would land that!" He yelled over the sound of the wind rushing through my ears.  
  
"Neither did I!" I yelled back before urging my horse faster. Bret edged slightly ahead and thundered through a water puddle, sending spray back into my face. "Not fair!"  
  
"Nothing's fair!"  
  
I leaned down and let the horse take full control, praying that we would reach the mailbox tied or leading. As we came near the house, I noticed that Jordan and the others were gathered on the porch. We rode hard, but when it came down to it, his horse was leading mine as we flew past the mailbox. Bret turned and grinned at me as he won, raising a fist in the air.  
  
I shook my head but quickly noticed that there was a huge puddle in the middle of the road and I knew that the horses wouldn't go through it. Pulling hard on my reins, I tried to get my horse to stop before he got scared. Bret looked at me quizzically before turning and seeing the puddle in front of him. As my horse came to a stop.  
  
The glint of the sun on the water caused his horse to get scared, stop short and turn, causing Bret to lose his balance and fall off the side of the saddle and hit the soft ground with a thud. As soon as Bret was on the ground, the horse took off running up the road. I took one look at Bret who was lying on the ground and nudged my horse around the puddle before heading after his horse.  
  
After I had caught it, I rode back to the house and tied both horses to the porch rail securely before heading into the house to see how Bret was. As I pulled the door closed behind me, I heard voices and laughter coming from the kitchen. I walked into the room and saw Bret sitting at the table with an bag of ice on his arm and a glass of whiskey in front of him, while Jordan, Carolyn, and my aunt were busy cooking something at the stove.  
  
"Bret...you okay mate?" I looked over at him as I sat down at the table in the chair across from him.  
  
"Yeah...just scratched up my arm and threw out my shoulder." He looked at me. "But I still won...and I can't believe you cleared that fence! You want a drink?" he pushed the whiskey bottle towards me.  
  
"Nah...not right now...I was actually going to see if Jordan maybe wanted to go out and ride since you're a little incapable." I smiled at him.  
  
He lowered his voice. "You have to tell her."  
  
"I know."  
  
TBC.... 


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37 of "Breaking Through"  
  
A/N: Takes place after 36.  
  
**Chapter 37**  
  
~~Nigel~~ Glancing over at Jordan, who was standing next to Carolyn and Janice, I smiled at Bret and stood up. Walking over behind he, I tapped her on the shoulder to get her attention. "Never thought I would see you so interesting in cooking."  
  
She turned and smiled. "Never thought I'd see you play cowboy either."  
  
"Alright, you win." I raised my hands in mock defeat. "Seriously though...can we go talk?" I lowered my voice. "There's some things you need to know."  
  
Jordan nodded. "Sure. I think I can leave..."  
  
"Go ahead honey, we've got in under control in here." Janice smiled at Jordan. "Just don't let him talk you into anything..." she paused. "I'll get you later for racing, young man."  
  
"Not if you can't catch me!" I smiled and headed for the door to the front of the house, Jordan follwing behind. "We'll be back in a little bit." We headed outside into the midday sun, the clouds burned off and no trace of the previous evening's storm to be found in the sky. Jordan didn't say a word, but merely smiled as I led the way to where I'd left the horses tied. "You up to this? I mean...if you're afraid or anything..."  
  
"As long as there isn't a reenactment of this morning, I'll be fine." She laughed and gently pet the horse on the nose. "This one for me?" she said, motioning to the one Bret had been riding.  
  
I nodded. "Yeah. He's the nicer of the two...and Bret falling was his own fault." I walked over at stood next to her. "Here. Climb up on the rail, then it will be easier to get on his back. I'll adjust your stirrups and everything to make sure you're in there snug."  
  
~~Jordan~~ Nodding, I climbed up on the rail and then awkwardly got onto the horse with Nigel's assistance. I sat nervously on top while Nigel adjusted the stirrups and made sure that the saddle was on tight enough. He untied my horse from the rail and handed me the reins as he walked the horse slowly away from the house. In the meantime, I perched on top of the animal and attempted to keep my balance.  
  
"Now, keep the reins loose, or the horse will think you're trying to get him to stop. Put one hand on the horn and the reins in the other. Move the reins in the direction you want the horse to go...and you don't have to pull very hard, they've very responsive. Try it." He smiled. "To make them go, just tell him to go or give him a very gentle nudge with your heels. To slow down, just pull back on the reins, and to stop, just keep pulling until they do."  
  
"Alright...sounds easy enough..." I gently nudged the horse to go as Nigel kept one hand on the reins and led me in a small circle around the dirt that was on the side of the house. This wasn't really that hard, it was just a matter of balancing right. "This okay?" I looked down at Nigel who nodded and gently released the reins from his grasp.  
  
"Try walking over to the other side of the road and back." He walked over and untied his horse from the porch. "Slowly."  
  
I nodded and made the horse walk to the other side of the road, and after a short trampling of a dead bush, we were back at the front of the house were Nigel was waiting, already ready to go. "Perfect."  
  
"Beginner's luck." I smiled at him and he laughed as he gently eased his horse onto the road. "Don't get too far ahead of me..."  
  
"I'm not going to. You have to catch up." He winked at me and slowed his horse down until we were riding next to each other. "Good job."  
  
"Oh shut up." I laughed at him. "Where are we going anyways?"  
  
"No where in particular...I'm hoping for a tree or two out in the middle some grass so we can sit and talk..." He looked over at me. "Jordan...you know I'd never try to..."  
  
"Nige, don't even finish that sentence." I looked at him. "I trust you."  
  
~~Nigel~~ I nodded and smiled at her. "Good." We continued to ride, slowly up the road, until we reached exactly what I had been looking for. A small patch of trees. Turning the horse off the road, I turned and looked at Jordan, who was obviously curious about what I was needing to talk to her about. Once I found a tree that would be good to tie the horses to, I stopped, dismounted, and secured my horse to the tree before moving and helping Jordan do the same.  
  
"Thanks." She smiled and looked around. "So we're in need of a tree to sit under?" Jordan walked over to a large tree. "This one looks good" she said as she sat down.  
  
Nodding, I came and sat next to her and stared out into space for a minute before looking over at her. "Jordan."  
  
"Yes Nige?" She looked at me.  
  
"I...I'm sorry...for everything..." I stammered out. "I'm an ass. I shouldn't have ever dragged you over here in the first place, because all it's causing us to do is fight. And I made you mad, and I said stuff that I wouldn't have ever said if I wasn't under so much stress...and I..."  
  
"Nigel...tell me how you feel. Please." Jordan looked over at me and placed a hand on my knee.  
  
"I...don't know...it's a roller coaster. One minute I feel fine, the next minute..." I dropped my head to avoid her gaze. "I'm lost...I have no idea what I'm supposed to do next. Confused...grief that I don't know how it's supposed to be..." I paused before lowering my voice. "I wish I was dead."  
  
"Don't you ever wish you were dead. Ever." Jordan looked at me and pulled my head so I was looking into her eyes. "You talk to me." She moved her attention to the sleeve of my shirt. "Let me see them." At my nod, she reached over and pulled up the sleeve of my shirt. "Jesus Nige..."  
  
The five slashes were thin, but long and deep. Deep enough where stitches wouldn't be needed, but enough that they'd bleed. "It hurts Jordan."  
  
Jordan was about to say that they had to hurt, but she stopped. "What hurts."  
  
"Me."  
  
"Alright." She pulled the sleeve of my shirt down. "Tell me."  
  
"Why...after we finally got to reconnect...He had to take him away..." I fumed at God in my head. "Why couldn't he have died when we hated each other?! Why make me love him and then rip him away?! Why?!" I yelled out loud. "What in the hell were you thinking?! I thought you were supposed to be nice to people!!!" Leaning my head against the tree I sighed loudly. "And then with you. I drag you out here with me and I'm an ass. I yelled at you just because you -" Suddenly, I stopped and looked over at Jordan and noticed the tears in her eyes.  
  
"Why...Nigel...what did I do wrong..." She bit her lip and swallowed. "Tell me..."  
  
"It's so fucking stupid." I shook my head. "It's not your fault...I just freaked out because when you yelled my name, you touched the scar...and I don't know what snapped in my head but I just got scared and fought back...I'm sorry..." I looked over at her. "Don't cry...please..."  
  
She shook her head. "I didn't know..."  
  
"I know, it's not your fault...babe...please...it's me...I just snapped. I shouldn't do that to you. To anyone." I felt the sting of tears in my eyes again. "Ever."  
  
"It's not your fault either...you've got every reason to be scared..." She shut her eyes and sighed. "I'm just glad you aren't mad at me...I thought it was something that I meant to do..."  
  
"Never." Looking over at her, I read the emotions across her face. I coughed, then breathed in deeply before speaking. "Jordan, I love you."  
  
"I know that Nige." She looked over at me.  
  
"I'm sorry..." the tears welled up in my eyes as I got emotional again. "...so...sorry..." I managed to hold myself together until she pulled my head to her chest in a hug. "...you didn't deserve any of this...I just threw it all at you...and you just let it hit you..." my voice became full of panic as I began to list dozens of reasons why Jordan should hate me and leave me to die.  
  
She let me name them all without a single word on her part, and she hugged me tightly the entire time and gently stroked my hair as I finally broke down and let the tears come after two days of holding them inside my chest. I have no idea how long I cried in her arms, but she held me the entire time until my sobs subsided.  
  
"Nige?" She leaned over and planted a soft kiss on my cheek. "I'm here...I'll be here as long as you need me..."  
  
I merely nodded and shivered as I felt the rays of the sun slowly fade. Opening one eye, I looked at her. "We should probably head back." The sun was slowly setting and the sky was growing darker. "Everyone probably thinks I ran off and kidnapped you." I slowly stood and helped her to her feet.  
  
"Hopefully they didn't send out the National Guard..." She looked up at me. "...or...whatever the British equivalent is."  
  
"Bret knows we needed to talk." I helped Jordan climb onto her horse before untying hers and climbing on mine. "So we should be alright." Smiling at her, I led the way back towards the house and we made small talk as we rode home. We placed the horses in the barn and fed them dinner before heading down the hill towards the house were our own dinner awaited us.  
  
As we ate dinner, we discussed the general stuff that a family would discuss around the dinner table...mainly the trip that Bret and family had to take to get here, if Jordan had liked riding a horse, how we were all feeling - general stuff.  
  
After dinner and after I had stifled back several yawns, Jordan suggested that I go up and get some sleep. I wasn't one to argue with that idea. As I slowly climbed the stairs to the bedroom, I went in the bathroom and took a look at my arm. I was standing and staring at it when Jordan knocked on the partially open door softly.  
  
"Nige?"  
  
I pushed the door open all the way. "Yeah?"  
  
She motioned to my arm. "You need help wrapping that up?"  
  
I nodded. "Yeah."  
  
"Alright." She closed the lid on the toilet and motioned for me to sit. "I'll get it." She reached around in the cabinets until she found some hydrogen peroxide, Neosporin, bandages, and a washcloth. "This is probably gonna sting a bit..."  
  
I noticed that her hand was shaking as she reached to dab at my arm with the peroxide. "Jordan...wait..."  
  
"What?" She looked up at me.  
  
"You don't have to be afraid." I reached out and touched her arm. "I promise. I won't...hurt you..."  
  
Jordan nodded. "I know." She smiled at me and then swabbed the peroxide over my skin quickly before applying the antibiotic cream and wrapping and bandage around it. "There. Done." She put the things back in the cabinet, then looked at me. "I'm going to go back downstairs for a bit...go ahead and go change into something more comfortable and get some rest. You...still don't mind me in there with you do you?"  
  
"No." I looked at her. "I'm fine with it."  
  
"Alright." I stood and walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, grabbing a pair of sweatpants and a plain white t-shirt out of my bag. Normally I would sleep shirtless, but...not when someone else was sharing the room with me. Being careful not to upset my fresh bandages, I changed and slowly climbed into bed, noticing that Jordan had taken the twin bed and left the larger queen sized bed for me.  
  
I tried to sleep, but mind was racing with everything that had gone on, so I merely laid awake and stared at the wall away from the door. I heard Jordan enter and rummage quietly through her bag, then walk down the hall and change in the bathroom before walking back into the darkened room. The only light came in through the window, and I slowly shifted and rolled over to look at her.  
  
She was looking at me while sitting on the edge of her bed.  
  
When I smiled softly at her, I shrugged. "Can't sleep." I whispered to her.  
  
"Why?" She pulled her feet up onto her bed and wrapped the comforter around her shoulders.  
  
"I..." I thought for a minute to myself before continuing. "I'm on edge."  
  
Jordan nodded. "I'm right here."  
  
Thankful for the lack of light in the room, I turned away from her and felt a few hot tears slide down my cheek. Pulling the blanket up around my neck, I nodded. "I know."  
  
"Nige...what's wrong..." I heard her stand up and cross the room to my bed. She reached down and placed a hand on my shoulder softly. "Tell me what's wrong...please...I want to help..."  
  
"I've never felt so alone in my life, even with you right here." I stared blankly at the wall in front of my eyes and let the tears silently stream down my face.  
  
She didn't say a word, but only sat down on the bed next to me and gently rubbed my arm. When I scooted closer to the wall, she laid down next to me and continued to rub my arm while whispering gently in my ear, telling me to let go. She began to rub my shoulder blades and my back, yet this time I didn't even flinch as she ran her fingers across the scar, but she did.  
  
"Nige...I didn't..."  
  
"It's alright Jordan...I'm fine..." I sniffed back the last of my tears as she pulled her comforter over her body.  
  
"Alright. Now...go to sleep...I'm here...you're not alone." She softly drew circles on the back of my neck until I nodded and slipped into the state of sleep that I had been chasing for the past hours and days.  
  
TBC.... 


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38 of "Breaking Through"  
  
A/N: The day after chapter 37.  
  
Chapter 38  
  
--Nigel--

I awoke to the smell of coffee drifting up into the bedroom, and I slowly opened one eye and blinked as the light from the window was bright even for an overcast London sky. Jordan wasn't next to me anymore, but then again, I wasn't sure if she'd actually ever been next to me - it could have been all a part of a dream. I rolled onto my back and stared at the ceiling as I listened to the sounds of breakfast and activity downstairs, and the sounds of someone in the shower in the bathroom down the hall. Breathing deeply, I stretched and absently minded scratched my chest as I heard the water squeak off in the shower. I wasn't even sure of the date, the time, or the fact that I was even conscious at the moment. All that was known was the fact that I was in a bed, presumably in my aunt's house, and I was here because my father had passed away after a quick battle of cancer. After we'd reconnected, and after I finally realized why he had done what he'd done.  
  
I sat up against the headboard on the bed and pulled the comforter up to my waist as I stared at the end of the bed and the door to the room blankly. No real urge was present in my head to go downstairs, because I didn't really want to talk to anybody before I'd had a chance to talk to myself and the demons that were running rampantly through my head. Fighting off the urge to scour the pockets of my jeans for a cigarette and the lighter, I merely bit the tip of my tongue to keep my mind off the craving that was coursing angrily through my veins. Upon hearing the sound of footsteps, I turned my attention to the door, expecting it to open, but whoever it was continued down the hall and down the flight of stairs to the kitchen. Many years and days spent in the house told me that there was no one remaining upstairs - my ear had been trained to listen for footsteps on several strategic floorboards which Bret and I were certain were put where they had been put for a reason.  
  
Standing slowly, I walked to the end of the bed and reached for my bag, determined to find something to wear that was comfortable and casual, yet still clean. I decided on a pair of loose fitting jeans and a t-shirt. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I put on fresh socks, pulled on the clean jeans, and removed the white shirt I'd worn to sleep in. I caught sight of myself in the full length mirror on the other side of the room, and upon seeing that I looked like hell from far away, I stood back up and walked to the mirror. As I ran my eyes over the bare skin of my chest and ribs, I couldn't help but notice the dark circles which plagued my eyes and the fact that I was looking quite horrible at the moment. Lowering my head away from the vision in front of me, I neglected to see Jordan walk quietly into the room as I shut my eyes.  
  
--Jordan--

Peeking my head in the doorway, I didn't see Nigel in bed, but I soon saw him across the room standing in front of the mirror with his head lowered. Not wanting to startle him, I stood quietly in the doorway and looked away for a moment before I was drawn again to the bare skin that covered his back. And it was in plain view. I couldn't help but look at it...the color, the way that the skin had attempted to heal itself over the burn. It was like a brand that one would put on cattle...burned straight into the skin and left to heal over as a scar. A deep, permanent scar, only this one was on Nigel's back and my brain continued to tell me that there was something horribly wrong with that fact.  
  
He still didn't know I was in the room, and I could only notice that he had began to shake ever so slightly as he stood in front of the mirror. It wasn't the shake that comes when you cry, it wasn't the shake that comes when you're scared, it wasn't the shake that comes when you drink three double-shot espressos in a three hour time period. It was the shake that comes when you're utterly exhausted and unable to go on with any form of conscious thought or actions. I paused for a moment before walking over to his side and gently placing a hand on his back. "Nige..." I whispered. "It's alright...you need to lie down...please..."  
  
--Nigel--

For some reason, when Jordan showed up out of nowhere and touched me, I didn't even flinch. I was so numb to all feelings...to pain, touch...even the feel of her hand on my skin didn't register in my brain as someone that cared about me laying a hand on me. It was just something that was there. Her voice seemed far away, almost like it was underwater and unreachable no matter how long I could hold my breath and dive beneath the turmoil of the waves that were crashing in my head. As I turned to head back for my bed, I felt my knees go slightly weak, and for a split second I lost consciousness. Jordan grabbed hold of my body and kept me from tripping, but she guided me over to the bed and I quickly crumpled into a heap on the surface.  
  
"Nige...I'm gonna go get Bret...you need some help." She turned and started for the doorway before I stopped her.  
  
"Jordan - don't." I sat up and stared at her blankly. "Don't. I'm alright...I just got...a little lightheaded." Smiling weakly, I attempted to play off my pain and weakness. "Honest."  
  
"When was the last time you ate?" She walked back over to me and placed a hand on my forehead. "Possibly a slight fever..."  
  
"Last night. But I wouldn't really call it eating...so I would be pressed to say when I had lunch back in Boston the day we flew out." Shrugging, I knew that she'd probably flip out. "I just haven't been hungry enough to eat anything...so I don't." Eager to change the subject, I looked up at her. "So has my aunt told you anything about the plans for the funeral or anything?"  
  
Jordan raised an eyebrow at me - she wasn't wanting to let me off that easily. "Yeah...the service...it's tomorrow at some church on the east side - I guess your dad had a plot set up and the plans all made for the whole thing. He didn't want you to have to deal with anything."  
  
I nodded before looking down and realizing that I still was missing a shirt.  
  
"You get dressed...or do you need my help? I can go get you some breakfast ready if you'd like me to." Jordan read the look on my face like she always had been able to. "What?" She whispered softly.  
  
"I'll be alright." Slowly, I pulled myself to my feet and nodded. "If you could just get me something ready, I'll be down in a minute to eat." I reached to the end of the bed and grabbed the t-shirt I'd selected earlier as she headed out of the room with a nod. I slipped it over my head, and when I was certain she was downstairs, I grabbed the pack of cigarettes and lighter from my jeans which were in a crumpled heap on the floor. As I removed one, I walked to the window and pushed it open as I lit up and took a long drag off of it. "After I do this." I muttered to myself quietly as I stared out the window and smoked.  
  
--Jordan--

Heading downstairs, I entered the kitchen, intent on finding something that Nigel would eat without me having to force feed him like a child. Bret noticed that I had a concerned look on my face when I entered.  
  
"Jordan? What's wrong?" He stood and offered me a chair at the table.  
  
"Nothing. Nigel just...he hasn't eaten a real meal since lunch the day we flew over here and he nearly passed out while he was getting dressed." I looked up at him. "He promised me he'd eat if I got it ready for him...what does he like?"  
  
"Give him toast or something light. He's never been a big breakfast eater." Bret smiled at me. "He need help with anything?"  
  
Shaking my head, I grabbed two pieces of bread out of the bag on the counter and placed them in the toaster. "Nah, he was alright once he sat down for a minute." I paused before looking at him again. "That scar's pretty bad." I spoke soft enough for my words not to travel upstairs.  
  
He nodded. "Yeah. You saw it?"  
  
"He was standing in front of the mirror without a shirt on...I didn't mean to look at it but I couldn't keep my eyes off...it's so..." Pausing, I looked back at the toaster, unable to find a word to say what I wanted to.  
  
"I know." Bret walked over and stood next to me. "It's alright, just don't say anything to him about it...he gets touchy sometimes." He whispered. "He's going through enough stress already."  
  
Nodding, I took the toast out of the toaster and buttered it before looking at Bret again. "What does he eat on toast?"  
  
"Strawberry." He walked to the fridge and pulled a jar of strawberry jam off the shelf. "Preserves. He likes it relatively thick too." As he took the lid off and set the jar on the counter next to me, I grabbed a clean knife out of the drawer and began spreading the jam onto the toasted bread.  
  
"Thanks." I put it on the toast and then placed the two slices on a plate. Walking over to the table, I set the plate down and then got him a cup of tea, setting it next to the plate.  
  
He walked downstairs a few minutes later and smiled at me as he sat down at the table. He took a sip of tea and sighed deeply before starting to eat the toast silently. Grabbing a chair, I sat at the table next to him and took a drink of the coffee that I'd poured myself. As I watched him eat, I realized that he was in fact, hungry, because he was focusing everything on eating the toast.  
  
"You want more?" I spoke softly. He shook his head "no" and finished off the first piece, moving onto the second.  
  
I sat and watched him eat the toast silently for a few more minutes before excusing myself from the table to go upstairs and change. Climbing the stairs, I sighed and pushed the door open to the room he and I were sharing. The slight tinge of smoke met my nose and I shook my head, walking over to the window and looking outdoors. The day was bright, and I could only hope that it meant something was going to turn for the better.  
  
TBC...  
  
((A/N - wow! Sorry this took so long for me to get posted! I wasn't really happy with this chapter b/c I kinda got stuck in the middle of it, but this story is going to get wrapped up within the next couple of chapters, so keep on reading and commenting, I really appreciate it! Thanks guys!))


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39 of "Breaking Though"  
  
A/N - Okay guys! Thank you all SO much for the great support and reviews I've gotten. I really appreciate them and it makes me so happy to see that email saying "REVIEW ALERT!" sitting in my inbox. I'd also like to apologize for the long time in between each of these updates...I've had some RL issues that have hampered the muse...and yeah. So I'm trying! Honest. ;) So yeah. I'm trying to find a way to wrap up this story in the next couple of chapters...because I don't want it to drag on and on and on. So keep reading, it may be nearly the end for this story...and then I'll start a new one!  
  
A/N #2 - Okay, yeah...I know I'm skipping the funeral. I just...didn't feel okay writing it. It wasn't working out for me. So this chapter takes place two days afterwards. Keep that in mind when reading. Thanks!!!  
  
Okay, now on with the fic!!!  
  
----Chapter 39----  
  
--Nigel--  
  
_I'm ready to go back. I miss Boston. Miss my friends. I miss Garret, Lily, Bug, Peter...miss my dog and my cat.  
_  
Nigel stood absentmindedly at the sink and stared down at the water dripping from the leaking faucet and trickling down the drainpipe. Sighing deeply, he slipped out of his clothes and turned the shower on, and waited patiently for the water to warm up to the way he liked it. After it was warm, he stepped into the shower and ducked his head beneath the spray, then stood and let the water run over him while he tried to relax.  
  
_I always thought that London was my home...that when I left, I'd always come back. But now that I am back I really don't want to be here. I don't consider this home anymore. Sure, I've got memories, loves, and times here that I'll never forget and I'd never want to. But London has hurt in it. Painful stuff.  
  
Boston is my home. Ever since I landed there, fresh out of the service, black eye and all, I've stayed. Never saw a reason not to. Nothing else appealed to me. Do I regret not looking farther than the airport?_  
  
He leaned up against the cold tiles and a shiver ran down his spine as he wiped the water out of his eyes, but made no effort to stop the shower.  
  
_I've almost died - twice - in Boston. I've watched a woman that I had feelings for meet a man who I now know was perfect for her. I was happy for her. Hell, I set them up.  
  
I helped find him after he was killed. I carried his body from the rubble of that house.  
  
I watched a Garret perform an autopsy on him.  
  
I saw Jordan. I saw the look in her eyes. The expression on her face. I heard her sobs. I felt her heart break.  
  
I saw her at the funeral. I saw the way she was looking at his body.  
  
I know how badly she was hurt._  
  
Nigel ducked his head back under the water to wash the tears that were threatening to spill from his eyes. It didn't matter to him that the water was now cold and he was shivering uncontrollably. He couldn't let anyone see him crying. No one.  
  
_But there's no one here to see you cry. You're alone._  
  
Alone. That was the truth. He was alone. He muttered the word softly, the sound of his voice covered by the rushing water and the sound of his heart beating in his chest.  
  
_You're not alone._  
  
The voice in his head scared him and he jumped. Looking quickly through the frosted glass doors to the shower, he made sure no one was in the room with him before leaning back up against the tile wall.  
  
_You're not alone._  
  
There it was again! He turned off the water to the shower and stood silently, dripping, listening to the noises of the house. Nothing. No one. Grabbing a towel, he dried himself off and stepped from the shower, then pulled on his boxers and a pair of sweatpants, then realized he didn't bring himself a clean shirt. He wrapped the towel around his shoulders and slipped out into the hallway, shivering at the cold air that met him as he walked down the hall towards his room.  
  
He walked into the room and saw Jordan standing at the window, her back to him.  
  
He coughed gently to get her attention, which she did and she briefly turned around before looking back out the window. Nigel noticed that she was crying after a few minutes of standing and watching her silently. He crossed the room and stood behind her a few feet before he gently laid a hand on her back, trying to find something to say to try to calm her down.  
  
--Jordan--  
  
_I'm alone. He's not here. No one is here for me. I have no one._  
  
The world was crashing down on Jordan at this very moment. The loss of Woody was finally hitting her, and now with the stress of what Nigel was dealing with...it was just all falling into a tailspin. There was really no one...even in the house, that could console her. Nigel's aunt had gone with Bret and his family back to their home, to spend a few days away. Only Nigel could help her, but she wasn't about to lay her crap on him right now.  
  
_I saw the look in his eyes at the funeral. I know how much this hurts him.  
  
Both his parents are gone now. I at least still have dad._  
  
At the feel of his hand on her back, she jumped slightly and then lowered her head to her chest, wiping the tears from her eyes as she looked away from the setting evening sun.  
  
He wrapped his arms around her waist and stepped closer to her, resting his head on her shoulder gently.  
  
She managed to squeak out the words "he's really gone..." before she broke down into tears again and clung to him for dear life.  
  
He said nothing.  
  
--Nigel--  
  
_She's talking about HIM and I knew it. It's my fault. Why is it just hitting her now?_  
  
Nigel gently rubbed her back with his free hand while keeping the other firmly wrapped around her. "I'm here. I know he's gone...and I'm sorry baby." He whispered softly and pulled her closer to him.  
  
She sniffed back tears and tried to speak. "Need...need...you...just..."  
  
He nodded. "I'm here. I'm never letting go."  
  
Shaking her head softly, she turned and wrapped her arms around him, pressing her head into his chest.  
  
"Jordan it's alright...I'm here. I'm here." He whispered softly and moved backwards so he was sitting on his bed, her sitting beside him. He held her close to him and tried to get her to relax.  
  
"No...Nigel...I..." She opened her eyes and stared into his for a moment before moving and suddenly kissing him deeply on the mouth.  
  
Surprised, Nigel wasn't sure how to react, but he pulled away from her and shook his head in confusion. "Jordan. What is it? Why...?"  
  
"I need...you." She felt tears well up in her eyes and then she kissed him again, deeper than before.  
  
He was shocked, and he didn't return her kiss. He pulled away and shook his head again. "No...Jordan...we...why...?"  
  
"I need to know I'm alive. I need to know you're alive. I need to feel...loved again." She ran her fingertips down his chest and kissed at his neck. "Please...just...need you..."  
  
Sweet....dear god...I...this...isn't... His brain tried to process everything that was going on. Nigel was confused as all hell, but deep down he knew that he needed this too. But...Jordan? She...she...was Jordan.  
  
She was Jordan. That was exactly it.  
  
"I...Jordan...this..." He shivered as she lowered her lips to his collarbone. "...are you sure?" He reached and pulled her chin up so she was looking him in the eyes.  
  
"I've never been more sure of anything in my entire life." She pushed him so he was lying on his back and she laid next to him, then kissed him softly. "Anything. Ever." Jordan kissed at his neck and then looked him in the eyes. "Aren't you?"  
  
Nigel merely nodded and reached up, pulling her close to him, then kissing her softly on the lips. "Yes." He whispered softly. "God yes." He raised his head and kissed her deeper.  
  
She moaned softly and ran her hands across his chest and then rested them on his hips, pulling at the elastic band on his sweatpants.  
  
They feverishly kissed at each other, pent up feelings and emotions finally getting a chance to express themselves in a way either of them never thought would be happening.  
  
No words were shared, only glances and gazes that communicated everything that needed to be said. It was like it was meant to be. Each of them knew what the other needed, what the other wanted. And in reality, even if it was the emotions or the stress, or the pain and the hurt, neither of them cared.  
  
This was real. This was alive. They were alive.

They needed to know that the most.

TBC...  
  
A/N - Yeah. Chapter 39 is finito. Review.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40 of "Breaking Through"

**A/N - Here it is guys. You only had to beat and prod it out of me. It was in my head, but it wanted to stay there. But I've finally got it down. So I hope you all enjoy this - it's been a long, wild ride - and I'm glad to have shared it with all of you.**

Chapter 40

---- Nigel ----

I wake up to find that a slender arm is draped over my chest, a mass of raven colored curls nestled into the crook of my arm. Looking down, I realize that I, Nigel Townsend, am lying naked in bed with Jordan Cavanaugh, after a night of making utterly fantastic love to one another. I could have died with no regrets a very happy man at that moment in time. Gently, I bring my arm up around her back and rest it on her hip, smiling when it causes her to cuddle closer into me. _"Good morning Love..." _I think to myself as I hear the front door of the house close downstairs. Adjusting the blankets around her back to cover that gorgeous body (even though I would like nothing more than to lay there forever looking at it) I smile as she wakes up, looking up into my eyes.

"Love." I lean my neck down and kiss her lips softly.

---- Jordan ----

_"Love."_ God. The way he let that word roll off his tongue...drove me completely nuts. I would listen to him say it all damn day if I could. "Yeah Nige?" I reached up to gently cup his jaw in my hand, loving the way his breath trickled over my arm.

"Morning." He smiled softly and turned his head to kiss my wrist.

"Morning." I grinned and slid up so my head was next to his. "You know what I realized today is?"

"What? The day we're forced to return to lives and back to Boston?" Nigel leaned his head to the side and looked in my eyes. "Love..."

_"Love." _Again. That word. "Mmmhm?" I smiled at him.

"I don't want this to end here in London." Nigel gently rested his hand on my cheek. "I don't want last night just to be last night. I've waited years for this and I'm not willing to let it slip away when we get on that plane and fly back." He bit his lower lip slightly as we laid there, looking into each other's eyes.

"Alright Nige." I smiled softly and then kissed him. "Good to know we agree on something."

"You agree?"

I laughed when his eyebrows hit his hairline, before he settled his head back down on the bed. "Of course I agree. How could I resist...all you have to offer. Your boyish charm...the mystique...these long arms to hold me close and protect me from bad guys..." I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me and held me close to his chest. "...this sexy hair...that accent...not to mention that you hold a steady job and have a motorcycle."

"Good then." Nigel smiled and kissed me softly, before his aunt called up the stairs to tell us she had breakfast and tea ready and she'd like to actually see her nephew before we left for Heathrow. "Just a moment Auntie, we'll be down." He called down to her and then turned his attention back to me. "What do you say a good old cup of English tea and a toast to Boston..."

"How about a toast to us instead." I smiled up at him and wove my fingers through his long hair, pulling him down for a deep kiss.

"Now that...that I'll toast to."

* * *

---- Garret ----

"Lunchbreaks...have just taken on a whole new meaning for me." I smiled up at Renee as she laid sprawled out on my chest. Leaning my head up, I caught her lips with mine and kissed her softly.

"You know, someone is bound to catch on. The District Attorney and Chief Medical Examiner have taken two hour lunch breaks everyday this week...at the same time as each other, no less." She kissed her way down my neck. "Now...what would you think was going on?"

"If I was a conspiracy theorist, I'd think that they were having rounds of wild...hardcore...sex..." I laughed softly as she made her way to my chest, kissing all over my skin. "But...that'd just be..."

She trailed a hand down my chest and gripped me firmly. "The truth?"

The way the words were whispered from her lips just sent chills down my spine. "Yeah..." I threaded my fingers up through her hair. "...guess it would be." With a smile, I rolled us over and kissed her deep, not even caring about anything in the world except for getting on with round two. She moaned quietly and dropped her head back as I kissed her neck, and I was about to make my way down her chest when my cell phone rang.

"Ignore it Garret." She pulled me down for a kiss. "Let it go."

"I...I can't." I tried to pull my lips from hers and only managed slightly, answering the phone with my chest heaving, still kissing her neck until I brought the phone to my lips. "Macy."

"Garret? It's Jordan. I wanted to tell you Nigel and I are back in Boston. We just landed at Logan - we're gonna head on down to the morgue after we get cleaned up and maybe a bite to eat." Jordan spoke on her cell as Nigel shouldered the duffel bags and they began to make their way through the crowded airport. "Are you there Garret?" She raised an eyebrow as she heard his ragged breathing on the other end.

"Yes...yes Jordan. I'm here." I panted heavily as Renee pointedly grazed her leg against me, a smirk playing across her face. "Just...just was climbing the stairs. Crypt elevator is down and I wanted...to get...a little exercise after lunch."

"Oh God." Jordan's face fell and then she shook her head. "Sorry Garret. You get back to exercising. We'll see you later. Bye now." She rapidly pressed the end button on her phone and then visibly shuddered, before looking up at Nigel.

"What is it Love?"

"I think I called him...in the middle of having sex..." She made a mock gagging motion. "With **_HER_**."

"Awwww bloody hell. That's raunchy." Nigel shook his head as they made it outside to a waiting cab.

"Yeah. I'm not thinking about it." Jordan looked up at him. "Let's go."

"Good plan Love."

* * *

I just looked at the phone before tossing it to the floor as she pulled me down for another deep kiss. "Jordan's back?" She muttered softly against my lips.

"Both of them. Conspiracy theorist number one and number two." I nodded softly.

"Well then." Renee suddenly flipped over so she was on top of me now. "Looks like we should give it one last hurrah, don't you think?"

"Do you even need me to answer that? One would think a lawyer like yourself would be able to..._read people_...pretty well." I smirked slightly and leaned up to kiss her, only to have my shoulders shoved back into the mattress.

"Oh, believe me Garret...I have got reading you...down..."

* * *

---- Jordan ----

_Okay. Just go in his office and tell him you and Nigel are back. Don't talk to him about sex. Don't talk to him about you and Nigel or him and Renee. Just tell him you're home and in one piece. _I paced nervously around in the lobby, waiting for the elevator to arrive to take me up to the morgue's floor. I groaned when I got the image in my head of Garret panting and the reason why, turning around and nearly running into Lily.

"Jordan!" She grinned and wrapped me in a huge hug. "We missed you! Where's Nigel?"

"Oh, he's at his apartment. He needed to get a shower and a nap before he comes in today." I smiled at her as the elevator doors slid open with a ding. "Going up?" I tried to crack a joke to ease my tension about having to face Garret after **_THAT_**.

"Um...the elevator doesn't really go down past the lobby Jordan." Lily smiled at me as we stepped in. "How've you been?"

"Disgusted." I spit out before I could stop myself. When she raised an eyebrow, I shook my head. Might as well give in. "I called Garret in the middle of sex."

"Why would you want to talk to him when you were having sex Jordan?!" Lily rested a hand on her hip, confused. "More importantly...with...?"

"No Lily..." I lowered my voice as we got off at the ninth floor. "Him...and Renee...having..."

"Oh God!" She gasped and then bit her lip when she drew stares from the people around her. "Oh God. That must have...been...awkward."

"To say the least." I rolled my eyes with a sarcastic wink, before I nearly raced into my office and shut the door, thankful that I had made it without coming into contact with Garret yet.

_For God's sake Jordan. He's a grown man and God knows he needed to get laid a long time ago. Be happy for him._ I thought to myself and then looked up as Emmy knocked on my door. I waved her inside.

"Doctor Cavanaugh, Doctor Macy asked me to have you come to his office. He needs to bring you up to speed on some things." She smiled.

"Thanks Emmy." I stood up and took a deep breath, before heading down the hall to his office. I knocked softly on the doorframe and then walked in, shutting the door behind me. "Yeah Garret?"

"Jordan." Garret turned around with a slight smile, obviously as uncomfortable as I was. sit." He motioned at the chair across from his desk.

I walked over and sat, and we both didn't say anything for a few minutes.

"Look Jordan I..." He spoke first, but I cut him off.

"Garret, I..."

He looked up at me and laughed nervously. "Jordan. What...what happened today...I apologize for that..."

"You're allowed to have a sex life, remember? I gave you permission." I smiled softly at him, suddenly not even grossed out by the fact that a little less than two hours ago he was in bed with Renee Walcott, the ice queen herself. "Remember, that long time ago? After the jello incident?"

"Yeah, I remember." Garret lowered his head and looked up at me. "Thanks."

I dragged my chair over to him and looked closer at his face, and at his neck. "You know what though?"

"What Jordan?" He rubbed at his neck where I was looking.

"You're lucky you're sort of red anyways. It blends in a little better." I looked into his eyes and noticed how tired he looked. "You know too much too fast will wear you out...take a break once in a while?" I narrowed my eyes at him. "How often are you getting it?"

"Least twice a day." He spit out before his eyes widened and he dropped his head into his hands. "I did not just say that."

"God damn Garret!" I squeaked out. "You'll hurt yourself!"

---- Garret ----

"Jordan..." I warned sternly, letting her know she was playing with fire.

"Garret! You know...that's...that's a lot." She looked at me and bit her lip. "I'm not saying you don't deserve to be able to have sex twice a day but...no offense Gar...you're not getting any younger."

"Exactly." I smiled and nodded.

"Exactly?" She raised an eyebrow and just looked at me, confused.

"Yeah. I'm not getting any younger, so I might as well make good use of the fact that I'm still able to get -- "

"Garret! God stop!! Please!!!" She clapped her hands over her ears. "I don't need to know that. Just stop. Now."

Once she had removed her hands from her ears, I nodded. "So how've you been?" When she didn't answer and just looked away, I sat up slightly and leaned forwards. "Jordan...you alright?"

"Fine Garret. I'm fine." She smiled at me and then looked down again, blushing slightly.

"Spill it. I swear I won't tell anyone." When she still made no effort to speak, I decided to be nice about it. "Are you happy Jor?" I asked her quietly.

"What?!" She looked up at me, that being the last thing she was expecting me to ask.

"Are you happy Jor?" I smiled softly at her. "You look happy."

"We're happy Garret." Jordan smiled shyly and nodded. "We're happy to be home and happy to be together."

"You know he always had a crush on you, right?" A twitch of my lips threatened to break my calm composure that I was trying to hold so well.

"It's more than a crush now." Jordan admitted and then smiled. "Well, the crush phase is over, I guess you could say."

"Jordan...you didn't...you did." I laughed softly. "Finally. Too bad my bet for the office pool was for five years ago."

"Your what?!" She screeched at me. "You guys were betting on when we'd finally have sex?"

I froze. "You guys had sex?"

"Oh. Shit." Jordan looked at me. "Yeah, we did. But it was what we both wanted and needed. I was okay with it and he was too."

"Jordan there isn't a policy on sex with co-workers but if it begins to affect your relationship..."

"Garret, you're sleeping with the district attorney, twice a day, everyday." She looked at me with a smirk. "I believe you have no room to be lecturing me. She's your **boss** for God's sake. Nigel is at least...equal."

I had to admit. She did have me there. "Very true." I smiled at her. "Now if you're up to it...we've got a nursing home signout in autopsy one that needs an ME."

"Got it Garret." Jordan nodded as I handed her the case file. "Then can I go home and get some sleep?"

"Of course. Tell Nigel I'm glad he's back, alright?"

"Sure thing. Sir yes sir!" She saluted as she walked out the door and down the hall.

"Dork." I muttered softly before going back to my paperwork.

* * *

---- Nigel ---- "Love?" I looked up as I heard the door to my apartment open, and watched as Rudy scurried across the floor and nearly tackled Jordan to the ground. "How was work? More important, how was Doctor M.?" I walked over and kissed her softly before I shut the door behind her.

"Well, work was good, and Garret says he's glad you're back." She smirked at me. "And he found out."

"About us? How?" I raised an eyebrow and pulled a beer out of the fridge, handing it to her after I cracked the top off.

"I let it slip because I thought he knew already. But he has no room to speak. He's getting laid twice a day, everyday." She smiled as she took a drink off her beer. "So how bad's this jetlag going to hit us?"

"It's a bitch." I nodded and took a drink. "We should go straight to bed after these beers."

"Bed. You. Me. Good idea." She kissed me and then took another drink.

We both laughed, and then stood in the kitchen in relative silence, drinking our beers. Neither of us wanted to make the first move to go to bed. After we finished and looked at each other for a moment, I stepped forwards and kissed her softly. "Come on Love."

She wrapped her arms around my waist and smiled up at me. "Don't ever stop calling me that."

"Never Jordan. I will never stop calling you Love."

"Good." She pulled me towards the bedroom and once we were in, she pulled me down on the bed and kissed me.

I could get really used to this. Even though it was still a little awkward, me and Jordan, together - it was perfect. It made me wonder why I'd waited so long to make a move...and why she'd waited so long to let me know how she felt. It felt like it was always meant to be. She had finally let me in, took down those walls she'd built up around her heart, and let me love her that I'd been waiting to do for years.

* * *

---- Garret ----

"So she was in Boston for a total of two hours and she had it completely figured out?" Renee laid her head on my chest and drew designs on my stomach with a fingertip. "We're that obvious?"

"Well, she didn't get it completely right." I laughed softly, remembering the conversation we had in my office. "She spotted the marks on my neck and noticed how tired I looked. But she thinks it's twice a day, everyday. She mentioned that I was going to end up hurting myself."

"Twice a day?! I'm hurt." She pouted and looked up at me. "Did you tell her I was much better than that?"

"I attempted. Then she mentioned that twice a day was "a lot" and I made the mention of the fact that I'm not getting any younger...and the fact that I still can at least twice a day..."

"You didn't." Renee swatted at my chest, a smirk on her face. "She freaked out, didn't she." She rested her lips against my skin with a soft sigh.

"To say the least. So I dropped it. But...I guess her and Nigel have no room to talk. They've finally gotten together as well." I shifted slightly underneath her so I could kiss the top of her head.

"Damn. And we finally gave up on the pool two years ago." She bit her lip and then nipped at my chest. "Guess that's one hundred bucks I'll never see again."

"You bet on them too?" I smiled down at her.

"Yeah. Soon as I showed up it was already long standing. I jumped right in, being stupid enough to think they might actually get together some time this century. Took them long enough."

"Yeah. It did." I smiled and leaned my head back against the pillow as she curled into me. "But Jordan's happy again, finally. She let someone into that place in her heart that she keeps under lock and key. Finally one of them was able to break through and get in. And I'm glad it's Nigel."

"Garret, you're rambling again..." Renee laughed softly and kissed my chest, before closing her eyes. "I don't know about you, but sleep is generally important to being able to walk, talk, and function tomorrow at work."

"I'll take the hint baby." I slung an arm around her back and shut my eyes. "Night Renee."

"Goodnight Garret."

I listened for a few minutes until I heard her breathing even out as she fell asleep on my chest. Sure, life wasn't back to normal, and it probably never would be. Woody was dead, as was Nigel's dad. Jordan and Nigel were hooking up...and I was sleeping with Renee. Talk about a messed up life we all were living. To an outsider, we probably looked like a bad soap opera.

But it was different for us. We were family.

We'd lost one of our own and rallied around each other to keep our heads above the floodwaters. We nearly lost another but we pulled together again and we fought through it. Nigel and I had helped Jordan best we could when Woody was killed. Renee helped me through the nightmares I had afterwards. We all were there when Nigel was shot. Jordan helped him as he worked through the physical therapy and the nightmares he had, especially when he had to testify against the guys in court. Renee had made that as painless as possible - only asking him what she knew they needed, and riding the defense attorney's ass when the man started straying from relevant information.

When they had been convicted we'd gone out and celebrated together. Nigel was just walking with a cane by then - his therapy had gone quite well - and he and Jordan had danced. I remembered how he'd left the cane at the bar next to me, and how Renee walked in and made a comment about that fact that I was starting to show my age.

Jordan had helped him with his dad. And in turn, Nigel had helped Jordan with getting over Woody.

Sure, it came in perhaps a way that to most could be considered different or unusual. But what did it matter what anyone else thought? Life for them all was finally getting back to a sense of normal that we all really wanted more than anything. We had finally all broken through the walls that surrounded each other and let go. Sure it wasn't perfect. But it was good enough.

**FIN.**

**And that's that. It's actually depressing for me to end this fic, but fear not, my friends. While I was writing it, the idea came to me for another one, which will come soon. And I swear it won't take as long to update in between chapters. Thank you all for sticking with me for this long long time - over a year. It's been a wild ride.**

**- Alison**


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